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ady had some opinions about these relationships. I’m already rooting for two of these couples to last and two of them to give up.<figure id="9e83"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*NcbX0cB-17OOinYT"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@sharonmccutcheon?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Sharon McCutcheon</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure>I wasn’t sure at first about Iris and Keith. Iris is 27 years old and very religious, and she’s a virgin who has been saving herself for her husband. Keith is also very religious, but has not practiced abstinence. This has definitely created some tense moments between the two of them but all in all I really hope they go the distance. They both work in the nonprofit circuit with kids and just in general have a lot in common.They, as of episode nine, are the only couple who has not consummated their marriage. Which truthfully I think makes a lot of sense. Yes, Iris was saving her first sexual experience for her husband but she is still married to a person she has not known for a long time.Keith seems like a loving and confident man who is willing to learn and grow with his wife. I just hope that Iris feels the same way. Seeing as she audibly and physically cringes every time sex is brought up, I’m not sure yet.Amber and Matt are the couple I’ve been rooting for from the get go. They clicked right away, despite their near two foot height difference (she is 5'2" and he is 6'9"). They consummated their marriage on the second night of the honeymoon and Amber has been openly infatuated and attracted to her husband since the minute she walked down the aisle.Matt is a lot more reserved but still seems to be getting to the place where he loves Amber. He’s not as open or vulnerable with Amber as she is with him, but I think through communication and patience they could definitely get there.They’ve had a few bumps in the road, they’ve been big bumps. Matt is a professional basketball player who went pro overseas and has spent the last seven years travelling constantly. Amber made it clear that if he were to have to go overseas again this early into their marriage, it would be a deal breaker. Matt has said over and over that he has a “new business venture” starting up in Charlotte, but that he doesn’t know what might happen and he’s worried that he will have to go overseas again.He also went out one night to hang out with some friends, and didn’t come home for over 24 hours. He didn’t call or text Amber to tell him where he was or when he’d be home. When he finally did come back to their apartment, he said he just didn’t really think about it. This seemed like a red flag to me: It’s just common courtesy to let someone know where you’ll be. She hadn’t heard from him for over 24 hours. For all she knew he could have been dead.Regardless, I’m still rooting for them to make it work because they do seem to really like each other and they’ve clicked since the beginning.<figure id="2e8f"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*FL7Z9JfVy1svSNGF"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@photos_by_lanty?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Photos by Lanty</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure>Now as for Deonna and Greg, I don’t feel one way or the other about them. They seem like they’ve been married for ten years — but not in a good way. They don’t seem to really be into each other at all. Deonna’s whole schtick is that she’d been single for the last ten years

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because she was working on herself and her career. This is completely respectable and admirable. However, that does mean that for the last ten years she’s been incredibly independent and now has to learn what it means to be a partner.Greg, on the other hand, is a total sweetheart. I think he does love Deonna and he thinks she’s an angel on earth. All he does is compliment her — much to Deonna’s dismay for some reason — and try and be a better man for her. They haven’t had any major bumps in their marriage besides not having sex for nearly the entire first month. In my personal opinion, I think that’s totally fine. They’re strangers, they’re warming up to each other, and, again, Deonna has been single for ten years. It makes sense that she’s going to take her time before having sex.Greg just doesn’t seem as patient as Keith. Keith has said over and over that he’s willing and happy to wait as long as Iris needs to be comfortable and feel good. Greg, on the other hand, talks about the fact that him and Deonna are NOT having sex in every talking head. It doesn’t bode well for their relationship in my opinion.If there was a couple that I was betting on not lasting, it’d be Jamie and Elizabeth. They butt heads like nobody’s business. They’ve had major blowout fights, to the point where Jamie didn’t even spend the night at their place one time. They had a big fight on the honeymoon.Maybe they’ll pull through, but I just don’t like either of them as people. Elizabeth is selfish and spoiled, and Jamie is rude and borderline mean to Elizabeth. Neither of them seem willing to compromise for the other one, which doesn’t make for a happy life together. Elizabeth actually said “am I in hell right now?”<figure id="bc08"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*zvjTLw0K7McntOl4"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@sandym10?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Sandy Millar</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure>I’ve written a little about reality shows and <a href="https://readmedium.com/why-do-we-care-about-celebrity-drama-20bd265fa37c">celebrity lives</a> and how we are fascinated by shock value because it’s borderline unrealistic for most people. The same is true for dating shows like this.I find it incredibly hard to believe that these couples are really able to get to know each other and eventually fall in love when they’ve got a camera crew following them around constantly. They even have nanny cams in their apartments to watch what happens when the crew happens to be out (like in the middle of the night).Part of me has to believe that the smaller disagreements are staged, like when Amber gets upset with Matt for putting his toothbrush in the guest bathroom instead of in the master bath. Like sure, I may have questioned that too, but I wouldn’t have gotten angry and started a fight over it. I have to believe that a lot of the show — if not most of it — is for entertainment.I do believe they are legally married and do have similar issues to any other couple, but it’s gotta be tough to have a “real” marriage and relationship when so much of it is on TV for the whole world to see. Regardless, I’m going to keep watching. Most of the episodes are available to stream for free on Lifetime’s website, so after we finish season 9 maybe we’ll watch more.All in all, watching this show together has brought my husband and me closer together. We laugh at the shenanigans that go down and the utter ridiculous lines the hosts are fed. But we also have a better appreciation for each other.</article></body>

