The World Isn’t Going to Shine a Light on You

You have to get out there yourself and be bright

I would like to say I can be diplomatic in my writing but the truth is it’s too damn hard to sit back and not speak up. It’s difficult watching women willingly give up their individual power in the name of centuries old stereotypes.

When I’m passionate about something I can come across as bitchy. Sometimes that’s exactly the way I want to come across.

I’m extra passionate about not sitting on the sidelines watching women hold themselves back. I can’t do it without saying something and I have no idea what it takes to help shift their thinking.

I’d like to see women become strong on their own instead of raging against some machine that was instituted when men were hunters and women were cave wives.

That machine got rusty a long time ago and it is breakable now more than ever.

Recently I was personally invited to check out a brand new podcast put together by a group of women. I was excited to log on and hear what kinds of topics they’d be covering. I’m all for women getting out there and doing their thing.

Less than two minutes into the introduction episode the word ‘misogyny’ came up. I clicked out of the podcast and will never revisit it because focusing on such topics doesn’t interest me.

It’s difficult to hear women say they feel held down by their male counterparts because I believe in individuality and forging your own path. I also believe in manifestation — as long as you feel held back you will be.

As long as you’re comparing yourself to the opposite gender it will bother you if you’re not completely in line with their successes. So, how about just focusing on your own successes without bringing buzzwords into it and comparing yourselves to others?

I recently watched Michelle Obama’s documentary centered around her book, ‘Becoming.’ She made some pretty impactful statements about her journey, not just as the First Lady, but as a woman and a minority.

“We can’t afford to wait for the world to be equal to start feeling seen.”

If you believe women are the inferior gender, you will continue to operate as inferior, whether consciously or subconsciously.

If you feel like you’re being overlooked or discounted by certain male counterparts, go find new counterparts. Because clearly you’re hanging out in the wrong crowds.

If you carry yourself like a force to be reckoned with you will indeed become one because you’ll live out each day as that unbreakable force.

When you operate on your own individuality you will be recognized. If you make a statement that needs to be heard, you’ll be heard because you won’t let someone else mute you.

Men don’t ‘get to’ do anything just because they’re men. They just do it. If we just do it and are seen as bitches, let them see us as bitches….but only from behind, while we keep moving forward.

Yes, the world has historically been biased against women. But the key word there is historically.

No one is rewriting the history books of the past but we women should be writing the ones of the future. If we aren’t working to change things for ourselves then who will?

Creating our own futures does not include wallowing over the inability to be seen. It includes making ourselves seen and stepping over those who don’t see us, not stepping on them. It involves joining forces with those who do see us.

Those who see us are out there, take my word for it. You just won’t notice them if you’re always focused on the buzzwords that subconsciously hold you back.

I can honestly say I have never felt gender bias in my lifetime. If it was present I wasn’t aware of it so it never affected me as a girl, a young woman, or a grown woman.

If I wanted to play soccer on the boys team as a little girl, I went out on the field and played. If I wanted to be heard, I spoke. If I wanted to be seen I made a spectacle of myself.

Being a woman is such a blessing to me, and being a woman who writes is an even bigger blessing. We have the ability to touch people we don’t even know, and possibly change their lives with a few words.

Women need to make themselves visible rather than wait to be recognized. We don’t need to be the First Lady or Oprah Winfrey to do that. You can sit right there in your chair and make an impact.

Rather than feeling invisible because you’re a woman, make your own presence count because one else is going to do it for you.

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