This Technique Will Chase Your Blues Away

The personal benefits of doing random acts of kindness

Every day we make tens of thousands of decisions — from deciding when to get out of bed to choosing what to think about as we lay down to sleep. There is one decision that will always make our day brighter, the world a better place, and chase the blues away. And that is deciding to do a random act of kindness.

A random act of kindness, RAK, is doing something unexpectedly nice for another. There are a variety of RAKs you can do for others that take just seconds. For example, you could share a smile, help someone reach something off the top shelf at the supermarket, or hold the door open for them as they walk out with arms full of bags.

The average person makes an eye-popping 35,000 choices per day. Assuming that most people spend around seven hours per day sleeping and thus blissfully choice-free, that makes roughly 2,000 decisions per hour or one decision every two seconds.

- Eva M. Krockow Ph.D., in Psychology Today

How do you feel when a friend or colleague buys your lunch, brings you a cup of coffee, or unexpectedly offers to help you with a task you dread doing? You can give others similar feelings of joy by taking the time to do RAKs for them, too.

Other benefits of performing random acts of kindness include:

• Improved relationships: Acts of kindness can strengthen relationships. When you are kind to others, they are more likely to pay the favor forward. That can result in a positive spiral of kindness.
• Enhanced social connections: Random kindnesses help to create a sense of community and belonging. Doing kind deeds invests you in your community — at work or school, in your extended family, and your neighborhood.
• Sense of Purpose: Helping others and making the world a better place can heighten your sense of purpose and direction. This is especially important when you are struggling to find meaning in your life or have a case of the blues.

Sarah was having a bad day. It all started when she got stuck in a long traffic jam. Instead of her normal 30-minute commute to work, it took her an hour. As a result, she missed the team meeting where she was to present news on closing the biggest deal of her career. When she finally arrived at the ofice, there were ten urgent requests waiting in her inbox, four invites for meetings, and a notice of a project delay that affected one of her biggest customers. By six o’clock, she was exhausted and exasperated. All Sarah wanted to do was go home and binge-watch TV.

Unfortunately, she knew that her refrigerator was empty except for a carton of milk. Having cereal for dinner was not her idea of a satisfying meal after a long and wretched day in the office. So she stopped at the store on her way home.

As she was walking up to the door, she noticed an elderly gentleman struggling to put his groceries in his car. It appeared that his bags had been over-packed by the store’s bagger. And when he attempted to lift the first one out of the shopping cart, it ripped. And his groceries rolled through the parking lot.

Seeing this, Sarah chased down the speeding cans, then hurried back to her car for a couple of bags. She repacked the man’s groceries into smaller, more manageable lots and helped him to get those into his trunk. The man was so grateful that he nearly cried.

He told Sarah about how he just can’t do things the way he used to and spent all his time alone with no one to talk to. He thanked Sarah profusely. As she finally made her way into the store, she felt a little bit better about her day and the good she had done for a stranger. Many people would have just ignored that old man and his struggles, but Sarah had made a difference.

Doing random acts of kindness is just that easy. It only takes you a couple of minutes to make a deep and lasting positive impact on others. What constitutes a random act of kindness? They are often unexpected; done unconditionally, with no consideration for receiving something in return; and can be done anytime or anywhere. Here are five examples of RAKS you can effortlessly do, though I encourage you to add to this list:

Pay for someone’s meal or coffee: If you’re in a restaurant or coffee shop and you see someone who is struggling, offer to pay for their meal or drink. They don’t even need to be struggling for you to pick up their tab.

One time I paid for the meal of the people in the car behind me at In and Out Burger. I wish I could have seen their faces when the cashier told them their meal was already paid for. I’m sure that meal tasted even better. Maybe, they even did the same for the people behind them. Wouldn’t that have been magical?!

Give a compliment: Complimenting others on their outfits, hairstyles, or work can be a small but meaningful act of empathy that has lasting results.

I usually notice haircuts and different clothes on people I see often. It just takes a second to recognize those changes in others; and it often raises their level of confidence as well. When I catch someone doing a good job, I acknowledge their work and my appreciation. This demonstrates that they matter to me.

Write a note: A handwritten note of encouragement or thanks may seem small, but it carries signifigant impact. Just as complimenting someone for a job well done brings a sense of satisfaction, writing appreciation notes brings a sense of pride and recognition to the recipient, too. Thank you notes make an even greater impression than verbal compliments do, because they are so rarely used in today’s digital age.

Donate to charity: Donating money or goods to charity is a way to make a difference in the lives of others. Besides giving to charity you can also give to people’s causes that you find valuable. Contributing to a friend’s Go Fund Me campaign, or supporting content that you like with a contribution helps to sustain the efforts of others and can provide them a hand up, not just a handout. For example, I make regular contributions to my friend’s manga project.

Smile: Smiling at someone, even a stranger, can make them feel more welcomed and brighten their day. Smiles make the world a better place. They lead to success because they encourage others.

Doing random acts of kindness may seem to have more benefit for the receiver than the giver. However, the rewards for the doer are pretty great, too. Performing random acts of kindness and good deeds enhances your sense of self-esteem.

You feel more powerful when you can do for others. RAKs also chase away depression. Who can feel sad when doing good? And they give you something to look forward to. Choosing when to take action creates anticipation of good things to come. These benefits combined with those stated above, make taking a little time to do random kindnesses a no-brainer. It’s a win-win situation.

So why not do a random act of kindness today and chase your blues away?