‘Ultimate Evil’ Oil Concerns Will Prevent Climate Change Action

I hate to say it, and I hope I’m wrong, but on the day that COP28 opens — and judging by what happened at COP27, where nothing except a plan to compensate nations suffering from the effects of climate change was decided — there is little to suggest that any meaningful breakthroughs to combat global warming will be agreed (let alone implemented) at this year’s summit.

First of all, COP28 is being hosted in Dubai where the head of the UAE’s state-controlled oil company is overseeing the whole event. This is akin to putting a bunch of cobras in charge of a rodent development committee and reminds me of Trump’s Republican Health Caucus in 2017 where not a single woman was present during discussions to slash maternity benefits.

The city of Dubai forms an absurd backdrop against what the UN Secretary-General, Antonio Guterres called today “climate collapse in real time”, admittedly quite restrained for someone who only recently labeled our current situation as an “era of global boiling”.

One of the issues detractors had with COP27 last year in Egypt, was that the whole event appeared to pander to oil concerns, whose delegates lurked in the shadows to make deals and help derail any potential progress in the battle to reduce greenhouse gas emissions.

So what do we have here already? Leaked documents revealed UAE plans to use the summit to discuss oil and gas deals with 15 of the attending states. And people wonder why Greta Thunberg is so exasperated with the lack of progress over the past couple of decades since it became blindingly evident that man is responsible for a dangerously warming planet.

I believe that these fossil fuel concerns (and many others for that matter whose interests are at stake), will prevent progress again. And to be frank, since their underlying purpose in life seems to be to provide value to shareholders and/or royal families, why would they change sides now?

These corporations, state or otherwise, remind me of the malevolent ball of negative energy in the sci-fi movie The Fifth Element, which not only absorbs phaser or photon rocket attacks but feeds on them to expand and become more powerful.

Known as the Ultimate Evil, this seemingly indestructible ball of anti-matter is able to “annihilate entire planets” in its quest to extinguish all life which sounds disturbingly familiar.

However, its plan is eventually thwarted by The Fifth Element, represented in human form by the unlikely but enchanting Milla Jovovich, who eventually reunites with the other four (less alluring) elements to form an impenetrable union of nature and save the day. Bruce Willis helped a bit too.

Why are we not surprised that it was a woman at the center of the solution?

It’s called Mother Nature FFS.

Women are nurturing, they’re generally non-violent, they’re more emotionally mature, and their bodies don’t contain so much of that annoying testosterone that forces men into a never-ending cycle of competition as to who has the flashiest car or largest bank account.

They’re also maddeningly effective at arguing their case (guys be honest, how many disputes have you won at home with the Mrs?).

I would be willing to bet that if men were immediately retired from all these summits and positions of power and ordered to perform menial duties, say cleaning up oceans, natural habitats, and the atmosphere, the woman who replaced them would make considerably more progress in tackling global warming.

Former New Zealand Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern could maybe head the summit with Greta and other notable female activists on the panel as well.

Last month Iceland’s Prime Minister Katrín Jakobsdóttir joined the country’s women who went on strike to achieve equal pay and end gender-based violence.

This seems like a potential plan of action for all women around the world to implement until men finally wake up and actually do something meaningful during these ridiculous summits which are supposed to create a safe future for our children.

With experience in the world of meteorology and climatology (communications officer for the World Meteorological Organization) and in making some of their complexities more palatable for a wider audience, my intention with this blog is to deep dive into the world of climate change, to promote more understanding, more discussion, more urgency, and seek out more practical solutions. I will be publishing original content 2–3 times a week. Please feel free to share and comment. I know that climate change remains a controversial subject for some but, in the end, I’m working to be positive so if you disagree, which is your right, keep it polite and try to back up your opinions with verifiable facts.

Thanks.