Today’s Rant No. 21: Southern California Edition

• I was born and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area and lived there for more than 30 years before my wife, Kay, and I moved to Southern California in 2019. Before then, I had learned everything I knew about SoCal from three sources: the film “Die Hard” (yes, it is a Christmas movie), the television show “24” (Kiefer Sutherland is my favorite actor), and the song “Westside” (it had been popular in the late 1990s).
• “24” is my favorite show. In each season, federal agent Jack Bauer (Sutherland) is tasked with thwarting terrorist attacks in Los Angeles. Sutherland won a Primetime Emmy Award (2006) and Golden Globe Award (2002) for the role. The irony is almost nobody who lives in Los Angeles County has heard of the show. Seriously. Instead of being grateful to Bauer for saving their lives, they pretend he had never existed. That would be equivalent to visiting Anaheim but not liking Mickey Mouse. Or buying a Los Angeles Lakers T-shirt but not liking Kobe Bryant. Or buying a Tesla car but not liking Elon … okay, not a good example there. But you get the point.
• While most folks think of NWA and Tupac when the topics of “SoCal” and “music” are mentioned, TQ’s “Westside” always does it for me. I still love it, even 24 years after its release. Might be too much to refer to it as my personal anthem, but it would certainly make my list of top five favorite R&B hits. TQ runs a media business in Las Vegas nowadays, where he covers their local sport teams. I have chatted with him a few times via Instagram, and he seems like a personable guy.
• If you know Los Angeles County, then you know Griffith Park, undoubtedly my favorite local hiking spot. It has a little bit of everything — grassy areas of picnics, a merry-go-round, and even a small train for the family to enjoy. John Anson Ford Park in Bell Gardens is a close second with its cute duck pond. The Los Angeles River is also great for running, jogging, and walking. It runs for almost 50 miles through the county, from the San Fernando Valley to Long Beach. It has been used in tons of films. I practically expect to see Arnold Schwarzenegger and Edward Furlong whizzing by me on a motorcycle with an angry Robert Patrick driving a fiery big rig behind them every time I walk along the river.
• A shoutout to Tam’s Burgers in Huntington Park and Roscoe’s House of Chicken and Waffles in Inglewood for providing me with food my first two days as a SoCal resident. Rapper Snoop Dogg would likely approve of my endorsement since Roscoe’s is one of his favorite restaurants. Speaking of favorites, Yoshinoya is one of my go-to places for lunch. It is the first Japanese fast-food chain I had ever visited. It only exists in SoCal, but I feel like a chain established in a similar vein would be equally as profitable in the Bay Area. (Hello, San Francsico? Oakland? San Jose?) Speaking of fast-food chains, Rally’s fries are undoubtedly the best I have ever eaten. End of report. Elvis has left the building. Don’t come at me, bro.
• I love the weather in SoCal. Warm and sunny 9–10 months out of the year. After all, nothing says Thanksgiving like wearing shorts and a T-shirt in 75-degree weather while watching the Detroit Lions lose on television.
• Despite SoCal’s notorious reputation for having non-stop traffic congestion, driving in the area is not all that bad. In fact, I would rather drive in SoCal than Northern California, which has the opposite problem of everyone needing to drive 90 miles per hour on freeways. Not sure which is worse — the stress from being stuck in traffic all day in SoCal or the stress of feeling like you are stuck in a never-ending “Fast and the Furious” film in NorCal. Almost like asking, would you rather be punched in the stomach or face? Would you rather vomit or have diarrhea? Would you rather date Khloe Kardashian or Tristan Thompson? Lose-lose situations.
• Yet, the one thing SoCal does not have: good sport teams. My heart forever belongs to the Golden State Warriors, Las Vegas (formerly Oakland) Raiders, and Oakland Athletics. I have warmed up to the Los Angeles Dodgers, even though they had defeated the A’s in the 1988 World Series. I dislike the Los Angeles Lakers, but can still respect their 17 championship victories, tied with the Boston Celtics for the most in NBA history. Then, you have the Los Angeles Angels … yup, not much to brag about there. The Angels are like the last cookie at the bottom of the box — broken, useless, and undesired.
• I love supporting small businesses. Their owners are some of the hardest working and most creative people I know. Kay and I recently did a pregnancy photoshoot at Griffith Park. Hence, I would like to thank Ivy at @ivy_ninet_portraits_ on Instagram for doing a fine job with our pictures.
• While part of my spirit forever belongs to NorCal, my heart belongs to SoCal. The past three years have been better than I could have expected. While moving 375 miles and starting anew is never easy, the life I have built with Kay and our son, Mateo, has been a dream come true. I have no regrets. And for that, I am eternally grateful.