Summary

The article "Un-American Me" reflects on the author's disillusionment with the traditional American Dream, advocating for a life focused on personal fulfillment and social values rather than material consumption and societal expectations.

Abstract

"Un-American Me" is a personal essay by Remington Write that critically examines the concept of the American Dream. The author recounts their upbringing in a midwestern family, where the traditional aspirations of homeownership, car ownership, and parenthood were the norm. However, the author found these ideals to be unfulfilling and stressful, especially when observing the disparities in freedom and opportunity across different socioeconomic backgrounds. The essay argues that the American Dream, as sold through post-World War II consumerism, is a myth that prioritizes money and consumption over genuine freedom and happiness. The author, who has chosen a life without a mortgage, car, or children, emphasizes the importance of personal interests, such as painting and traveling, over societal pressures to conform. The piece also touches on the economic implications of reduced consumption during holidays and the broader impact of American foreign policy on the global perception of the American Dream. The author concludes by expressing solidarity with like-minded individuals who prioritize human connection and civic engagement over material wealth.

Opinions

The author views the traditional American Dream, with its emphasis on home and car ownership, as a source of stress rather than a path to happiness.
The essay suggests that the American Dream is not equally attainable for all, with systemic inequalities limiting the freedom of certain groups, particularly in terms of incarceration rates and access to healthcare.
The author criticizes the consumer-driven economy, which demands constant growth and encourages debt-fueled spending, as an unsustainable and destructive force.
The piece reflects on the irony of being encouraged to shop as a response to the September 11 attacks, highlighting the misguided prioritization of consumerism over other forms of recovery or resilience.
The author expresses a sense of disconnection from patriotic narratives, especially in light of historical U.S. interventions in South America, which have undermined the American Dream for people in those regions.
The essay advocates for a different set of values, where personal freedom is defined by the pursuit of art, travel, and community involvement rather than material possessions.
The author identifies with a community of individuals who reject the conventional American Dream in favor of a more connected and values-driven life.

Un-American Me

How a nice girl from the midwest went bad

Photo Credit — Jon Dawson / Flickr — Downtown Cleveland

What is this American Dream I keep hearing about?

I think my dad had it; the owning-your-own-home bit anyway. Watching him haul out the storm windows and lose a weekend putting them up or calculating how much that new roof was going to run didn’t look so dreamy to me.

Owning and maintaining a four-bedroom house that was built in 1895 on top of working one full time and a variety of part time jobs to keep a decent car running and raise four daughters wore the guy down. He seemed less stressed after he gave the house to one daughter and moved into a trailer park outside of town. Not happy but less stressed.

I’m the only one of my sisters to not hold a mortgage, not drive a car, and not be a parent. What a weirdo.

I suspect the whole “American Dream” thing got legs under it during the explosion of consumerism and advertising that came on the heels of World War II. And that war came on the heels of The Great Depression when the prospect of prosperity was little more than a bad joke to too many people in this country (including my grandmother who talked about not buying shoes for the kids during the summer). No wonder the idea of a little home of one’s own with a yard and a driveway and a car in the garage was so seductive. American Dream indeed.

Just as a prophet has no honor in her homeland, few are the teenagers who are happy with that homeland. I sure wasn’t. I couldn’t wait to get the hell out of that little town. But I bet there were more than a few teenagers in my current neighborhood who long for a backyard and the chance to get a learner’s permit and start driving.

What is the American Dream, then?

According to my Social Studies teacher in the 8th grade it is all about Freedom. We heard a lot in school back in the 1970’s about how horrible things were for people in the Soviet Union where they didn’t have Freedom. True enough, that was an iron-fisted authoritarian society where The State determined many aspects of people’s lives. We didn’t and don’t have that here.

But let’s look at our Freedom for a moment.

Sure, we’re Free to do the work we want but only if we’re born to the right parents and grow up in the right neighborhoods. Those yearning teens in my current neighborhood didn’t (and don’t) have that luxury which is why they so badly wanted to get behind the wheel of a car and get the hell out of here.

We’re Free to marry who we want and to have as many children as we want or have none if that’s our choice. This is a little tougher for women who live in areas where nearly 40% of the men are incarcerated, many for the same crimes that other men (white men) have committed with impunity for decades. It’s also tricky when simple neo-natal care is not available. There are thousands of such semi-hidden barriers to Freedom throughout this country.

This is a society which touts Freedom but worships Money. To be a successful American is to Consume. To be a wildly successful American is to ensure that other people make more money.

I grew up with a set of basic assumptions. I would marry. I would have kids. I would own a house. I would drive a car. And, while I never consciously rebelled against any of these goals, I never reached for them either. None of those objectives were all that compelling to me. I was more interested in painting murals, riding across the country, traveling to Europe on my own, going to college, moving to New York City, going to Burning Man (seven times), and writing stories.

And while I was doing all that stuff the people around me were marrying, having kids, buying cars, buying life insurance, buying houses, and getting ready for the holidays.

I stopped “doing” holidays decades ago. There was this one tired Saturday when I looked around the apartment where I lived by myself and realized I was going to have to put all that shit away again. All the lights, the decorations, the tinsel and crap all had to be boxed back up and put into the closet until the next time when it would have to be hauled out again. That was it. That crap didn’t go back in the closet; it went to the Salvation Army and I quit.

If even half this country did as I do at Christmas time the economy would crater.

We live in a consumer-driven economy that demands more and more consumption. Those quarterly growth stats aren’t going to increase all on their own, people. Get out there and buy stuff. Buy stuff you don’t need. Go into debt to buy more stuff. Hell, go into debt to get a college degree so you can get a better job and buy more stuff. This is an engine that is incinerating entire lives in its inexhaustible need for more fuel.

It’s some share-holder’s American Dream, all right.

Before the smoke even cleared on Wednesday, September 12, 2001, we were being exhorted to “not let the terrorists win”….by going shopping.

I won’t. I don’t. And I still have more stuff than I need. The law in this 500 square foot apartment is that nothing new comes in unless something else goes out. But even if we don’t buy stuff, people give us stuff.

And then there’s Patriotism.

Here’s where I really haul out the soap box, friends, so you may want to step back or even go check out some articles about How to Succeed on Medium.

Let’s ask people throughout South America about this, ahem, American Dream? The centuries (yes, centuries) of U.S. “intervention” in the internal affairs of countries like Chile and Argentina, to name only two countries which have been massively destabilized by this country’s actions, have ensured that the American Dream is only for select populations in The United States.

So, no, I’m not a chaser of the American Dream. I live very close to the ground and as I watch the convulsions and upheavals of the everyday world get more and more violent I focus on what I can do in my own tiny plot of garden to keep the weeds pulled and let the flowers have a chance. I am not optimistic nor do I lay awake at night in anxiety and dread.

I am also not alone.

There are more of us than anyone thinks; people who value connection over acquisition. People who still read books. People who are registered to vote and who get out there and support candidates who represent their values. People who are usually kind and who listen. People who don’t label themselves by nationality. People who have a very different dream than the one being crammed down our throats by advertisers and influencers.

If you’re still reading chances are that you’re one of us.