This is Why You’re Not Meditating Consistently

And How to (Finally) Make Meditation a Habit

Let’s face it:

Your brain hates meditation.

Meditation forces you to face your mental clutter and clean it up.

It’s the mental equivalent of telling a kid to tidy their room. Of course, they’ll hate it. And, your headspace is much harder to clean up. So, your brain hates the thought of meditation and actively fights against it.

But how great does it feel after you meditate? It’s not “just in your head,” either. Research shows meditation can:

• Reduce the negative effects of stress.
• Soothe the symptoms of depression.
• Improve your attention span.
• Help you sleep better.

But there’s more:

Meditation improves your physical health, too.

Research shows it helps control pain, significantly improving the quality of life in people with chronic conditions. It can prevent Alzheimer’s disease, improve dementia symptoms, and help families and caregivers cope.

Even more impressively:

We have strong evidence that meditation can help you live longer. By reducing hypertension, it lowers your risk of heart disease — the leading cause of death in the United States (and other developed countries).

In Short:

You know that meditation is beneficial. So why aren’t you meditating consistently?

You Have More “Important” Things to Do

Meditation isn’t easy or immediately rewarding. It’s a time investment you make — or you don’t make, if you don’t see a potential ROI. So, the first thing to ask yourself is:

Do I see value in meditation?

Of course, science says you should. There are countless benefits of meditating — both mental and physical, some of them listed in the beginning of this article. But meditation isn’t particularly fun, nor do you see results right away.

If you don’t have your “eye on the prize”, meditation feels like a waste of time.

But, as the Zen saying goes:

You should sit in meditation for twenty minutes every day — unless you’re too busy; then you should sit for an hour.

So how do you go from “too busy to meditate” to “very busy and meditating regularly”?

Is It Your Ego Speaking?

Meditation is ‘non-doing’ rather than doing. Your brain likes doing:

Our mind is a fantastic machine. Unfortunately, it is also easy to distract.

One minute I’m thinking about this article. Then, I remember I have to do laundry today. Did I get a fabric softener when I went shopping this week? Thinking about the supermarket trip, remember how that lady bumped into my shopping cart? And before I know it, I’m pondering on the rudeness of strangers in the supermarket.

Does it sound familiar? It’s because our brains work like this when they’re on autopilot. We go from one thought to another in a split second.

Buddhists call this way of thinking the “monkey mind.” Our mind is jumping between thoughts like a monkey jumps from branch to branch.

It’s our ego’s way of taking control and keeping everything on track. But this strategy is far from efficient. It’s the mental equivalent of having 20 tabs open on your browser. When you think of ‘everything,’ you can’t concentrate on anything.

Meditation Banishes This Ego-Driven Mindframe

As clinical psychologist John Wellwood put it:

Meditation provides a way of learning how to let go. As we sit, the self we’ve been trying to construct and make into a nice, neat package continues to unravel.

By meditating, you free yourself from the ego and get access to a deeper level of your self.

But the ego exists for a reason — it’s there to protect you. And, protecting you (to your ego) means keeping those tabs open. That’s why the ego resists meditation — because it means losing control.

The tricky part is your brain won’t outright tell you “Stop meditating!” Instead, it speaks in phrases like “You don’t have the time to do this right now.” or “There are far more productive things you can do.”

But, if it were about time or productivity, why can’t you resist watching TV or scrolling through social media?

How to Stop Listening to Your Ego

When you notice the resistance, take a second to examine it. Why aren’t you meditating? Is your schedule so packed that you can’t fit five minutes? Or, could it be your ego speaking?

Once you recognize the ego’s faulty logic:

1. Give thanks. The ego isn’t your enemy, it’s just a scared, conservative part of your brain. It’s like dealing with your ever-so-pessimistic uncle — with loving disagreement. Say, “I know you’re trying to protect me, and I am grateful for this.”
2. Make a conscious decision. Go against the weak arguments of the ego. Tell it, “I know you’re resisting this, but we’re doing it anyway.”

Of course, this requires a degree of willpower. But willpower is an exhaustible resource, and relying on it isn’t a sustainable solution.

Solve this by turning meditation into a habit.

Here is how:

Step 1: Being Busy Isn’t a Badge of Honor

With the rise of hustle culture, there’s an increasing pressure to perform. Being busy is almost a badge of honor, our piling obligations — proof of commitment to succeed.

“Busy” Doesn’t Equal “Successful”

It usually equals stress, burnout, and low productivity.

Say you have five tasks for the day. If you let your monkey mind run loose, you’ll be thinking about all five at the same time.

You’re only lending 20% of your brainpower to each task! And that’s assuming you can divide your attention without wasting precious energy.

In reality, things are even worse. Multitasking only wastes your time and harms your productivity. The more complex the tasks, the more you lose by trying to tackle them at once.

Know the Power of Focused Effort

Rather than keeping busy, aim for concentration. By giving your undivided attention to each task, you can get it done faster, easier, and much more efficiently.

Meditation gives you laser-sharp focus.

There is a vast amount of research to prove this. One study had volunteers do a short 10-minute meditation. All of the test subjects were novice meditators. Even so, the brief meditation supercharged their attention!

