Trapped at Home? Putting Mental Health and Self Care First
Tough time tactics
Politics. Covid 19. The economy. Most of what’s going on leaves us feeling powerless. It’s like we we can’t do a thing. Just a leaf on the wind. Not the good, Browncoat kind of leaf from a Firefly pilot. More like one that dies in the fall and lies on the lawn until it gets raked or covered with snow.
Going into a winter where we face potential shutdowns, restricted services and social distancing is scary and stressful. Most people feel cooped up and depressed at this time of year already. With so much going on and stress spiraling out of control, it helps to think about how to stay mentally healthy.
Sometimes the best thing we can do is make sure we stay on top of our own mental state. That way, not only will we help ourselves, we can be there for anyone else in our circle when they start circling the drain.
What can you control?
We always have the chance to affect what we’re thinking about. All we need is some sort of framework to get us just a little more positive. We don’t need to reinvent the wheel, all of the tools we need we already have.
Why not make a little list of priorities to keep you focused?
Start with a pen and paper, or any electronic device that you can make a list on. Just a few items to think about, a few choices to make. Don’t make this complicated, it’s not an office report or anything. It’s for you.
I’m asking you to actually chose what kind of outcome you would like from extra time at home. In order to chose, you need to make some kind of a mark on the universe. Just reading and thinking vaguely about it doesn’t count. The easiest way is to scribble it down on a notepad.
Got something to write with? Go get it! I can wait all day.
Decide what you want
Make a quick list of priorities for yourself. And don’t make it too big. Pick two or three things to enjoy and work on. Some interests or goals that will have you spending time and feeling productive. Write them down to show your subconscious mind what’s up.
Don’t try to go straight from zero to Michelangelo hero
Leave the life altering changes for later. It’s a lot better to start with small things that you can actually consistently take on. This will help keep you on top of things instead of feeling overwhelmed.
For example, if you want to work on your art, choose drawing a bit every day. Don’t try to go straight from zero to Michelangelo hero. Leave the Sistine Chapel alone for now and do a few simple watercolors. Decide to get one good doodle every day.
If you want to try some new cooking ideas and recipes, don’t bake all the things in the same week. Spread it out and have fun with it.
Here’s my list:
- Write every day
- Keep the kitchen clean
- Use Duolingo to practice Spanish every day
- Run three times a week
There’s 40 other things I could put on here, but I just can’t do it all. That might lead me to giving up- it’s overwhelming to have so many things, so I won’t do any.
You can always add to your list later if you want to. No need to build Rome today, spread the Rome over a couple weeks.
Decide what you want to limit
Are there things that you know you might do which lead to sadness? Maybe you want to make sure you don’t just sit around Doomscrolling. Some people think their consumption of various substances like sugar, potato chips or alcohol needs to be better managed, because they know how it got out of control earlier this year. You know what your weakness is, the thing you should do less of.
Write these down. And beside them, put a couple ways that you could keep a lid on things. If you’re a Doomscroller (that’s Me!) then think about deleting your news source or app right off your phone. That’s why Farcebook no longer lives in my electronics. I can still go to the site using a web browser, but it’s just a little less convenient.
If snacks are your kryptonite, vow to buy smaller serving sizes or something healthy to replace them.
Do you feel like you waste too much time in any activity? Then work on doing a little less of it by substituting in one of your three items off the priority list. Don’t try to cut Netflix out, just work on your priority of doodling first and then chill after.
Keep a routine
I’m laid off. Again. So I know what it’s like to be faced with all of those mornings and nowhere to be. It’s so darn disheartening. Not only is income limited, but the tendency is to feel like sleeping in, and then being upset about “wasting” time.
That’s where our superhero, The Routine, jumps in to save the day! With a just a few minor changes, it keeps us feeling like we have some solidity to life.
Pick a time you can get up. Try to eat lunch at your customary lunch time. Make supper and gather anyone else in the place up at suppertime. Set a bedtime and try to stick to it. Put in board game night or any other fun activity you can plan ahead of time.
A routine does a bunch to keep your mind healthy. It keeps us from lying around all purposeless and sad. It gives us things to look forward to, like eating with the significant other or playing an online game with distant friends.
Routine also lets us have a sleeping schedule, and that means we will get more rest. Super important for the mental health.
Friends and family
Don’t just sit around isolated. Call a friend, or text them daily. Spend time to contact people.
I already mentioned remote board game night. Video chat isn’t just for working from home. We use it to keep in contact with one son in Australia, one son in Vancouver, British Columbia, and our daughter in Edmonton, Alberta. Anyone with access to the internet can share with their friends or family.
Keep the lines of communication open. This isn’t just for your well being. It also lifts everyone else. You never know how much good a simple “Hi, how are you?” text can do.
Get help
If you think you’re in trouble, please don’t wait. There’s always someone who cares and wants to talk to you.
Any time you are feeling down and edging toward depression, please reach out. Call a friend or family member. If there’s no one close that can help you, check online for help lines in your local area. In Canada, you can contact Crisis Services Canada.
Thanks for reading! Here’s another couple stories that I think you’ll like: