Those Most Threatened by the Word 'Privilege' are the Most Privileged of Us All
The irony of this isn’t beyond anyone, but here’s why it’s the case.
Being an outspoken feminist who writes as a living, I address the conversation of inequality often.
I talk about a topic, especially, of privilege. The privilege I live with, the privilege others live with, and the unjust disadvantage many others have to live with because this imbalance exists.
My most ‘offensive’ article to some is one where I outline how I pointed out white, male privileged on Twitter, and a white male called me a “Karen”. I spend the article outlining how I know that I live with significant privilege, as a white woman, living in a first-world country, coming from a middle-class family — and I don’t have an issue recognizing that fact.
What still leaves me scratching my head is how a majority of women really enjoyed that article — but a chunk of male readers had a lot of complaints with my article.
And why?
Because they didn’t like the use of the word privilege existing in the piece… at all:
“I have a mission right now. I want to kill the word privilege. It’s a bullsh*t word and it gets people’s hackles up without adding benefit.”
“Using the word privilege is a bad way to ask people to be more emphathetic.”
The irony of this that it was two white men making these comments.
Their immediate defensiveness, and backs getting up at the sheer mention of this word, is just so damn interesting.
Thus, I thought it important to dig into the reasons why accepting privilege is something they find difficult, or are simply resistant to.
1. Their place of privilege is far too convenient for them.
They just don’t want to talk about it.
They don’t want things to change.
If things were to become more equal, they would lose their edge. They’d lose their natural advantage. That means having to work harder for what they want, and sometimes not getting what they want, no matter how hard they try.
You know, like the rest of us.
In an equal society, we all have a chance, and that’s just and right.
For those who automatically gain from the unequal reality of the world, they’re most benefitting of the patriarchy and systematic imbalance.
While it would be better for the entire population if things were equal, there are certain people who are just out there for themselves.
And they’ll do whatever they can to keep their unearned advantage.
2. Facing their own privilege is too uncomfortable.
And thus, they reject it.
They want to avoid it at all costs.
So, by doing so, they simply deny it entirely.
Because denial is the easiest way to avoid an uncomfortable conversation.
In these circumstances, I have two things to point out:
- Yes, acknowledging one’s privilege is uncomfortable — but it’s also our responsibility, should we find ourselves in an unjustly beneficial position. And,
- When looking at what inequality does in the world, and the negative impact it has on the lives of others, having to accept an uncomfortable truth is really the least you can do. Truly.
You know what’s really uncomfortable? Having a higher chance of dying from a police encounter, simply because of the colour of your skin.
You know what’s really uncomfortable? Stepping forward to accuse a rapist, and immediately accused of lying because your attacker is a varsity athlete from a well-to-do family, and with such a bright future he simply could not throw that all away by raping a passed-out young woman next to a dumpster.
Now that sh*t’s uncomfortable.
You recognizing that you might have a bit of a social edge for no valid reason? Really not all that uncomfortable, in comparison.
3. They just really don’t see it.
When you live in privilege, it can be hard to imagine the entirely different circumstances of walking in someone else’s shoes.
And especially if you’re a white person surrounded by equally privileged people, with no further exposure to other cultures or socio-economic realities, the blinders are even thicker.
There are many who do not believe in that which they cannot see. Which, you know, is valid.
But the risk of this is assuming that we are capable of seeing all things, experiencing all human realities, and are all-knowing in our extremely limited world view — that belief system is frankly dangerous, and quite damaging.
This is where a bit of self-awareness and humbleness need to come into play.
We are beings who are limited in many things — and our knowledge of the world is one of those big ones. We’re not born with all the answers — we learn things as we go.
Final word.
Learning and educating ourselves is not something that we graduate from when we turn 18 years old — we must carry a philosophy of life-long learning with us for every day we are alive.
That means, at any time, our own beliefs or views can be and should be challenged by the world we live in.
To refuse to continue learning, or believe that you have all the answers, is frankly quite irresponsible.
But you know what is responsible? Taking a step back, being a little humble, and recognizing where you stand in the world.
Recognizing that you yourself may be in an unjust place of advantage that simply isn’t fair.
What’s responsible is committing to securing equality for all people, despite the fact that you will lose that very edge, because you and I both know that it’s the right thing to do.
It is, in fact, our responsibility as global citizens to work towards that very equality.
And if you don’t like the sound of that? Well, might be time to take a little look into yourself and have an honest, internal conversation… or two.
Never miss a single beat — sign up for my monthly newsletter to get the scoop!👉 https://bit.ly/33XgtKT