Yes. It is possible to thrive after depression.
We can thrive after our depression recedes, but it takes some radical self-acceptance and the understanding that recovery is a journey too.
by: E.B. Johnson
Depression is monster that can consume our lives and make it hard to function in the real world. When we suffer with depression, we often find ourselves feeling hopeless and isolated, spinning down a spiral of negative and self-destructive behaviors and beliefs that undermine our happiness and mental and physical wellbeing.
Sometimes, however, we are able to overcome this monster and come out standing on the other side of a recovery opportunity that is truly beautiful to behold. What we often don’t realize however, is that the process of thriving after depression is also a journey and process by which we have to overcome new challenges in order to create the contentment and fulfillment that we so desperately seek.
Depression takes it toll.
Depression is a life-destroying disease that not only corrupts our minds, but our bodies as well. There is a substantial amount of evidence that has shown that untreated depression can lead to stroke and coronary disease, and it can also lead to substantial sleep disturbances and weight gain, weight loss and general fatigue that affects everything from our work to our relationships.
Our depression can destroy us, and often takes the help of a licensed mental health professional to overcome, but when we do we can often be faced with a number of surprising new challenges that make recovery difficult. Coming out on the winning side of your depression is just the first step in a long journey that takes time and committment to master, as well as a radical dose of self-acceptance and compassion on every conscious (and unconscious) level.
The slow recede.
If you’re someone who’s struggled with depression for a long time, the slow recede of darkness can be a confusing and unsettling experience. At first, it may not seem like your depression is lifting at all, but over time the feeling becomes more noticeable. You start to feel less irritable, and then you start gaining interest in things again. While this new experience can be off-putting, it’s also exhilarating too (but that can bring with it its own set of anxieties).
Our depression takes time to lift, and it takes a lot of understanding and radical self-acceptance to walk confidently into the new abyss of happiness. As the layers of darkness begin to peel away, you’ll start to see that old-self again, and with it you’ll find that you have more energy, less overwhelm, and a better sense of concentration and self-image.
Things that hold us back.
According to a recent study, not only is it possible to recover from depression — it’s possible, too, to thrive and bloom in the soils of former-adversity. The study, published in the Psychiatry Research journal, found that there are concrete elements in our lives that can help us overcome depression, but there is also one damaging, yet commonly-utilized, element that can hold us back from recovering forever.
Though we are often told that “time heals all wounds” the study found that nothing could be further from the truth when it came to depression. In fact, the researchers found that time makes no difference at all in our ability to battle depression, and that it might — in fact — hold us back when we use time and space alone as a means for combating our darkness.
Handing over the responsibility for our healing to time is inherently lazy and reckless. If you truly want to overcome your depression, you have to take an active hand in manifesting the happiness you desperately need in your life. Whether you’ve been suffering for two years or ten, the pain won’t go away until you start getting real and take an active role in the play-out of your future.
Things that help us thrive.
When we’re suffering with depression, it can seem like there’s no end in sight. Nothing could be further from the truth, however, and the Psychiatry Research journal study helped to prove that.
There are concrete things that help us thrive in the wake of depression, and they start from things as small as one close friend and range all the way up shifting your entire life perspective. Depression is a monster, that rips apart every waking moment of our lives — but it can be defeated when we know what elements to cultivate in our life.
This recent study showed that support groups are one indicator of depression recovery. There are a number of other elements that helpful too. By learning how to control your thought patterns, embrace a newly-born sense of gratitude and making plans that you can start looking forward to, you can being to piece together a future in which you thrive rather than sink.
Simple ways to bloom after depression.
It’s important to point out here that severe, chronic depression can often not be treated by simply learning how to change your view of the world. Depression is a serious issue, with serious consequences, and it often takes the care of a medical professional to overcome. There are concrete steps you can take, however, to make your life more fertile ground for happiness — and this is how.
1. Give yourself space to recover
Depression zaps the life out of us and makes it hard to operate normally in the world at large. For this reason, we often experience a surge of energy after the release of depression and this can cause us to throw ourselves hastily into new projects, relationships or decisions that we didn’t feel capable of holding before.
The problem with this, however, is that — just like any major illness or injury — we need time to recover. Depression takes a serious toll on both our mental and physcial wellbeing, and those issues have to be addressed and allowed to heal before you take on more pressure, anxiety or stress (be it good or bad).
If you’re just coming out on the other side of serious depression, give yourself some time to recover. Let your emotions breathe, and allow yourself to deliberately feel and release in stages. We need to give our bodies and our minds time to process what’s just happened and what’s ahead. We can give them that time by giving them the space they need to get back to an even keel.
2. Celebrate your progress
Recovering from depression is incremental, as is learning how to thrive in the wake of seriously destructive thought patterns. Things take time, and sometimes our recovery happens slowly. If we want to stay on track and make sure we find our way back to lasting and authentic happiness, we have to start small and accept our mistakes and set-backs along the way.
