To Learn Anything About Yourself, Forget Yourself
A tribute to your inner combat.
Creativity holds the power to make use of even our ugliest moments, our worst failings. The only rule is not to dismiss anything, but transform it playfully.
We don’t learn by focusing on ourselves. But through curiously engaging with our uncomfortable companions.
Rejection, fear, irritation. Ultimately all rooted in vulnerability.
They’re some of our greatest teachers and the most challenging sparring partners. Because they are within, we can’t escape them.
Rejection
Rejection can teach us a lot about authenticity. If you’re never questioned by others, you’ll never have to fight for who you are. You’ll never question yourself. And you’ll never learn to define your values and stand up for them.
Many times I wanted to die when others told me I’m wrong. I wanted to die when they didn’t approve of me. I wanted to die when any interaction was uncomfortable.
Only, I didn’t actually want to die. I was longing for sweet peace, love and harmony. It took me a while to understand the value of rejection.
Fear
To me, fear is often rooted in fear of the self.
The most challenging journey you can take is the inner journey. It’s a vast land of infinite universes and realities. The most courageous things you can do, are to live according to your own truth, to show it to the world and explore it further. To confront your dark side and repressed emotions. To scan your inner and outer boundaries. And if the conditions are allowing it, to take tiny steps across the borders.
Just like any other exploration, the inner journey calls for certain resources. Proper equipment, accurate information, knowledge, willpower, strength, confidence, preparation and training.
No one will be able to tell you if what you’re going through is true or a delusion. You are completely left alone to determine whether your inner and outer perceptions are correct or deceitful.
It’s our very own decision whose judgment to trust.
And it’s our decision if we’re ready to face our fears, become paralyzed or catalyzed by them.
Irritation
To deal with your irritation, you will have to learn to stretch your mind. Perpetually allow for new ideas, views, thoughts, feelings and attitudes. Become and stay open, lucid. Fall in love with failing. Stay clear of petty minds.
Your perception, reasoning and sensibility will change over the years. And sometimes within seconds. What’s been true one moment ago, becomes meaningless in another, and then vital again.
I know, we’ve been getting used to instant gratification. We become irritated if we don’t get immediate results and satisfaction from anything we do or say.
Trust in nature. Don’t rip immature fruits from your gardens. Give your wishes, actions, thoughts, epiphanies and experiences the time, space and nutrition they need to evolve.
Don’t let expectations rush you around or do things you don’t believe in. Follow your intuition, it’s often a more precise mentor than your analytic mind. It won’t show you the whole map at once, but the next step.
And that’s what it’s all about. Taking a step.
Accept the irritation life triggers within you. You choose what you want to be aware of, what you want to create, what you want to transform.
Vulnerability
Being vulnerable and failing are the best things you can do with your life.
Writing online is teaching me to put myself out there. I’ve only started publishing a few days ago. And already I received reactions to my words I could have never imagined. I’m feeling a shift taking place inside thanks to embracing my vulnerability.
Connections with people are starting to become more meaningful, as I share more. The more I allow myself to be vulnerable, the more I get out of life, the stronger I bond with people.
Once you talk about things, they become real. We can only discuss what we know is there. If we keep our vulnerabilities to ourselves, we can’t form our truth.
Trust in the process. You will ultimately achieve freedom, once you start to creatively and sincerely collaborate with your shadows.
