Turn Your Stumbling Blocks Into Stepping Stones to Success

The trick in life is to turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones for success. It’s the best alchemy!

I have come to believe that all of us should be alchemists in life and transmute our suffering, struggles, and sorrows into success.

This is what turning setbacks into comebacks is all about and also what true resilience is about.

It's one of the best things you can ever do for yourself and it will also inspire those around you to be alchemists.

Being an alchemist enables you to rise from the ashes of life like the phoenix and come back stronger than ever.

Be a victor, not a victim in life

Too many people are victims in life run by their sad stories filled with disappointments and setbacks.

It's an incredibly disempowering way to live life.

It reduces your enjoyment of life and overall functionality.

I made a commitment many years ago I would be a victor, not a victim in life no matter what happened to me.

So far I have kept this commitment.

I encourage you to make such a commitment and stick to it.

Alchemy of life

Alchemists are the victors not the victims of life.

So how exactly do you be an alchemist and transform and transmute your stumbling blocks into stepping stones for success?

Glad you asked!

By the following transmutation and transformation occurs:

Pain into Power

Fears into Focus

Difficulty into Determination

Adversity into Advantage

Struggle into Success

Suffering into Strength

Setbacks into Comebacks

Heartbreak into Healing

Trials into Trails of growth

This is what true alchemy is all about but only a few people will attempt it.

Most people prefer to be victims and stay stuck in their stories.

It takes guts and courage to be an alchemist and many are not prepared to step up and do the work or just lack the confidence and direction.

The dark night of the soul

Your stumbling blocks especially your most difficult ones often form part of the dark night of the soul.

Just like the common cold, we will all face a dark night of the soul eventually.

There’s no escaping it.

Often you’ll go through many, not just one.

But it's how you handle it and what you do after that makes all the difference.

You can either let it destroy you or come out stronger and be reborn.

Your biggest obstacles, boulders, mountains, and challenges that shake you to the core are the dark night of the soul.

Eckhart Tolle, author of the bestselling book ‘The Power of Now’ describes the dark night of the soul as a kind of death in which you die & are reborn.

Whatever way you describe it, you will face one.

Perhaps you are going through a dark night of the soul right now.

I am with my mum currently battling stage 4 colon cancer.

It is an extremely challenging and difficult time in my life but I am staying strong and encouraging her to do the same.

I am using this time to grow and be an alchemist and turn this stumbling block into a stepping stone for success.

I am doing this by deepening my faith in God, turning to my inner strength, and focusing on all the positives in my life.

Perhaps your dark night of the soul is a relationship breakdown, money problems, an addiction, work issues, or even an existential crisis?

Whatever it is hang in there and stay strong and know that this stumbling block can be transformed into a stepping stone for success.

Having faith, having support, engaging in activities that you enjoy, walks in nature, self-reflection, and just resting go a long way in helping you.

Questions to ask yourself

It helps to take a pause and ask yourself the following questions when you are facing a stumbling block or several for that matter:

• What is this here to teach me? (find the lesson, not just the mess)
• How can I find meaning and purpose in this no matter how tragic or even evil? ( Learn from Viktor Frankl who found meaning in suffering).
• How can I become a better person through it? (be of service, be kinder, compassionate, humble, etc)
• What have other people done in similar situations? (read stories of inspiring people that have defied the odds)

A step at a time, a day at a time

The above questions take time to answer and depending on your stumbling block or blocks may take a while and that's perfectly okay!

You may want to seek professional help from someone like a counselor or a psychologist that can further assist you with it.

There is no shame in asking for help.

In fact, it takes courage and guts to do so.

It can often be one of the best things you’ll ever do for yourself.

Just be sure you get someone you connect with, who understands you, is empathetic and makes you feel seen and heard.

Understand that this process of transformation and transmutation happens a step at a time, a day at a time.

It can’t be rushed.

One day you’ll look in the mirror and see a totally brand new person — a stronger, more self-aware, more mature, and resilient person.

The phoenix will have arisen out of the ashes!

A new and better you emerges

Although stumbling blocks are never pleasant experiences and given a choice we would avoid them like COVID they do serve us.

The truth of the matter is that they shape us and make us who we are.

It's the dark times, not the light times that give us our greatest growth and strength and enable us to become a new and better version of ourselves.

Just think now of your stumbling blocks and how they shaped and changed you for the better in the long term.

They might have been extremely hard and painful but you got through it and here you are.

Many years ago a lady told me, “Your trials make you who you are in life.”

Now as my older self, I can see the truth in this statement.

My own stumbling blocks

Aside from my mum’s current stage 4 colon cancer, I have had many stumbling blocks in my life.

But I've thankfully managed to transform them into stepping stones for success and even growth.

Know that you can too no matter your situation or circumstances.

You just need to believe you can and then do it.

Nothing more to it! Dont go making it complicated for yourself.

Here are some of my stumbling blocks and how I turned them into stepping stones for success and overall growth:

My father’s abuse & alcoholism into a strong code of conduct to guide me

Lack of a positive father figure into seeking good male role models

Parents that didn’t love each other into believing in true love

A stagnant & non stimulating home environment into a love of learning

Generational trauma into writing a new script for my family

Feeling lost into feeling guided by purpose and a vision

Being bullied into standing up for myself and others

I can honestly say that these experiences and others wounded me deeply but didn't break me as I didn't allow them to.

They left their mark on me but they awakened the giant within me which has made me stronger and more resilient.

I wouldn't be the Sandra I am today without them.

I now realize that they were essential in helping me become the person I am.

Realize that this applies to you too no matter how different your stumbling blocks are. The same principle is at work here.

Final thoughts

Be an alchemist in life and turn your stumbling blocks into stepping stones for success and overall growth.

This way you’ll never be a victim in life.

You’ll be a victor.

Life will be more enjoyable and interesting too.

Alchemists have more fun and it has nothing to do with magical formulas and wearing big pointed hats.

It has everything to do with living life the best you can and rising above adversity and challenges.

This type of alchemy should be taught in schools.

To Alchemy & Creating a Better You,

Sandra D

Free resources to help you: (not affiliate links)

Book — Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow

Book — Dark Night of the Soul: A Guide to Finding Your Way Through Life’s Ordeals

Book — When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times

For those who live in Australia

Lifeline — 13 11 14

Grief Hotline — 1300 845 745