Remember the Zen saying at the beginning of this article? That’s the scientific proof for it. The more you have to accomplish, the more you benefit from focused attention.

Since meditation boosts concentration, it’s the best tool for increasing productivity.

In other words:

While the world tells you to “keep busy,” taking time to improve focus and productivity is the real key to success!

Step 2: Understand How Meditation Works

Meditation is decidedly unglamorous.

For the most part, it’s just calming your monkey brain over and over again. Whether you focus on breath, a mantra, or a guided visualization, meditation is ‘doing nothing.’ And, as we already saw, this goes against all instincts of your ego.

Do you feel like you’re not accomplishing anything? That’s completely normal.

It’s no different than brushing your teeth every morning. While you don’t feel an instant change in your dental health, neglect it long enough, and you’ll see the caries. The same goes for meditation.

It’s mental health upkeep, not a quick fix.

By releasing your expectations and start seeing meditation for what it is — a non-fancy habit for a healthier, more productive brain.

Step 3: Learn How to Meditate Right

Meditation is a skill. At first, you will suck at it. Then, you will suck a little less. In time, your practice will expand, and focus will come a little easier for you.

Embrace the Process

Much like computer programming, horse riding, or bread-making, you don’t pick up meditation in a day. Be gentle with yourself during the learning process.

After all, you’re not preparing for a final exam. There is no rush.

As long as you’re progressing a little every day, you’re on the right track.

That said, you wouldn’t try to learn horse-riding by yourself. You’d probably hire an expert, join a club, or, at the very least, read a book on the subject. The same goes for meditation:

Start With Guided Meditations

Guided meditation is one of the most accessible gateways into the world of mindfulness. Best of all, thousands of guided meditations are available at the tips of your fingers.

Insight Timer is my personal recommendation. It has thousands of guided meditations, sorted by length, benefits, and type of practice. Best of all, Insight Timer is free for both iPhone and Android users — the optional in-app purchases only enhance your experience, but they’re not essential.

Headspace is another popular choice. The award-winning app gives you a simple, no-BS introduction to meditation with helpful tips and graphics along the way.

Simple Habit is the meditation app for people who don’t have time to meditate. Designed to help you commit, Simple Habit helps you establish a practice, five minutes at a time.

And, don’t forget YouTube also has a virtually limitless amount of guided meditations.

Learn About Meditation

There are plenty of fantastic meditation resources out there. With so many to choose from, though, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. That is why it’s best to start small.

Focus on one teacher, one book, one instruction at a time.

Here are some great meditation books for you to explore:

• “Mindfulness in Plain English” by Henepola Gunaratana is a clear, step-by-step guide through the principles, benefits, and challenges of mindfulness practice. Very beginner-friendly and easy to understand!
• “10% Happier” by Dan Harris describes Harris’s long journey to silencing his monkey mind and becoming 10% happier. It’s eloquent, engaging, and highly motivating. Get a taste of Dan Harris’s style from his Google Talk!
• “Focused and Fearless. A Meditator’s Guide to States of Deep Joy, Calm, and Clarity” by Shaila Catherine walks you through the principles of Buddhist meditation, going deeper than most beginner’s guides do. While complete novices will benefit from Catherine’s book, so will meditators with a few months of experience.

I also highly recommend Andy Puddicombe’s “All it takes is 10 mindful minutes,” TED talk, and Gen Kelsang Nyema’s “Happiness is all in your mind.”

Step 4: Make It a Part of the Flow

Tap into the power of habit. Now that you have the correct mindset and tools commit to making meditation a part of your daily flow.

You don’t have to think about it, just do it.

And, since it’s not that simple to “just do it,” turn meditation into a habit by making it a part of a flow.

What does that look like? Here are some ideas:

1. Morning ritual — most of us have a morning routine, even if it’s just getting up, making coffee, and brushing our teeth. Set one of your morning activities as the trigger for your meditation habit. For instance, aim to always meditate after brushing your teeth.
2. Yoga — a Vinyasa yoga flow is the perfect prelude to a meditation practice, as it puts you in sync with your breath and quiets your mind.
3. Right after work — meditation is a beautiful way to relax your mind after a long day. Since your willpower is exhausted at this point, set a trigger. Why not “meditate before you reach for your phone”?

In Conclusion: Everything You Need to Know

Meditation is a part of healthy living, much like a healthy diet and regular exercise. Since when are healthy habits supposed to be easy? Most of the time, meditation won’t feel glorious. It wouldn’t feel like you’re doing anything at all.

The magic of meditation is there’s no magic at all.

Let go of your ego’s false logic. Meditation doesn’t have to feel productive to be effective. To help with consistency:

1. Don’t glamorize being busy — value productivity instead. Realize how useful meditation is in helping you achieve it.
2. Understand meditation works over time. Just like brushing your teeth, meditation is essential as a daily habit, and that’s when you’ll see the best results.
3. Learn about meditation. Take the time to grow in your practice. It won’t happen overnight but embrace the learning curve, rather than being intimidated by it.
4. Make it a part of your flow. Whether you introduce meditation in your morning ritual or your after-work wind off, try to schedule it as a part of a routine. This way, you can remove willpower from the equation and ‘just do it’!

What is your biggest challenge when it comes to meditation and consistency? Let me know in the comments below!