THIS — The Awful Abuse of A Pronoun

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1978

Abstract

with our arms to indicate the entire world and say “THIS is a shitshow.” or “THIS is a hoax.” or “THIS is what happens when you stop paying attention and let morons take over. THIS is the State of our Union. THIS is getting really old.” I am on vacation and THIS is all that I can think about. Is THIS ever going to end. Will I always have to step off the trail when hiking in Acadia so some dumb ass with no mask on, walking toward me, who probably thinks I’m a dumb ass for wearing a mask, can pass me with 6 feet of distance between us? I am only doing THIS because THEY told me to. I forgot which one of THEM it was, but I’m pretty sure THEY had an advanced degree from a prestigious university. I’m pretty sure THEY know what THIS is all about and have told me how to properly deal with it.What do we do about THIS? What do we do to get THAT thing (virus, protest, elected official) out of here. How do we get THEM to tell us the truth about how to do THAT? No clear antecedents to any of these pronouns, but for many a clear coded knowledge that each pronoun takes into account a collective awareness of misdeeds. The left and the right have catalogs of THESE misdemeanors and felonies against their enemies. The THEM of the political extremities, who have somehow caused THIS mess we are in, whichever mess THAT may be is only because of THEM. I don’t know what any of THIS means, or even exactly what I’m talking about anymore, but the world has changed and it makes me uncomfortable so there has to be a THEM or a THAT which has lead to THIS. Blame needs to be placed, appropriately or not on someone or something. THIS could not have just happened.We are in THIS together. THIS, however, is completely undefined and when placed in

Options

front of us as a salve for our collective perception of misdeeds consoles us into thinking we are correct and THEY are wrong. We all have a THEM whom we can blame for enacting these crimes against us. Left or right or in the middle with enemies on both sides, we will all get through THIS together. It is this undefined THIS that worries me. We are all struggling in some way with the abrupt change that happened in March. That change took everyone by surprise, even those that it shouldn’t have surprised were surprised. I think we all can agree that the handling of THAT was just a jumble. By WHOM and HOW we can disagree on but it has gotten us to the very uncertain NOW.So in the NOW we have THIS. We are going forward, toward some unknown future marked by the start of the school year, or by a certain number of cases indicating THIS is over, or the introduction of a vaccine against THIS. We are living in a NOW with more uncertainty brought about by THIS than any one of us can remember happening before in our lifetimes. My lifetime goes back 60 years, and THIS shit show beats them all.What is the resolution? I should have introduced THAT 6 paragraphs ago. But there is none. Nothing. We just live in the NOW. With THIS, caused by THEM. We wait like good sheep or bad sheep for it to be fixed by THEM or by THAT. I really haven’t a clue. I’ll just keep stepping off the trail and turning my back on the mask-less family from Kentucky taking a selfie near the edge of the rocks on Cadillac Mountain. I’ll wear my mask on the Windjammer at sunset, and enjoy the cruise around Mt. Desert island and the view of Acadia National Park even while THIS is going on. I’ll wear a face covering, over my nose and mouth, not over my eyes. I like things to be clear.</article></body>

We’ve been hearing it all spring. We will all get through “this” together. In 2020 “THIS” graduated and became a proper noun, or a super noun. We are now in THIS together, muddling through THIS, working on THIS, making the best of THIS, fucking THIS up. Ignoring THIS.

According to Dictionary.com “this” is a pronoun “used to indicate a person, thing, idea, state, event, time, remark, etc., as present, near, just mentioned or pointed out, supposed to be understood, or by way of emphasis”. That would be the small case “this”. In 2020 the uppercase, bold print, all caps THIS indicates the zombie apocalypse or whatever it is we are going through at any given moment that is causing us to feel rumbled. THIS can mean the pandemic, the riots, the weather, the climate, the government, the dust under the sofa. We don’t care as long as we have someone to blame, or someone to go through THIS with. THIS is a thing we will kvetch about.

Our President likes to say that all THIS is going to “just go away.” Maybe once he goes away it will. There was a time before THIS time when you could pronounce, “This will all be over soon” and people did not try to have you committed or claim you were delusional. Now THIS is what defines our society. A society that is under the influence of both THIS and THAT and THEM. All pronouns, all being abused.

Pronouns are wonderful when they have a clear antecedent. But now, we can throw out a THIS, motion with our arms to indicate the entire world and say “THIS is a shitshow.” or “THIS is a hoax.” or “THIS is what happens when you stop paying attention and let morons take over. THIS is the State of our Union. THIS is getting really old.” I am on vacation and THIS is all that I can think about. Is THIS ever going to end. Will I always have to step off the trail when hiking in Acadia so some dumb ass with no mask on, walking toward me, who probably thinks I’m a dumb ass for wearing a mask, can pass me with 6 feet of distance between us? I am only doing THIS because THEY told me to. I forgot which one of THEM it was, but I’m pretty sure THEY had an advanced degree from a prestigious university. I’m pretty sure THEY know what THIS is all about and have told me how to properly deal with it.

What do we do about THIS? What do we do to get THAT thing (virus, protest, elected official) out of here. How do we get THEM to tell us the truth about how to do THAT? No clear antecedents to any of these pronouns, but for many a clear coded knowledge that each pronoun takes into account a collective awareness of misdeeds. The left and the right have catalogs of THESE misdemeanors and felonies against their enemies. The THEM of the political extremities, who have somehow caused THIS mess we are in, whichever mess THAT may be is only because of THEM. I don’t know what any of THIS means, or even exactly what I’m talking about anymore, but the world has changed and it makes me uncomfortable so there has to be a THEM or a THAT which has lead to THIS. Blame needs to be placed, appropriately or not on someone or something. THIS could not have just happened.

We are in THIS together. THIS, however, is completely undefined and when placed in front of us as a salve for our collective perception of misdeeds consoles us into thinking we are correct and THEY are wrong. We all have a THEM whom we can blame for enacting these crimes against us. Left or right or in the middle with enemies on both sides, we will all get through THIS together. It is this undefined THIS that worries me. We are all struggling in some way with the abrupt change that happened in March. That change took everyone by surprise, even those that it shouldn’t have surprised were surprised. I think we all can agree that the handling of THAT was just a jumble. By WHOM and HOW we can disagree on but it has gotten us to the very uncertain NOW.

So in the NOW we have THIS. We are going forward, toward some unknown future marked by the start of the school year, or by a certain number of cases indicating THIS is over, or the introduction of a vaccine against THIS. We are living in a NOW with more uncertainty brought about by THIS than any one of us can remember happening before in our lifetimes. My lifetime goes back 60 years, and THIS shit show beats them all.

What is the resolution? I should have introduced THAT 6 paragraphs ago. But there is none. Nothing. We just live in the NOW. With THIS, caused by THEM. We wait like good sheep or bad sheep for it to be fixed by THEM or by THAT. I really haven’t a clue. I’ll just keep stepping off the trail and turning my back on the mask-less family from Kentucky taking a selfie near the edge of the rocks on Cadillac Mountain. I’ll wear my mask on the Windjammer at sunset, and enjoy the cruise around Mt. Desert island and the view of Acadia National Park even while THIS is going on. I’ll wear a face covering, over my nose and mouth, not over my eyes. I like things to be clear.