There’s Healing In The Natural World

There’s healing in how we choose to deal with personal grief. We all choose our own pathways in order to find our way home

“Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Forget about those who don’t. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would most likely be worth it.”

‘If you get a chance, take it!’

How often had we had that chance, but didn’t, for whatever reason?

Here is a wonderful story about a woman who did just that. She took a chance that most of us would not have made in her circumstances.

She’s a friend’s mother, a nurse

Having just gone through a difficult divorce, she was just about to retire when she discovered she had stage four breast cancer.

Her children were grown up, two married, the other two intent on their careers, and she was very much on her own.

Powerful chemo was offered to her in order to give her some time, but it wasn’t a solution…just time.

She wasn’t at all interested in buying time…not that kind!

Miriam’s thoughts turned to all the things she had wanted to do with her life in her retirement years, places to see, hobbies to pursue, but now that she was faced with her mortality, she felt it had to be much more than that.

She was still feeling well, perhaps not as energetic as she’d once been, but ask many people in their sixties and there’s a good chance they would tell you they feel much the same.

The call to give back…

One thing she’d dreamed of doing was living and working in Arnhem Land, a spectacular ancient land in the Northern Territory, rich in Aboriginal culture, rich in everything, to be honest, except for many of the things that we take for granted.

She and her husband, a doctor, had visited the area, and were totally captivated by the people, and their needs.

They were spellbound by the unmatched colors of nature, the variety of flora and fauna, and the untouched beauty of the land, so much so that they promised each other they would spend the last of their working years, giving back to the people they felt needed it most.

That idea was now in cold storage

She and her husband had parted ways some years back, and now she was sick, and advised that without treatment, her life was going to be cut a whole lot shorter.

Still she opted for no chemo. She was not convinced of the benefits, instead she massaged her heart with the the need to give back.

Moving to the territory as a volunteer, as opposed to working, would get around the problem of passing a health test.

So filling herself full of enthusiasm, she called her children together, told them of the two things they needed to know, her sickness, followed quickly by her plans, before they could protest.

Imagine that!

As you can imagine, there was much protestation. What would happen if she got really sick? Had she really thought this through?

She assured them she had.

She assured them that her mind was made up. This was something she had to do before death, because, apart from producing her children, she felt that she had never really give back to the world.

Imagine any nurse having such thoughts, never having given back. It’s what they do every day of their lives!

Still, she wanted to do it and now was the time.

Within weeks she was on her way, leaving behind a fearful, but in some ways proud family.

The Territory…in so many ways short-changed

One of the issues she soon got involved in was setting up staff homes for medics in the region.

Without decent places to stay, the lives of staff, and consequently patients, were put at risk.

Chronic staff shortages throughout the territory meant that Miriam was soon providing locum help just to allow some doctors and nurses to take even a moderate amount of much-needed leave.

She was coping far better than she could ever have imagined.

Surprise!

It’s amazing how one determined individual can change a whole environment.

Despite the bitterness of their parting, her husband eventually decided he too should fulfil his promise.

He is now living and working in the territory with her, sometimes in a medical capacity, but often in an adversarial role, using his skills to promote fair outcomes for a society of people often marginalized.

It’s been at least seven years since Miriam left Canberra, and I only catch up with the family on occasions. There’s no mention of breast cancer, and I leave it at that.

What I hear lots about are the changes their parents have brought about through their now-chosen people.

I see lots of photos, and that is enough for me.

If she were to die tomorrow, I have no doubt she would exit this world surrounded by a great deal of well-deserved love.

What more can any of us ask for?

When I was 16, I felt very relieved to discover cinema. It was like an island where I could see life and death from another perspective. Every young person should be interested in that island. It’s a beautiful place.

Maybe we all should be!