YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA

The Worst Story on Medium That I Can’t Get Enough of

Medium’s version of The Room

If you fail in epic proportions, it may just become a winning failure — The Rules of the Internet Rule #16 4chan

The story you are reading was not written with any malice. It’s purpose is not to shame or humiliate anyone. It’s to celebrate an extraordinary story.

I’ve debated writing this for months. I’ve showed it to a few people. Half think it’s just awful. Half see what I do in the story. I’ve read the story a dozen times and notice something new every time.

To prepare for the story you are going to read, we must talk about The Room for a moment. If you’ve never seen or heard of The Room, watch this. If you have seen The Room, you are going to watch it any anyways because you know it’s incredible.

This is not a gag reel. This isn’t just slick editing. This is the movie. You really need to see the whole thing. I love The Room. I attended midnight showings where everyone dresses like their favorite character. I go as Danny and leer at people while saying inappropriate things and randomly yelling out “He’s going to jail!”

You are now briefed on what to expect from what you are about to read. It gets torturous in the middle, but you have to push through. Because the end is so remarkably unsatisfying. I ask you not to highlight the story as that would ruin it. Please copy paste your favorite lines in the comments. Here it is:

A spectacular concept to disconnect after your creative journey.

I debated informing the author that I that I was writing this. Someone pointed out to me that the author is not a native English speaker.

“Hi, I want a write a story about your story because it’s so bad that I like it.”

Yeah, no. A browser game saved this man’s career. I’m not even going to try.

How did it save his career? No fucking clue. For all the words he used in that thing he never bothered explaining how. Which is my favorite part.

What the fuck was he talking about! How does one even write like that? What sequence of writing tools churned out such lines as:

However, when we deal with the mind and emotions, everything becomes much more complicated due to the subjective nature that we apply to it

Let me explain, due to this great demand, many ideas arose and many possibilities to cover, so wasting time was something inconceivable.

Yes? Yes! Yes?!? Why?

The day I first read it I shook my head. Mainly because I had stuff denied by this publication. This was okay, but mine wasn’t up to par?

I couldn’t stop reading it. I kept coming back. Or as the author would say,

“In the course of our journey, I found when when I came back to the Medium environment. I found myself surprised at the number of times myself returned to the story multiples of times.”

If something is so bad it captivates you like that is it really bad? Yeah, it’s terrible but I love it. I’ve read a few of the author's stories and those are terrible too but lacking that, “what the fuck did I just read?” feeling.

What’s going on in this picture! Why?!

It’s like cars that are about to crash. You can’t look away. It captivated my imagination. It’s so weird.