This New Behavioral Pandemic Is Taking Over The Human Race.

Gladly, we all carry it’s vaccine within ourselves

My Parents always had a bitter-not-so-sweet relationship. As far as I can recall, I have always seen them arguing and fighting over issues. Never seen them travel happily, eat together or even sit and talk nicely to each other.

In 2019, I was at a friend’s house and the lunchtime hit. We sat down to eat. And to my surprise, his parents also sat down to eat with us.

It was a new sight for me.

Seeing his parents eat together, tears flushed through my eyes internally and a thought clouded my mind — Why don’t my parents eat together? It feels so nice.

This morning I was having a breakfast conversation with my mother. It was a casual discussion on how times have changed. Just some years before, you three were children and I remember making you all learn tables and would beat you all for bad handwriting… and now all three of you are adults and have started earning and have retired us… my mother said to me.

The topic of my father also surfaced. We discussed some things about him and just before the last sip of her tea, my mother said — “Now at this point in time, if your father criticizes me for something… I would not stay silent. Not because I wish to defend myself… but I will say to him(my father) — You have no right to criticize me on anything because you didn’t appreciate me for my good things in the first place.”

I didn’t say anything and the conversation ended.

But her last remark stayed with me. The thing about appreciation.

Sitting there, I lingered a bit on this. How lack of appreciation makes a human cold to other things.

Why the hell do we refrain from appreciating someone for their work? Or even their good behavior towards us?

• Will appreciating someone make us less of what we are?
• Will saying two words of appreciation breach our “false” ego?
• Or we have become so cold-hearted that when someone makes a mistake, we announce it on top of our voices but when the same person does something admirable, we zip our mouths.

Imagine this —

You have a dog in the house. It’s your duty to take him out every morning and evening. There is nothing wrong with being the dog walker of the house, right? Everyone is assigned certain daily tasks in a household.

After taking the dog out every day for months, one day you overslept, dreaming of a happy and cozy unrealistic Paris vacation with your crush… and missed taking the dog out in the morning and the damn dog pooped in the parking space.

Now you are being lectured on why didn’t you take the dog out. Again, no problem with being lectured.

But, here’s where the problem really lies.

The same people who are lecturing you for not taking the dog out today… didn’t appreciate you even once when you took that doo-doo dynamo out for months every day.

Won’t you feel betrayed by your own people?

Imagine going through this feeling every day in the big as well as the smallest of the things you do for other people.

Pretty brutal right?

Yes. Pandemics are brutal.

Gladly, this pandemic stops being contagious when honest and true people step up.

We all carry the vaccines in our hearts… And in our mouths… And in our actions.

There is no pandemic that has as simple a cure as the pandemic of under-appreciation.

All you need is a good big ‘heart’ to understand and love people.

Another organ called “the mouth” also works really well.

When your mom brings you lunch in your room because you are busy typing an article on appreciation for the last two hours, the least you must say is a humble “thank-you” with a gentle smile on your face.

When you don’t want to use your words… gestures come to save the day.

A little nod with a smile goes a long way.

Gestures are not just confined to bodily postures. Bringing a cone of ice cream or chocolate when you go to your friend’s house is a sweet way to thank him for inviting you and celebrating your friendship.

A few more examples of where you should not step back from saying thank you -

• After buying something from the shop.
• To the taxi driver who drove you to your workplace.
• Your friend who comes to your home to pick you up.
• To someone who helps you by sharing some contacts.
• The waiter/waitress at the restaurant.
• To the coworker who covers your shift for you.
• The neighbor when they lend you something.
• Your stylist/barber.
• To the Amazon delivery guy.
• To someone who helps you make space in a busy parking station.

You get the drill.

As we all are writers on Medium… taking out a few minutes to read stories from fellow writers and leaving a simple note of appreciation can brighten up their day and elevate their confidence.

“You can’t just write and write and put things in a drawer. They wither without the warm sun of someone else’s appreciation.”

― Anne Morrow Lindbergh

A big hug if you are here.

Do share some instances where you felt under-appreciated or had a similar feeling.

Note: The verbs mentioned for the dog are just for explanatory purposes. I don’t hate dogs. I have one and I love him. Although he too is a doo-doo dynamo. Lol.

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