Celebrate your progress — one day at a time — and take a little time each day to appreciate the steps you’ve taken (no matter how small) and the improvements you’ve intstituted. Zero in on your strengths and find what adds beauty or courage to your life and the new world you’re building around yourself. No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes. Those mistakes don’t define us, or our recovery, so we have to focus on the good and make that our mission.
It’s always easy to be critical. It’s always easy to focus on what you did wrong rather than what you did right. That’s the old you, though. The you that was sad and lonely and had nothing and no one. Have the courage to stand up for the new you and acknowledge each new and beneficial thing that adds color and passion to your life. Overcoming depression is one of the hardest things we can do. If you’ve managed to climb that mountain, give yourself a break and celebrate.
3. Make things easier on yourself
Once you’re ready to step back out into the world and resume your human-hood once again, you have to make things easier for yourself and give yourself the chance to thrive. Our depression — even when we think it’s gone — will always try to win us back with those comfortable thoughts of fear and isolation. You have to step away from those thoughts and you can do so by making the world around you a beautifully distracting one.
Take small steps. Don’t rush into big changes or big investments of your time. Choose a range of new activities, small in nature, and choose things that you know you’ll excel at so that you can bolster your confidence. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh and things that make you proud. Celebrate who you are and how far you’ve come, and make it harder for your depression to pull you back under by giving yourself a chance to thrive.
Before making any big choices or leaping into any unknowns, take a few minutes to breath first and consider yourself and your emotions. Take a single task at a time and don’t allow yourself to bite off more than you can chew. Treat yourself the way you would treat others and do your best for yourself first and them second. No one knows you like you do. Not your depression, not your mama; no one. Take the steps you need to take to protect yourself from a relapse and make things easier on yourself and your recovery process.
4. Rework your inner critic
Putting your life back together after a long bout of depression can feel a lot like building a business from the ground up. There’s a lot of anxiety about being back out in the big wide world in such a new and exposed way, and it can be hard to gain a footing as you attempt to attract the things and people back into your life that give it meaning. One of the critical pieces of thriving after depression is learning how to maser your inner critic, while focusing on a recovery that allows you to heal while you bloom.
Learn how to address that overly critical inner voice, and reprogram them into forces for good. Acknowledge each new and beneficial thing that you do each day, and focus on the things that you’re grateful for around. Slowly, you’ll be able to gain control of the negative thoughts that tell you that you aren’t good enough, and reshape them into more positive representations that help you to feel good and open up to the world and possibilities around you.
Battling depression is like running a marathon. It’s a long and exhausting process that has to be addressed in halves and quarters in order to overcome. While you may not finish first, or you may not end up with the exact result you wanted, what’s important is that you finished at all. Coming out on the other side of depression is just as difficult and worthy of respect as battling any terminal illness. Depression is hard. Overcoming it can be even harder. Celebrate and acknowledge how strong you actually are.
5. Don’t give up
What many people who overcome depression don’t tell you is that it is a never-ending battle. Just because you’ve come out on the other side of depression doesn’t mean it will never return. Our darkness stalks us, and it takes continuous commitment to keep it at bay. You have to be committed to your healing, and committed to the idea that you will never give up the fight. To give up is to slip back into the darkness, and that’s not something we can afford to do if we’re seeking to create happy and fulfilled lives.
Stick with your recovery and don’t give up or give in because you backstep or make a mistake. To err is human. It’s impossible to be perfect. Rome wasn’t built in a day and you won’t heal your depression in a day either. If you want to truly thrive in the wake of depression, accept that it’s a journey and commit to living that journey (and your truth) each and every day.
If you’re still struggling in the wake of your darkness, reach out to a mental health professional that can give you the help and encouragement you need to move forward. Likewise, you can find yourself a trusted accountability partner that motivates you and keeps you on the path to happiness. There’s no wrong way to keep yourself engaged and focused on healing. The only wrong decision is to give up just because this next stage of your life is a challenge. Give yourself the opportunity to thrive by never giving up on your own recovery. You owe it to yourself.
Putting it all together…
Thriving in the wake of depression is a challenging and uphill process that takes a lot of understanding and commitment to conquer. Just because we’ve come out on the other side of our battle with depression does not mean we will forever be free of its darkness. We have to make a commitment to our healing each and every day, and refuse to give in when things get challenging or we slip back into our old self-destructive habits. There are a number of ways we can foster these skills, but it takes a lot of courage and radical self-acceptance to get there.
If you’ve come out on the winning side of your depression, give yourself the time and space you need to recover before jumping into new opportunties or relationships. Keep your momentum going by celebrating your progress, no matter how small, and make things easier on yourself by slowly easing back into the things and situations that make you feel happy and fulfilled. Rework your inner critic and realize that recovery — like depression — is a process that is never-ending and never-perfected. Love yourself enough to never give up on your healing. No one deserves the pain and hopelessness that comes with depression. Prevent that darkness from permeating your life again by committing to thriving in the wake of the disease that stole your life. No one is the master of your happiness but you. Use that knowledge to bloom.
