avatarTovah Rainsong

Summary

The author shares their extensive collection of shoes, emphasizing the importance of having the appropriate type of shoe for every activity and outfit.

Abstract

The author expresses their love for shoes and their belief in having the right pair for every occasion and color-coordinated outfits. They mention owning various types of shoes, including walking shoes, lounging shoes, seasonal shoes, and even shoes for specific activities like pickleball and dancing. The author humorously compares their shoe collection to that of Imelda Marcos, the former First Lady of the Philippines, who is said to have owned 3,000 pairs of shoes. Despite acknowledging that their feet are a small percentage of their body, the author justifies their extensive shoe collection by stating that one-fourth of the body's bones are in the feet.

Opinions

  • The author believes in having the appropriate type of shoe for every activity and color-coordinated outfits.
  • The author owns a wide variety of shoes, including walking shoes, lounging shoes, seasonal shoes, and shoes for specific activities.
  • The author humorously compares their shoe collection to that of Imelda Marcos, the former First Lady of the Philippines, who is said to have owned 3,000 pairs of shoes.
  • The author acknowledges that their feet are a small percentage of their body but justifies their extensive shoe collection by stating that one-fourth of the body's bones are in the feet.
  • The author uses humor and puns throughout the article to express their love for shoes.
  • The author encourages readers to enjoy their story and even includes a YouTube video related to shoes.
  • The author promotes a cost-effective AI service that provides the same performance and functions as ChatGPT Plus (GPT-4) for just 6/month (with a special offer for 1/month).

These Boots Were Made for Walkin’

The story of a “shoes” horse

Author’s photo of grey-toned sneakers lounging

What’s made of leather, a foot long, and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe.

And my collection of shoes is nothing to sneeze at. I firmly believe in having precisely the appropriate type of shoe for the activity and color-coordinated outfits. As a result, I have steadily increased the size of my shoe collection. I have shoes for walking, shoes for lounging, shoes for snow, shoes for rain, pickleball shoes, dancing shoes, sneakers of different colors, seasonal shoes such as sandals, different styles such as slip-ons, boots, etc. shoes for costumes, like cowboy boots. I even have shoes to gas up the car in.

Photo by Thibault Penin on Unsplash

I went to the AmPm gas station this morning. The first pump was out of order, and so was the second, and third. I went into the mini-mart and asked the clerk, “Have you got your pumps on?” She said, “No, I’m wearing Ugg Boots.”

You’d think that if my feet are proportionately a small percentage of my body, then my closet should reflect that math, but no. I have to swaddle the feet in excess. It’s a feet-ish. (Not as bad as the First Lady of the Philippines, Imelda Marcos, who is said to have had 3000 pairs which are now on display at the Marikina Shoe Museum in Manila.) I calculate it a slightly different way. Since one-fourth of my body’s bones are in my feet, I should allocate one-fourth of my closet to shoes. Makes sense? (The truth is feet are 1.43% of the body for men and 1.33 % of a female’s body.)

A man with two left feet walks into a shoe store and says, “Got any flip-flips?”

Photo by Ben on Unsplash

So much for flippant remarks.

What did the hat say to the shoe? I’ll go ahead, you go on afoot.

I hope you get a kick out of my story!

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Shoes
Feet
Humor
Shoe Love Mag
Fashion
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