Summary

The website content presents a collection of satirical observations and anecdotes on contemporary societal issues, including vaccination, corporate policies, public health measures, interpersonal relationships, and political correctness.

Abstract

The article "Tidbits from the Land of Odds" offers a humorous and critical look at various societal quirks and controversies. It includes stories such as Emily's situation, where her unvaccinated status leads to a complex family dynamic and job termination, despite her desire to leave the company. The piece also comments on the inconsistency of public health practices, the impact of corporate vaccine mandates, and the absurdity of certain politically correct actions. The author uses these vignettes to highlight perceived ironies and contradictions in modern life, often with a dose of sarcasm and exasperation.

Opinions

The author views Emily's situation as an example of back-assward risk assessment, questioning the logic behind her parents' decision to avoid visiting her while exploring New York City's mass transit system.
The corporate policy that led to Emily's firing is criticized as a "Moronic Mandate," suggesting that the requirement for vaccination is unnecessary and overly intrusive, especially given Emily's desire to leave the job for personal reasons.
The author expresses frustration with the inconsistent use of masks at a social event, implying that such behavior undermines the purpose of wearing masks to prevent the spread of the coronavirus.
The relationship dynamics between Mick and Lauren are presented with a sense of irony, with Mick resenting Lauren for her financial stability, which the author seems to find ridiculous given their respective circumstances.
The author pokes fun at the radio edit of Nine Inch Nails' song "Closer," questioning the choice of words used to censor the explicit content.
The piece mocks the overreaction to the high school football team's name and the monogram on the track team jackets, framing these as examples of unnecessary political correctness.
The author defends a police officer who unintentionally sparked controversy with a message board statement that all lives matter, framing the subsequent apology as unwarranted.

Tidbits from the Land of Odds

REJECTED SUBMISSIONS: A sampler of wry observations

The shorties below were deemed to be vulgar, insipid, flippant, provocative, politically incorrect — or some combination thereof.

**Photo by Liam Burnett-Blue on Unsplash**

What’s wrong with this picture?

File this under: Back-assward Risk Assessment

My friend Emily and her husband and son are unvaccinated.

Emily’s vaccinated parents decline to visit because her mother’s immune system is severely compromised consequential to chemotherapy for ovarian cancer.

Emily has promised her parents — to no avail — that she and her family would wear masks throughout the visit.

Emily’s parents are presently staying with relatives in New York City, which they have been exploring via the mass transit system.

Approximately 2 million people ride the subway daily.

67.45% of New York’s population have been vaccinated.

I’ll let you do the math.

Coronaphobic Corporate Policy

File this under: Moronic Mandate

My friend Emily (above) has worked remotely for the past 20 months — she got fired yesterday because she isn’t vaccinated.

Her job sucks, so Emily wanted out anyway. She’d stayed only because she’d been planning to have another child, and the company provides comprehensive coverage to pregnant persons of all genders.

Half-Masked Madness

File this under: Don’t Bother

I attended a Christmas dinner-dance yesterday. One couple came wearing standard-issue disposable masks, which they proceeded to pull off-on-off-on-off throughout the evening.

Heads-up guys: the coronavirus doesn’t take mask breaks.

Game Over

File this under: Duh!

Mick: partially disabled consequential to a car crash, awaiting in vain a settlement, has neither income nor job prospects.

Lauren: disabled by Multiple Sclerosis, gets enough to live comfortably in her parents’ house but not enough to afford independent living, much less support boyfriend Mick.

Mick resents Lauren for prioritizing her financial security over their relationship.

Seriously???!!!

**Photo by Wolfgang Hasselmann on Unsplash**

Expletive Deleted

File this under: What the F …?

As heard on the radio: lyric from the song Closer, by Nine Inch Nails.

I wanna (bleep)uck you like an animal.

Hmmm … pluck?

But then why not just say “chicken” instead of “animal?”

I give up.

If you can f#(k!n& figure it out, let me know.

Team jacket monogram causes uproar

File this under: What the F …?

The PC Police in my city have decreed that our high school’s football team must divest itself of its name on the grounds that Red Raiders is offensive to Indi — oops! I mean Native Americ — sorry: Indigenous Peoples.

The hoopla triggered my memory of a controversial monogram imprinted on the jackets of the Track-and-Field team in the neighboring town of Wakefield. The team members, with the approval of their unwitting coach, came up with…

WTF!

Apology is Not in Order

File this under: Town Haunted by Phantom Offenses

Melrose Massachusetts Police Chief Michael Lyle apologized on behalf of an unnamed officer responsible for the roadway message board that drew ire from the P.C. Contingent. The offensive passage: The safety of all lives matter.

The officer claimed to have no political agenda; I have no cause to doubt him. More likely, he segued from a generic safety message to play off the tiresome soundbite: BLM and its contentious counterpart, ALM, are earworms more catching than the coronavirus.

Mind your own A’s and B’s if you will — -and you’d better — -but leave the officer out of it.