Three Words to Help You Stay In The Zone

It's about accepting what is, letting go, and moving on.

I sat in my local rail station, waiting for a train to take me to Edinburgh airport, where I had a flight booked for Venice, Italy. The excitement and anticipation of going there had been building for a month since my colleague in the U.S. asked me to run a team-building workshop for his client.

All expenses paid. Not a bad gig.

I've never been to Venice, so I added three nights to the trip on my dime. Booked a lovely boutique hotel. Arranged a private water taxi from the airport. The whole bit.

The train was due in ten minutes.

I pulled out my phone, checked my email, and saw this: Very Urgent. "Hi, Don, Sorry to let you know in such a hurry, but we need to change our plan for next week's workshop. There was a meeting last night, and all corporate travel is canceled. So we'll have to do the workshop virtually now."

Wow. I froze. Stunned. Argggghhh!

Images of me smiling in the water taxi, hair blowing in the breeze, and zipping across the Venice Lagoon vanished. So did walking the canals, taking in the history and architecture of a city 1200 years old, and enjoying a cappuccino outside a picturesque cafe.

Gone like a good dream you can’t remember when you wake up.

What the heck? Nothing to do except go home, unpack and cancel all the flights, hotels, trains, and that water taxi. Damn.

Get into the zone and move on.

The zone — the place within us where we find flow, non-resistance, acceptance, resolution, and peace. When we're in the zone, we can think more clearly, act rationally, and resolve problems more easily.

The zone is the present moment, uncluttered, without noise about the past or the future.

But it's impossible to live in the zone when we resist what we can't control — like a customer choosing another supplier over us, lamenting endlessly about the promotion we didn't get, or being upset that we pulled a hamstring right before the big 10K we've been expecting to run.

We get back into the zone by letting go of and moving through any agitation, rumination, anger, and disappointment as quickly as possible. It's the wallowing, the lingering in the blues, that saps our energy and renders us unable to move forward.

But the truth is many of us get agitated, no matter how strong our mental and spiritual practices may be, because life dishes up plenty of surprises that lure us out of the zone. But the sooner we get back into the zone, the better off we are.

Agitation, frustration, anger, and disappointment are responses to something we didn't expect or want to happen. But, whatever set us off is now in the past.

The past never gets any better, no matter how much you think about it.

But the future can be way better. But not if we're stuck grinding our teeth about something we can't change.

If we want a better future, we need to be in the zone — the present moment.

The present moment is where a better future starts.

Three words can help us get over what we can't do anything about and into the zone where we can think straight and find peace and resolution.

So be it.

I got agitated the other day when the new carpet installation got boggled up. I could feel my blood pressure spike as I spoke to the carpet guy on the phone. Then, amid it all, I said those three words to myself, took a deep breath, and relaxed. I felt better and realized it would all work out — back in the zone I went.

Some dictionaries define so be it as acceptance and resignation.

Resignation is only for those who believe the world is out to get them. Not a healthy state of mind if you ask me.

I define so be it as acceptance and resolution. The resolution part is crucial. The dictionary defines resolution as being determined and purposeful.

Therefore, so be it means we accept what we can't change and focus on what's in our control.

And many times, if the challenge we face is overwhelming, the only thing we can control is our attitude — our mindset.

People that seek to live in the zone know a life of peace, success, and contentment starts with learning how to master the inner game — their mindset.

They find the zone by accepting what they can't change and being grateful for what they have —pretty small prices to pay for admission to the zone.

The best way to get good at getting in the zone is to practice with everyday challenges — the small stuff. Build your muscles, so you're ready when the tough stuff comes your way.

• Your flight was canceled. So be it. (Sort out a new one).
• The relationship with your co-worker has broken down, and you don't know why. So be it. (Ask them for an honest conversation).
• The economy is going into the toilet. So be it. (Figure out how to best manage your finances).

I'm not saying you'll walk around with a permanent smile when you're in the zone.

I'm saying that reminding yourself to let go of what you can't do anything about is the first step toward positive action, resolution, and peace.

So the next time you get agitated, try saying So, be it.

Accept, let go and move on.

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