Top 10 Hints You’ve Put On Weight

Spoken from experience

After a couple years of intensive social media training, I’ve learned that intellectual stuff is overrated.

Far more important is a helpful post like this one outlining some so-called life hacks.

With that in mind, here are 10 hints that you might have put on a touch of weight.

10

You get short of breath when you tie your shoes.

9

You claim that you wear sweatpants because they’re fashionable.

8

Someone politely suggests that you put something on over that T-shirt.

7

You blame your extra-snug clothes on the pesky dryer.

6

You’re on a first-name basis with the guys at the drive-thru.

5

Your profile view ain’t the most flattering.

4

You conveniently forget to tuck in your shirts.

3

You take to labeling your meals as mere snacks.

2

In fact, you find that sticking to three eating sessions infringes upon your freedom. (It’s America dammit!)

1

Your buddies prefer to call you fatty.

And the last life hack: Don’t fret about your weight — just grab yourself some cheesecake and relax!