To Have an Interesting Life, Embrace Being Ordinary

My generation has a serious problem.

The big problem of my generation is boredom.

However, it’s not the presence of it that’s the problem. Rather, it's the absence of boredom.

Instead of embracing boredom for what it is — a natural way of life for most beings — we constantly run away: consuming more content and doing more things.

We do this in futile attempts of “having an interesting life.” You know, the one you see on Instagram: with yachts, sandy beaches, mojitos, giving keynotes in front of an audience of thousands, and making millions in blog ad revenue.

Every time we feel stable, we assume that something is off. Perhaps we need to start a video blog. Perhaps we need to travel the world. Perhaps we need to start a business, set a new unreachable goal, and fill our nights with endless partying. Youth is wasted on the young, isn’t that what they say?

If this rings a bell, I’ve got bad news for you: desperately wanting an interesting life is what’s stopping us from actually living one.

What’s the difference between someone young and stupid and someone mature and wise? It’s the ability to withstand boredom.

The immature “enfant terrible” feel bad about looking boring on the outside. They live by outer scorecards, and they care what people think.

Whereas people who have reached harmony in their lives don’t worry about their lives being uninteresting. They follow their true interests — and that makes them interesting.

As the legendary John Gardener once said, “Everyone wants to be interesting. But the key to being interesting is actually to be interested.”

People who have inner harmony don’t focus at all on making their lives anything. They care about making stuff and getting things done — in the external world. They care about something else besides themselves. Be it a book, a blog, or a business.

The lives of people who have found themselves, you might discover, are extremely simple. Almost monk-like. And not that interesting.

A writer who is so absorbed in getting their story done will compromise everything — their friendships, going out, luxuries, vacations — all in favor of writing two words: “THE END.”

An entrepreneur who wants to get his venture off the ground will sacrifice everything, including his own lifestyle, just for the sake of keeping the company alive.

On the other end of the spectrum: focusing too much on making your life fun is a form of procrastination. It’s laziness in disguise. On the outside, you seem great — endless travels, new relationships, fun activities. You can have the craziest lifestyle on the planet, but if you lack the Important Thing, you won’t ever be fulfilled.

What’s the Important Thing?

Your work.

I am not even talking about something that makes money. Rather, I am talking about something that you do for yourself. Your calling, purpose, passion, what have you. Until you find that, you won’t feel fulfilled. I know this from experience.

Over the past few years, I’ve become an expert at running away from myself. For many years, I wanted to make my life “interesting.” I pretended to have it all figured out and lived a life that more resembled a roller coaster than anything else. Most of my friends envied me. But I envied them — because I knew that while their lives were more boring on the outside (less partying, less travel, less crazy relationships), they had more meaning and control. And I desperately lacked both.

All I needed was to start doing the Important Thing.

But it’s not like it’s easy.

Many people assume that once you find what you’re passionate about, things become easy-cheesy. They don’t.

Just because you’re passionate about writing doesn’t make writing fun 100% of the time. It sure doesn’t make writing easy all the time too. Most of the time, you’ll have to fight procrastination and push yourself with force and discipline. The same goes for all other activities.

Passion gives you nothing. Nothing except a reason to keep going when it gets really hard.

I used to feel guilty for being bored. I guess I was that enfant terrible. I guess I still am.

And like many people in my generation, I had that feeling: “OMG, that dude on Instagram is traveling all around the world and making video blogs! What am I doing with my life?!”

Now I am slowly learning that boredom shouldn’t be escaped but rather embraced.

It’s cool to say, “Yeah, I work most of the day, then I work out, have dinner, and go to sleep. Yup, my life is pretty ordinary. And I like it.”

There are many benefits to being ordinary. The biggest one of all is that you can actually get shit done.

When you’re too busy working on making your life interesting, you don’t have any time or energy actually to work on the projects you dream about. Whereas when your life resembles The Groundhog Day, you have the luxury to think only about important things, relaxing into the routine.

Imagine how cool it would be: to not think about where to go today, or what to eat, but just following the natural rhythm of your life, focusing on doing your best work, deriving pleasure from your life as it is.

That’s maturity. And that’s how you get the best projects done. That’s how you make an impact.

The romance of constant partying and drinking and following the Muse on the other side of the planet is just that — a romance. Fiction. A lie.

So do yourself a favor: embrace boredom. Be ordinary. Focus on doing the work. Follow your true interests.

That’s how your life actually becomes interesting.