We All Have Our Biases

Taking a chance in a different environment can change the way you perceive the world

In my early twenties, I worked within the mortgage industry. I loved the environment. Then in my quest for upward mobility, I applied for and was offered a position in a traditional Jewish Hasidic bank.

Did I mention ‘traditional’?

I was gently reminded prior to my interview that I should wear a skirt located well below the knees, sleeves at least elbow length, and my cleavage covered as well.

Thus began my dilemma.

Remember I was in my twenties and wearing short skirts to display my 5'9" of long perfectly young legs was the order of my days. My figure was young and I wore it like a banner!

So to be told I was to cover up almost in a nun-like manner just got my nerve endings in a tizzy. I was a bit peeved!

Take a risk

I decided to attend the interview anyway and I dressed as demurely as I could. The meeting went very well and I was offered the position with monetary compensation that was a nice increase from my current job.

There were a number of reasons why I had pursued the new position. One such reason was, I had purchased my first home and the travel distance to work was a major factor. Of course, an increase in pay was a nice boon as well.

Although I was offered the position I was ‘really’ reluctant to accept. I had already formed preconceived notions in my mind.

I formed conclusions based on biased conversations I had been privy to. Personally I had never been in close contact with Hasidic Jewish persons or knew anything of their customs.

I was also not looking forward to dressing like a “religious person” and wearing looong flowing skirts and long-sleeved shirts buttoned all the way to my throat each day was not in the cards for me.

What you may find

On my first day, I was greeted with warmth and welcomed into their environment with open arms. I was one of only four persons of color. It was nice to observe a respectful, and peaceful atmosphere.

Although their customs prohibited them from celebrating Christmas, my fellow employees made sure to respect my traditions and would even present me with Christmas gifts.

The men and women, both young and old were so open and friendly. I asked numerous questions regarding their religious beliefs and they always responded with openness.

I came to understand much about their faith. We shared a lot of information and our bonds of friendship grew.

Eventually, all roads led us to different paths and it came time to part ways. We ALL had tears in our eyes.

I loved my time working there, I was afforded so much love and respect and an open-minded appreciation for practices different from mine.

The takeaway

That experience has become the yardstick by which I judge all other employment and many life interactions.

I remain cautious but open-minded and make every effort to interact with my fellow humans based on their willingness to participate and not based on a particular bias.

I rely on my own interactions not on perceived notions.

Though we may enter life experiences armed with many biased opinions, we can learn to coexist peacefully.

This may be achieved by making a decision to understand, accept and respect others with beliefs or practices different from our own.

We can still be who we are while we allow others the same courtesy.

And in so doing we can make life just a little better for us all.