Unpopular Opinions: Why Are White Men Afraid To Date Black Women?
I wonder…
Today I was on the I-4 stuck in traffic heading to my job in Orlando. Usually, during this time, I may have my Pandora playing music or I would have YouTube playing listening to channels that talk about mindsets or on starting a business and the like.
During this, my mind starts to wander like it does throughout my life when I’m alone with no distractions. It starts to ask questions some I already know the answers to and some just make me stop in my tracks, as I try to find an answer to it like…
Why Are White Men Afraid To Date Black Women?
I try to search it on my phone but I have it set up in “Drive Mode” so that I won't be disturbed and even then I would need to type out what I want to find out on the Google app on my phone.
Since I cannot type and drive for the life of me I usually will put the question on the back burner until I get to work.
While my Boss is boring us to all hell in the usual morning meeting I took this time and opened my Desktop and Google and typed “Why Are White Men Afraid To Date Black Women” on the search bar.
I got tons of results but mostly about why black women are dating white guys and not the other way around. I searched the search results and could not really find anything on “Why Are White Men Afraid To Date Black Women” is Google hiding the truth? Do they not want us to know why White men are afraid to date Black Women?
It may be a conspiracy in the works I don’t know! lol
Since Google did not give me an answer to my question I decided to add my two cents and dig into the past and pull out some answers of what I have seen so that we can understand the “Why” and maybe come up with some answers.
I grew up in an Interracial Family
Being Latin, I grew up in a family where everyone came in different colors. So to me, color really isn’t something that weighs heavy in my mind. I’m the product of a father who is from Spain and a mother who is Puerto Rican so just by being this, I can move between White and Black worlds without an issue which brings me to this, I can answer this question since I have lived in both worlds.
You may not agree with what I will say in this article but if you want you can comment in the comment box and let me know your reasons why I’m wrong or right. Still, I’m going to write this just so that people can begin to write about this topic.
White Men Have Not Been Exposed To Other Racial Groups.
You would be surprised that there are still people out here in the US that have never seen a person of color other than on TV. This could be one of the many reasons I will list that could prevent a White man to meet, date or even marry a Black woman. To them, a Black Woman is something exotic and strange. And you know people when they don’t know about something or are not comfortable enough with the idea because they just don’t know they just ignore it and stick to their group.
I remember growing up in NYC and living in an area that was predominately Black and Hispanic. I rarely saw a white anything unless they were there to buy drugs or were cops. Never dated a white woman during that time until I joined the Navy and was stationed down South. There I was exposed to white women and being that I knew little about them, I still was able to date them. At first, I was confused but being interracial, I was able to be quick on figuring them out.
Many of the white women I dated never dated a Latin male let alone knew what a Latin male was other than Mexican! I had to school them and show them that being Latin does not mean that we are all Mexican, but that we come from many different backgrounds and cultures and the only thing tying us together is the Spanish language. Much like Britain and the US, different cultures same language albeit with little differences
White Men Are Afraid Of Being Ostracized!
This I think is a huge reason why I think White Men are afraid to date Black women for fear of being ostracized or being made fun of by their peers and family. We have all seen the movies and TV shows how some white dude falls for this black woman and vice versa and all hell breaks loose!
Just like in the movie “Jungle Fever” by Spike Lee
The family will begin to question why are you dating a black woman? Some will even be mean and joke that “What you a brotha now?” or worse they may say that you are staining the family blood as if that is really a thing! A White man is afraid of being seen differently because he saw a Black woman he liked and decided to leave the group to meet with another person outside the group.
I had that happen to a cousin of mine! Yes, in Latin cultures marrying or being seen dating another woman or man outside the race is also considered bad. My cousin who is mixed like me, his dad and my dad grew up in the same town and came to the US and his dad married my aunt.
My cousin who looks white decided to marry a Salvadoran woman who looked Indian and while we were all celebrating their marriage, my cousin's uncle came up to me and my father as we watched everyone have fun, this fucker decided to say “You see this shit! I don’t understand why this kid married a fucking Indian! Messing up the blood!” I was shocked, but not surprised that was coming from him. Anyway, my father quickly put a stop to it and said in Spaniard Spanish “Who the fuck are you to say such a thing about your nephew? If he wants to marry her then let him! You have no say in the situation!”
I guess dad got mad because he picked up on what my cousin’s uncle said may be referred to my father and us as well. He was not having that!
My cousin's uncle quickly changed his tone because me and Dad were peering at him with that “You better take that shit somewhere else!”
I have friends who are white who would tell me how they would constantly have to argue with their relatives and at times cut relatives off because they were dating a Black woman. So could this be the reason why White Men Are Afraid Of Dating Black Women?
Negative Stereotypes Tend To Scare White Men.
The media is a very powerful tool which if you allow it can mold your perspective and make you believe what they want you to believe. Whether it's the news or whatever form of media you use this will affect our decisions and perceptions of the world.
I mean really have you seen how they portray Blacks and Latin people? Most of the time we are portrayed as criminals and killers which in reality is not true. Sure they may be some people in our groups who may become criminals but that happens in all groups, but it does not define us or the group. For the majority of us, we are out here trying to make a living like you are.
Negative Views About Interracial Relationships.
These days we like to think that we are open-minded when it comes to many social issues but lately, I have come across many people complaining about interracial relationships being a bad thing. People tend to say that interracial kids tend to be confused about who they are. That type of excuse is in my mind bullshit! Why would you want to be one or the other when you have the best of both worlds? You are a person that can go from one group to another without any issues or confusion.
For me, I love being both! I have the ability to see both the white side of me as well as the black side of me. This has helped me to understand the world I live in and even changed my view of the world. Sitting in just one group because you may feel lost or alone I actually enjoy being me. I don’t care what group I feel I need to be in because to be honest, I love both sides.
No, you are not diluting your blood by mixing with other people from other groups or your group will not be bred out of existence either. The stuff I have been able to find out here on the Internet is so sad. So many negative reasons are out there and even dare I say racist views as well, which I find so sad as being interracial is a beautiful thing! At least in my book!
In Conclusion:
Look fellas! You should just stop being held back by others' views of you. If you want to date a Black woman or any other woman from other social groups may I suggest that you jump in and see what happens! Just like I did when I began to date White women several years ago. Even now as I speak these words into existence I’m married to a beautiful Latin Black woman! Mother to my children and my best friend in the whole wide world! I have no regrets and my kids have no regrets about who they are.
Variety is the spice of life they say and to that statement, I agree 100%! Why live your life limited when you can live it limitless! My fellow White men go ahead and get yourself that sexy Nubian Queen and make her yours! Stop lying to yourself and who knows maybe you will realize all that negative stigma against women of color is all nonsense! Just ask my dad who has been married to my mom for over 50 years. At least you can figure that they are doing something right!
Check out Unpopular Opinions for more excellent articles! Joselromero $$$