Two Important Fatherly Prayers

And how they change your parenting

It is no mystery that parenting is a hard business. Often it drives us to our knees. We love our children and we want what is best for them, but we need some real help!

I have found myself on my knees as a father way more than when I was only responsible for myself. This is a good thing and it has changed me. I want to share with you two parental prayers all dads should have on repeat. I also want to show you how praying these prayers can change the way you parent.

1. Father, forgive them

When the days of feasting had completed their cycle, Job would send and consecrate them, rising up early in the morning and offering burnt offerings according to the number of them all; for Job said, “Perhaps my sons have sinned and cursed God in their hearts.” Thus Job did continually. (Job 1:5, NASB)

By this point we have all determined our children have a sin problem, right? Not only do we know all have sinned, but we have seen clear evidence of it in our children. And our children have highlighted the evidence of it in our own hearts as well.

Job took upon himself a personal responsibility to bring the sins of his children before the Lord. He even made provisional sacrifices just in case there was something he was not aware of.

This is one important way for us dads to pray. We ought to cry out to God to forgive us and our children. Yes, their personal repentance is necessary for salvation. But interceding for them in this way still has profound effects.

It changes our perspective

When we pray in this way it forces us to remember our children are sinners in need of a savior. Our focus is shifted from temporary to eternal. When we shift to that perspective we will stop shooting for behavior modification. Our goal will be deeper than that. We will aim for the salvation of our children through faith in Christ.

A father who prays regularly in this way understands his children need a changed heart. They don’t need to simply stop doing wrong. They need a new heart that desires to do right.

Fathers, if you pray this prayer regularly you will begin to catch yourself speaking to the hearts of your children, not just to their activity.

It reminds us that we are not their greatest moral authority

If we are pleading for God to forgive them then we are asking for something only He has the authority to do. When we pray, “Father, forgive them,” we are teaching ourselves to use our God-given authority to point our children to His ultimate authority.

This does something great for our children as well. What happens if my son grows up believing I am his ultimate authority? When he leaves my house he leaves my authority. He then becomes an authority of his own. My son needs to learn there is an eternal authority under which we all must live. And none of us ever leave that authority.

2. I don’t know what to do

We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you. (2 Chronicles 20:12b, ESV)

This one hurts to pray, I know. This is also a prayer I personally know all too well. Dads, let’s be honest. We like to be the hero. When something is broken my boys will confidently say, “Daddy fix it.” It’s music to my ears. I feel a sense of pride rising up within because in that moment I am the hero. That’s what makes this prayer sting. I can fix a Mickey Clubhouse all day long, but some of the most important things I can’t fix. I can’t fix their hearts. Many times they are sad about things I cannot fix.

As much as I like to be the hero on the white horse, I have to face reality. There is only one, true white horse rider and it’s not me (Revelation 6:1–2).

When we pray this prayer we admit our helplessness and surrender to God. This prayer also has a profound effect on our hearts.

It moves us out of the way

When you don’t know how to fix the problem the best thing to do is contact someone who does. It just makes sense. After contacting that person you step out of the way and let them do their job. We should do this in our prayers. It is actually very liberating. When we don’t know what to do concerning our children, the best thing we can do is get out of the way.

Typically, when you try to fix something you don’t know how to fix it ends up being more profoundly broken, and you end up being profoundly frustrated. There is one who does know what to do and we need to trust Him.

If you are already interceding in these ways for your children, that’s great! Press on! If not, there is no better time to start than now.