This Word Ruins Your Feedback

Inspiration Bites | #002.

Feedback is an essential component of growth and development. We need it at work, in our personal lives, and if you’re an entrepreneur, you certainly need your customers’ feedback to keep making products they care about.

Feedback helps us understand how we’re doing and what we need to improve.

However, there’s one word that can undermine the effectiveness of our feedback, and that’s “but.”

For example, you might say:

“That was great, but…” or “You spoke well, but…”

When we use the word “but” in our feedback, it can have a negative impact on the recipient’s psychology. This is because of a concept called negativity bias, which means that negative experiences have a stronger impact on our brains than positive ones.

Even if we intend to share a genuine positive feedback and highlight an area of improvement, using the word “but” can overshadow the positivity and cause the recipient to focus on the negative.

It can even lead to defensiveness and missed opportunities for growth, which defeats the objective of the feedback in the first place.

So, what should you do instead?

Instead of using the word ‘but’, use ‘and’.

For instance, instead of saying:

“You did an excellent job on this report, but you didn’t add some visuals,” try saying:

“You did an excellent job on this report, and if you could add some visuals, it would make it even better.”

By using ‘and’ instead of ‘but’, you retain the positivity of the feedback, which helps keep the focus on collaboration and growth. It’s a small change that can have a big impact on how a feedback is received.

So, the next time you’re giving feedback, to ensure your feedback is received positively and constructively, consider using ‘and’ instead of ‘but’.

P.S. You can WATCH THE VIDEO version here: