‘Tools For Sanity’ By Kiran Trace

How life is supposed to be lived

Imagine you are born blind.

You would largely rely on your sense of touch to create the ‘imagery’ needed to navigate the world. You will use your tactile perception to understand the concept of space and the dimensions of objects around you and use this spatial information to construct representations of the world.

You would be able to identify a wooden table from the hard, grainy surface and picture its height, width, and depth by running your fingers around the edges. If you are particularly proficient, you might even be able to tell apart mahogany from satinwood.

But what you will not be able to tell is if the table has a neutral grey wash stain or a dramatic cherry red undertone. And you most certainly will be baffled if someone were to describe it in terms of luster, gloss, sheen, or glaze.

Not that you were instead seeing vast darkness or the color black when you were looking at the table, either. No, because then that would be like asking a sighted person if they see black in the place of radio waves or infrared.

You don’t ‘see’ because you are simply unaware of the concept called sight.

It is similar to trying to use your toes to read the markings on the inside of your shoe. It is not that your toes are having momentary trouble perceiving light or the space is too tight that it is totally dark; it is not even a question of whether you can or cannot. You simply don’t.

You lack the sense of sight, and you don’t have a reference to know what you are missing.

And that’s exactly how I felt when I read Kiran Trace’s Tools for Sanity.

This book, along with Kiran’s Youtube videos, was one mindblowing read that had me swiping page after page in absolute awe and honest chagrin that made me go, “why is my dumb self failing to see this!”.

Skewed first impression

My first introduction to Kiran Trace came through her interview with Rick Archer on Buddha at the Gas Pump, an online filling station that is an amazing collection of ‘conversations with “Ordinary” Spiritually Awakening People.’

Upon seeing her overmuch enthusiastic and boisterous persona, a big chunk of me was keen on brushing her off as superfluous.

My preconditioned, judgemental self presumed that awakened people naturally have a quiet, demure air about them, but, dear me, have I been rudely proven wrong! Maybe deservingly so because it only seems fair that when my fundamental understanding of enlightenment gets turned around, my presumptions about the people who experience it follow suit.

What the book is all about

Kiran Trace’s Tools for Sanity is about her personal experience of sudden awakening that transformed her into her true nature.

It also expands on her experience by providing self-reflection tools for anyone eager to see themselves through a different lens and alchemize patterns of self-destruction to give way to effortlessness and ease in living.

Kiran’s experience

Kiran Trace imploded into her awakening in a blink-of-an-eye transformation that blew a fuse in her mind. It pushed her into quietness, making everything around her appear as formless energy instead of definite objects.

Lucky would seem those who spontaneously slip into enlightenment without any conscious effort, pain, or struggle. But apparently, it is not fun to become disengaged from one’s identity and be forced into an indefinite space of jittery atoms. It is disorienting to be abruptly robbed of any memories or identities and cast away into nothingness.

But for Kiran Trace, this awakening stripped her of the filter called the mind that is responsible for dramas and stories and enabled her to witness life, self, and others from a bedrock point of pure consciousness.

Here’s my takeaway from this book

Life, down at the level of its foundation, is like a clear glass suspended in zero gravity — unambiguous, straightforward, and effortless.

But we have muddied it with our unnecessary thoughts, with layers and layers of ‘living,’ and with our should’ve and could have that stand in the way of allowing life to unfold in the manner it was meant to be.

This vast, infinite intelligence has figured out our life down to every step in order for us to have a blissed-out, effortless living like a river flowing downstream. But we challenge this benevolence by beating against the current to swim upstream with our trying-to-live mindset.

Life says, “Don’t thrash around, don’t gasp, don’t struggle to live… Just trust me to float you to the surface and take you where you want to go.”

Is life really that simple?

Does the indifferent universe that cares not about what we want but executes only what fits its grand inclusive design actually give a hoot to our heart’s desires and prayers?

Really?

The answer is both yes and no.

The truth that rests in this moment

There is an exceptionally simple line from Kiran Trace’s interview that is the key —

“It is only as big as this moment.”

Kiran Trace

Every moment has a fundamental “truth” or authenticity to it.

• When we quiet our minds of the noises, stories, and conditioning and narrow down our awareness to this one moment,
• When we accept whatever arises there without any judgment, even if it is anger, frustration, or regret, while fully welcoming our true self with what Kiran calls a “delicious yes,”

then we are in perfect alignment with what is, what should be, and what could ever be.

And once we learn to identify our “yes” in every moment, that deep instinctive feeling in the gut as to what is right, we are then pulled into life’s forward current where everything queues up in the best possible manner.

“When something feels very delicious, like a deep yes, that is life whispering instructions to you of what the next step is. You cannot possibly calculate all the details that would have to line up for any circumstance to unfold…life does that. Your part in this flow is to listen for the most obvious step, what feels like the most delicious thing to do in this moment.”

Kiran Trace

But this is not about giving in to our spoilt self and claiming any whims and fancies to be the true feeling that arises in the moment.

It is much finer than that.

The “yes” is a visceral sense of simply identifying what is already true for us in that moment.

We don’t have to do anything that requires external effort.

We don’t have to be the goody spiritual kind who finds a silver lining in even shitty scenarios. We are not required to repeat empty positive reinforcements to manifest things. We certainly don’t have to pray our hearts out because all of that requires effort.

We should simply be aware of our true self in the moment and accept whatever presents itself.

What about the dire consequences of doing whatever arises in the true moment?

What if your moment says, “take the hour off for a zen walk in the park,” but your boss is expecting the slide deck by noon?

The key point here is that our true “yes” is not a jail-free card but an awareness about what is real in this moment.

And it turns out that our “true moment” will never be in conflict with anyone or anything around us because when we learn to stand in our true “yes,” we are no longer a separate self but “The One.” We are Zen, and we are home.

The universe wants everyone to stand in their “zen” every moment. And because of that, our true “yes” will align everyone and everything around us in a way that we cannot logically comprehend.

Maybe something would prompt your boss to postpone the meeting, or the zen walk would’ve given you a creative breakthrough that positively affects your presentation in a manner that you wouldn’t have thought of otherwise.

It just works out. Like flipping one piece of an interlocking puzzle and seeing all the other pieces automatically fit in place.

It is as if the universe is running an advanced computation to keep everyone in consideration and constantly recalculates its moves to account for whatever resistance we come up with to interrupt its flow, both individually and collectively.

A fitting challenge to an astounding entity.

The universe does care, provided we honestly know what is good for us. It’s also a reassuring thought that we are not alone in our decisions but steadfastly watched over by an entire universe that looks out for us every step of the way.

Tap into the universe’s flow and be assured of home.

The what-if scenario

Let’s just say that I manage to find the frequency of my true yes and practice standing in it consciously.

Let’s say that every one of us manages to calm down from whatever it is that is making us run around like a headless chicken, overcome our collective conditioning, and stand in our true present moment consciously.

What happens, then?

What happens when after all of its complex calculations and simplifications, the universe’s grand equation finally comes down to the “equals” sign?

Guess we would never know.

‘The One’ might, but we, as separate selves, would never know.

If you are plotted anywhere near me on the spiritual graph or if you find my journey relatable, please follow me for more rants, raves, and reflections.