Under the Positive Vibes Movement: ‘Only Good Vibes’ and Our Emotional Health
Is it truly only about good feelings? The inability to freely express societal-taboo emotions like sadness or anger can lead to imbalances in our mental health and emotional well-being. In this article, I have shared my thoughts on the potential effects of the “Only Good Vibes” movement on our psychology and my own experiences.
Hello dear Medium readers and writers!
Today, I want to discuss the trend we’ve become accustomed to in recent years, both online and in homes, shops, bars, or hotel decorations: the Only Good Vibes! We’ve all seen the “only good vibes” slogan that has become very famous in recent years. This is an “ideology” that has gained popularity, promoting positivity and avoiding anything that could bring us down.
Maintaining a positive outlook is undoubtedly valuable, but can completely ignoring emotions like anger or sadness truly be healthy for us?
As we all know, life is full of ups and downs, and these ups and downs are defined as the Life-Death-Life cycle in Clarissa Estes’ Skeleton Woman tale in the book Women Who Run with the Wolves. Where there is life, there is also death, and after each death, life will return. However, every death should be mourned; unmourned death and unexperienced pain are like unfinished events in our brains, and a new event cannot occur until an old one is completely closed. In simple terms, I believe we cannot heal the pain we haven’t experienced.
While pondering these thoughts, I wanted to write an article discussing how this new trend could affect us and share some perspectives that could help us during these times.
In my opinion, as long as emotions can be expressed in a healthy manner and don’t pose a threat to anyone, all emotions should be welcomed with tolerance. Emotions are one of the most important components of the complex structure that makes us human, providing us with an incredibly powerful means of describing how we feel and guiding us in making better decisions in life.
Especially in this age, where we try to showcase the brightest aspects of our lives on platforms like Instagram in the “influencer” era, with everyone seemingly having high economic prosperity, not having to work, preparing ecological, forest fruit “bowls” while you are on a crowded bus heading to a job you have to go to early in the morning, and reading a “only positive thoughts” message that may not resonate with your desired life, not only fails to convey a positive message but can also significantly dampen your mood for the day.
Instead of just following a strict positivity, I believe celebrating reality and vulnerability is more appropriate. We should remember that life is full of challenges, and these ups and downs define the Life-Death-Life cycle mentioned earlier. Death exists everywhere there is life, and after every death, life will return. However, each death should be mourned; unmourned death and unexperienced pain are like unfinished events in our brains, and a new event cannot occur until an old one is completely closed.
In this context, it is important to create an environment where individuals receive support even in their vulnerable moments when developing true empathy and understanding. By creating connections where we can truly uplift each other, we can build a more inclusive and compassionate community, which will contribute to our mental well-being.
I strive to maintain a balance that allows for the healthy expression of emotional complexities for emotional well-being. I acknowledge that all emotions, including the difficult ones, are part of my human experience. This is not a rejection of the power of positivity but an acknowledgment that feeling emotions, including the difficult ones, in a non-judgmental way is a relieving reality.
To quote the famous author and researcher Brené Brown, “We cannot selectively numb emotions; when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.” Therefore, making space for all emotions in our hearts is a critical part of our journey towards holistic well-being.
So, how can we strike a balance between allowing our emotions to flow freely and preventing them from negatively affecting our lives? I want to share some behaviors that have been beneficial for me:
Mindfulness Practice: Practices like meditation or deep breathing, such as mindfulness, have had a positive impact on me by helping me notice my emotions and savor the present moment. Although I haven’t established a routine, knowing that this practice can always help me in my most challenging moments gives me a sense of confidence. These practices not only provide support in difficult moments but also help maintain a balanced stance in the face of life’s ups and downs.
Seeking Support: The most significant game-changer in my journey was receiving psychological support every week for a year. There, I discovered that expressing my anger and setting boundaries in a healthy way was my natural right, and this behavior would protect me from major emotional outbursts. For me, setting boundaries and saying no was challenging, and if not properly controlled, it could escalate into an unwarranted burst of anger. Besides professional support, seeking support from friends or family when I needed to discuss and express my emotions proved to be undeniably beneficial. Acknowledging that seeking support and knowing that we are not alone in this journey is crucial for overcoming challenging times in life.
Creative Activities: Another outlet for me has been exploring creative outlets such as writing, painting, or engaging with music to calm my mind, much like meditation. Discovering creative outlets for expressing my emotions constructively has been truly beneficial. These activities not only help express emotions but also assist me in understanding what I truly feel, especially in moments when I struggle to define what I am feeling. Sometimes emotions can be so complex that beneath a massive outburst of anger, there may be a sad child who couldn’t reach what they desired. I discovered this especially through experiences with free writing habits like journaling.
Seeing, recognizing, and accepting our emotions as they are can help us understand the richness of the human experience and establish a healthier internal balance. Beyond positive thinking and the understanding of “only good vibes,” accepting emotional complexities allows us to develop genuine self-awareness and compassion toward others. I believe having an embracing perspective is crucial for achieving emotional well-being amid life’s ups and downs. Instead of limiting ourselves and others to only positive emotions, celebrating our emotional richness can help build deeper human connections and, in turn, create a more inclusive community.
Let’s not forget that emotions offer us a language that describes our humanity, and understanding them begins with truly understanding ourselves and others.
Thank you very much for accompanying me this far. I wish everyone a wonderful life where all emotions can be freely and fearlessly expressed. While there is much to improve on this journey, whatever happens, we are doing our best with our current selves, and that alone is enough to nurture infinite self-compassion.
Embracing you with love!
Selin
