This Is Why I Had To Let You Go

Letting You Go So I Could Be Free

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need."— Tao Te Ching.

Nonmembers Click Here To Read Full Story: First, when I let you go, it didn't mean I loved you less. It didn't mean that I didn't see a future with you. It didn't mean that I no longer wanted to hold on to you. It didn't mean that I met someone else. It didn't mean that I was tired of you. It didn't mean that I stopped caring. It didn't mean you consumed me, as the female black widow does after mating with the male spider. (Now you know why this spider is called "the black widow.”)

I let you go because I thought you became distant. But weeks after letting go, I realized that you never actually became distant. You gave me the space I needed so that I could miss you. In my blindness, I thought you stopped caring. In actuality, you cared too much.

You cared so much that you put up with my shit. While I was holding on to you so tightly, little did I know I was pushing you away. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. Up until that last second, I finally decided to let you go.

I didn’t give you the space you needed to breathe. And so, I’m guilty of not allowing you to love me, freely.

I let you go because:

• If I held on any longer, you would have been the one to let me go.
• You deserve to be free; you deserve to live your life.
• You don't belong to me; you are not my property.
• I wanted you to know that I could live without you.
• I had no other choice.

Letting go can mean so many things. When the person you're in a romantic relationship with tells you: "I'm ready to let you go now."

Letting go in this context means they realize your interest level in them has dropped dramatically. They finally realize that you need to be let go of because holding on only pushes you further away.

They won't let you go, expecting you to come back. They let you go, hoping that you will become a better person. They let you go, expecting that you will find happiness, even if it does not include them. They let you go, wishing you joy, happiness, and contentment.

“I let you go because I myself needed to be free.”

I still want to be with you. I still want to see you. I still think about you. I still wonder what you're doing. I still look at my phone, hoping you'd call. I still have dreams about you. I still think about the times we fought and what we did after. I still think about your smile. I still stay up till 4 in the morning because that's when I used to wake you up. I still want you. I still want you to be free. I still want you to enjoy your life. I still.

After weeks of no contact, I texted you today and asked you to call me. I could tell by your reply that you weren't as happy to hear from me as I was to hear from you. But, at least now, I'll never have to wonder. I let you go because I wanted you back., I let you go because I was afraid to lose you. I had to show you I was strong enough to go on without you.

You still need to call. You read my text, and you still need to reply. That tells me everything I need to know. I really had to let you go, but the night is still young, and I still have hope.

Who would have thought though, right? Our little secret.

Written by: Joseph Mayuyo (November 21 of 2018, Last edited on June 13 of 2022. ) Join my email list!