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Thoughts While Watching “Married At First Sight”

I finally jumped on the bandwagon

Season 9 of Lifetime’s renowned Married At First Sight reality show is currently streaming on Netflix in the United States. My husband and I had heard of the show before — most recently on Rhett & Link’s podcast Ear Biscuits — but had little interest. We watched a couple of seasons of The Bachelorette but our preferences in reality TV remain in Shark Tank.

However, we just moved into a new house and we’ve been itching for stuff to do now that we are entirely settled in. He added it to our list and yesterday we started watching.

If you’re unfamiliar with the show, the main premise is that being married at first sight is a “modern day arranged marriage,” according to Dr. Pepper Schwartz, one of the hosts of the show. And yes, contestants do refer to her as “Dr. Pepper.” Hundreds of singles apply to be matched with another hopeful single in their area. There is a series of interviews as well as a home visit before the hosts match up four couples to be wed in two weeks. The couples don’t even get to know their fiance(e)’s name before they walk down the aisle.

I consider myself extremely lucky: My husband and I met in high school and started dating when I was a freshman in college, and we’ve been together ever since. I never had to deal with the whole dating thing. I had a few steady boyfriends in high school but besides that, my husband has been it. We both have occasionally played the “what if” game but watching Married At First Sight just solidifies my love for him because there is no way I would want to marry a complete stranger… no matter how desperate I was.

I am not normally the kind of person that starts a show several seasons in. But seeing as each season of reality dating shows such as Married At First Sight features different people entirely, I don’t feel too bad about starting with season 9. And truly, season 9 has been a roller coaster and has entirely taken over my TV.

This season follows Iris and Keith, Elizabeth and Jamie, Amber and Matt, and Deonna and Greg. They get matched up by the team of experts, married two weeks later, honeymoon in gorgeous Antigua, and are now back in Charlotte, North Carolina getting ready to live their lives together.

What I find odd is that all four couples honeymooned in the same place, at the same resort, all at the same time. The experts/hosts kept explaining that the reasoning for this — which objectively makes sense — is because no one else knows what they’re going through right now except each other. Only these four women and these four men are doing this exact thing right now. So it makes some logical sense to have them talk and interact and become friends.

However I find it strange that these couples would even want to spend time with other people on their honeymoon. Sure, they’re all practically strangers still at this point, but wouldn’t they want to spend quality time with their new spouses rather than spending it with other people? Again — they’re on their honeymoons.

We are only about nine episodes into the season right now — we don’t want to waste it since the full lineup isn’t available on Netflix — but I’ve already had some opinions about these relationships. I’m already rooting for two of these couples to last and two of them to give up.

I wasn’t sure at first about Iris and Keith. Iris is 27 years old and very religious, and she’s a virgin who has been saving herself for her husband. Keith is also very religious, but has not practiced abstinence. This has definitely created some tense moments between the two of them but all in all I really hope they go the distance. They both work in the nonprofit circuit with kids and just in general have a lot in common.

They, as of episode nine, are the only couple who has not consummated their marriage. Which truthfully I think makes a lot of sense. Yes, Iris was saving her first sexual experience for her husband but she is still married to a person she has not known for a long time.

