Trying Adultery on For Size
Not Starting an Affair
Some would-be cheaters came to r/adultery to try it on for size before taking the plunge.
NoFixing posts, “I couldn’t do it. I guess morally it just felt wrong and I couldn’t go through with it. My heart is sad for even trying. The funny thing is, I could cheat. I am 164 lbs., 10% BF (body fat) and I’m above average in looks. I am charming with new people so I could pump and dump easily.”
Oh, this guy is a winner. I’m sure he could get laid in a minute. That pump and dump line just makes me want to rip through the screen and strangle him.
Because of this sub, you couldn’t pump and dump? Uh, you’re welcome? Awkward, really awkward. Good luck, bud.
He continues, “Thank you to this sub. It gave me a healthy dose of reality to read everyone’s stories. The truth is grim and dirty.”
We are a grim and dirty bunch, huh? I would objectively say that yes, we are. But we are also funny, open and joyful. Being a cheater is a bundle of contradictions. We are more than one “mistake” or “two or three” or a lifetime of wrongdoing.
“While your body might be objectively physically attractive, your post makes you unattractive in my opinion. That being said, well done on you for choosing to stay faithful. Best of luck with everything,” responds one Redditor.
NoFixing responds, “I never blamed the sub for my inability to have an affair. On the contrary, I blamed myself and my own moral standing for my shortcomings.”
Oh, I can’t wait to read the responses.
Cue the popcorn emoji.
The r/adultery community is not taking this in stride. We know we are morally deficient. We just don’t need a “holier than thou” poster bringing it up.
“Just fix things at home,” I write.
Spare us. Please. We don’t need your guilt trip on our adultery highway. We’ve all started down this path for reasons.
Everyone thinks their situation is unique. It’s not.
She doesn’t look at me, he doesn’t touch me anymore. Or, I’m so bored. The duty sex is killing me. Or, I need the thrills. It’s such a rush.
Yeah, we know.
Adulterers are in it for the long haul, baby. No turning back.
NoFixing unwisely continues, “I wish I could just fix things at home. I have tried for over ten years to fix things at home, to fix me for her, to be a better man for her, and finally to be a better man for me (fix myself). Endless marriage counseling and counseling on my own. I have lost hope, but you are right, I cannot undo an affair.”
Nope. There’s no undo button.
But I don’t need one.
You may have lost hope but I am finding mine. In r/adultery, in my sexuality, in my affair partners, and in myself. Hope after many years of having none.
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