Summary

The article reflects on the grim reality of war, its impact on society, and the reasons behind its perpetuation, while questioning how to educate future generations about its true nature.

Abstract

The author grapples with the fascination their seven-year-old grandson has with the history of war, despite his limited understanding of its horrors. The piece delves into the instinctual nature of conflict in humans, from personal to global scales, and the various motivations behind wars, including money, land, greed, narcissism, religion, and power. The author expresses frustration and concern over the glorification of war and the continuous cycle of violence, suggesting that education and modeling positive behaviors can influence children's perceptions and potentially lead to a more peaceful society. The article concludes with a call to action for teaching the next generation the realities of war, supported by a poem emphasizing the impact of a child's environment on their development.

Opinions

The author is disturbed by the grandson's romanticized view of war, fearing it stems from a lack of awareness of its true consequences.
There is a recognition of humanity's inherent fight instinct, but a clear distinction is made between personal defense and the organized brutality of war.
The author is critical of the underlying causes of war, particularly the roles of religion and power, viewing them as irrational and destructive forces.
The article suggests that the cycle of violence can be broken through intentional education and by fostering environments that promote patience, confidence, justice, faith, self-likeness, love, and acceptance.
The author remains skeptical about the possibility of ending war due to the persistent nature of human conflict but holds hope in the power of teaching and positive influence.
The author advocates for sharing personal family histories and stories as a means to convey the realities of war to the younger generation.

War is Hell

So Why Do We Keep Doing It?

The other day, our seven-year-old grandson said to me, “I love history. Especially the history of war.” It stunned me for a few moments. How in the world would a small American child, a second grader, know much about war? How would he know enough to say he loves the history of war?

And, as a follow-up in my teacher/grandparent/human brain, why would he LOVE war??

I didn’t say much in response to this but will definitely engage with him on the topic as he grows older. The reason I’m waiting is that I don’t want to traumatize him. He is not yet aware of how the majority of our family on my side was decimated in the Holocaust. Or how one of his great-grandfathers was emotionally damaged fighting in World War II. Or how many children die brutal deaths or at the very least, witness the brutal slaughter and grave injuries of their loved ones. I’m pretty sure he thinks the weapons of war are just cool, and the people who use them are even cooler. It really bothers me that he thinks that, and that’s why I’m writing my way to meaning with this article you’re reading.

Nature or Nurture

Are humans designed to fight for what they want and need? Hell yes, we are. Case in point the many comedy movies created to show people fighting for the last popular toy during the Christmas shopping season, or local news stories about teens fighting in the school yard. And if you touch one hair on the head of my kids or grandkids, I will personally rip yours off your shoulders and toss it over a bridge. So, yes, we have a fight instinct.

But when that fight is at a global level, when the people at the “top” send our youngest adults to kill each other in large numbers using more and more disturbing, gruesome methods, when groups of people in a country or religious organization or within a country go to war, that’s whole other thing.

And that thing makes me angry, sad, frightened, and completely flummoxed at the same time. Who thought this was a good idea, and why are we still doing it? And why is our grandson intrigued with the idea of it? And how the hell do we get off this crazy-pants ride??

The Bases of War

Money, land, greed, narcissism, religion, and power. Not in that order, but that’s it in a nutshell.

Religious wars, where people think they are doing God’s work by killing everyone who doesn’t follow their religious rules, defies this old woman’s ability to rationalize. But then again, religion by definition is not rational, so I’m really not sure if this is something that can ever stop. It’s been going on for millennia and continues to confound and disturb.

The others all come down to one thing and that’s power. Me and mine over you and yours. An endless desire to own, to rule, to run things, to have things, a big fat fuck you to everyone else. And that may be even more confounding and disturbing to me than a religious bent. Of course, some would argue that organized religion was begun as a means to control others, to take power. But true believers would kill them for saying that out loud. A truly vicious cycle.

Can Anything Be Done Ever?

I heard a poem years ago that informed my teaching, my parenting, and my general outlook towards life. It is powerful in its obvious simplicity, and I share it widely because if more people think like this, just maybe they can beat the murderous power-mongers into submission. And I might mean that literally.

CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE

— Dorothy Law Nolte

If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.

If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.

If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.

If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence.

If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.

If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith.

If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.

Is it realistic or, adversely, naïve to think human beings will ever stop mass-murdering each other for nefarious reasons? I haven’t seen much evidence to give me hope. But as soon as I can, I will be teaching my grandson that war is not cool.

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Thanks for reading and I truly hope it gives you pause. Below, find the article I will one day show my grandson.

My Father Was a World War II Prison Camp Survivor

My family had some peculiar proclivities when I was growing up. Dad would not even entertain the idea of eating sweet…

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Also, I wrote a novel that includes fictionalized versions of our family history. Please give it a read…

Woven: Six Stories, One Epic Journey - Maureen Morrissey

I grew up hearing stories. My own family stories involved surviving years in a prison camp during the Holocaust and…

maureenmorrissey.com