Keith seems like a loving and confident man who is willing to learn and grow with his wife. I just hope that Iris feels the same way. Seeing as she audibly and physically cringes every time sex is brought up, I’m not sure yet.

Amber and Matt are the couple I’ve been rooting for from the get go. They clicked right away, despite their near two foot height difference (she is 5'2" and he is 6'9"). They consummated their marriage on the second night of the honeymoon and Amber has been openly infatuated and attracted to her husband since the minute she walked down the aisle.

Matt is a lot more reserved but still seems to be getting to the place where he loves Amber. He’s not as open or vulnerable with Amber as she is with him, but I think through communication and patience they could definitely get there.

They’ve had a few bumps in the road, they’ve been big bumps. Matt is a professional basketball player who went pro overseas and has spent the last seven years travelling constantly. Amber made it clear that if he were to have to go overseas again this early into their marriage, it would be a deal breaker. Matt has said over and over that he has a “new business venture” starting up in Charlotte, but that he doesn’t know what might happen and he’s worried that he will have to go overseas again.

He also went out one night to hang out with some friends, and didn’t come home for over 24 hours. He didn’t call or text Amber to tell him where he was or when he’d be home. When he finally did come back to their apartment, he said he just didn’t really think about it. This seemed like a red flag to me: It’s just common courtesy to let someone know where you’ll be. She hadn’t heard from him for over 24 hours. For all she knew he could have been dead.

Regardless, I’m still rooting for them to make it work because they do seem to really like each other and they’ve clicked since the beginning.

Now as for Deonna and Greg, I don’t feel one way or the other about them. They seem like they’ve been married for ten years — but not in a good way. They don’t seem to really be into each other at all. Deonna’s whole schtick is that she’d been single for the last ten years because she was working on herself and her career. This is completely respectable and admirable. However, that does mean that for the last ten years she’s been incredibly independent and now has to learn what it means to be a partner.

Greg, on the other hand, is a total sweetheart. I think he does love Deonna and he thinks she’s an angel on earth. All he does is compliment her — much to Deonna’s dismay for some reason — and try and be a better man for her. They haven’t had any major bumps in their marriage besides not having sex for nearly the entire first month. In my personal opinion, I think that’s totally fine. They’re strangers, they’re warming up to each other, and, again, Deonna has been single for ten years. It makes sense that she’s going to take her time before having sex.

Greg just doesn’t seem as patient as Keith. Keith has said over and over that he’s willing and happy to wait as long as Iris needs to be comfortable and feel good. Greg, on the other hand, talks about the fact that him and Deonna are NOT having sex in every talking head. It doesn’t bode well for their relationship in my opinion.

If there was a couple that I was betting on not lasting, it’d be Jamie and Elizabeth. They butt heads like nobody’s business. They’ve had major blowout fights, to the point where Jamie didn’t even spend the night at their place one time. They had a big fight on the honeymoon.

Maybe they’ll pull through, but I just don’t like either of them as people. Elizabeth is selfish and spoiled, and Jamie is rude and borderline mean to Elizabeth. Neither of them seem willing to compromise for the other one, which doesn’t make for a happy life together. Elizabeth actually said “am I in hell right now?”

I’ve written a little about reality shows and celebrity lives and how we are fascinated by shock value because it’s borderline unrealistic for most people. The same is true for dating shows like this.

I find it incredibly hard to believe that these couples are really able to get to know each other and eventually fall in love when they’ve got a camera crew following them around constantly. They even have nanny cams in their apartments to watch what happens when the crew happens to be out (like in the middle of the night).

Part of me has to believe that the smaller disagreements are staged, like when Amber gets upset with Matt for putting his toothbrush in the guest bathroom instead of in the master bath. Like sure, I may have questioned that too, but I wouldn’t have gotten angry and started a fight over it. I have to believe that a lot of the show — if not most of it — is for entertainment.

I do believe they are legally married and do have similar issues to any other couple, but it’s gotta be tough to have a “real” marriage and relationship when so much of it is on TV for the whole world to see. Regardless, I’m going to keep watching. Most of the episodes are available to stream for free on Lifetime’s website, so after we finish season 9 maybe we’ll watch more.

All in all, watching this show together has brought my husband and me closer together. We laugh at the shenanigans that go down and the utter ridiculous lines the hosts are fed. But we also have a better appreciation for each other.