The Villain's Mask: The Hero Hiding in Plain Sight
4 Steps to Changing a ‘Good vs. Evil’ Mindset
“What were you expecting? A monster?”
— George Higgins (played by James Gandolfini) after removing his mask for the first time.
(From the 1999 movie, 8MM, starring Nicholas Cage)
YES, I was expecting a monster.
After all, the character in 8MM who asks this question committed a monstrous act.
He raped and killed an innocent girl. He filmed the dastardly act as it was happening.
Other people paid money to view the film. A film, may I remind you, whose central plot was the rape and murder of a teenage girl.
So, YES, a monster is EXACTLY what I was expecting.
Since I was a little girl, I visualized the enemy, a.k.a. — the bad guy/monster, as a mean-looking, sinister villain who secretly crept about the city, waiting to catch me at my most vulnerable moment.
Reality, however, is different.
Enemies don’t look mean. Not always.
An enemy could be the nice lady next door, who smiles in your face.
An enemy could be the kind man who you frequently see shopping at the grocery store each week.
An enemy could be even closer to you.
Like your mother — your father — your sister —your brother.
Or your son or daughter.
Even your spouse.
It could be you.
Reality Check
As an adult, I realized the mental images we have as children often don’t match with reality.
And by the time we figure out some of life’s harsher truths, we’ve been hurt and scarred because we didn’t see the world as it is.
Which brings me, full circle, back to James Gandolfini’s line in 8MM:
“What were you expecting? A monster?”
The Spectrum of Good to Evil
We, as a society, need to stop perpetuating the idea that good and evil are opposites.
Why? Because, like everything else in life, good and evil exist on a spectrum. Seeing the ‘good vs. evil’ in a strict dichotomy creates dissonance between our fixed, false mindset and the fluidity of reality.
More importantly, it distances us from embracing the universal human experience of life — which comes with all types of good and evil.
No single human being walking the planet is 100% saint or 100% sinner. No single human being who has walked the planet in the past is 100% saint or 100% sinner. The same concept applies to future humans who will walk the planet.
Hero? Villain? Both exist within each of us.
Throw out the dichotomy of good versus evil.
Now, replace it with a continuum or a sliding scale.
This sliding scale more appropriately matches our encounters with good, evil, and everything in between.
Our daily lives are filled with variability and uncertainty.
Lying, withholding the truth, deception, and hidden agendas are, sadly, something we all wrestle with day-to-day.
Fortunately, we also encounter love, laughter, affection, and selflessness.
Dealing with all these things places us at varying degrees on a spectrum — NOT at one, fixed, static point.
Save Labels for Jars, Not People
Subconsciously, I mentally label others under the stark ‘good vs. evil’ dichotomy, casting my friends as villains or angels … and find myself astonishingly disappointed or astonishingly surprised as I get to know them.
My ever-vigilant conscience reminds the conscious ‘me’ to quit doing this. Just because someone is genuine, honest, and compassionate, does not mean he or she is without fault. And that’s fine!
The truth is, we are all just one step away from committing an atrocious act or miserably failing a moral test life throws our way. I’m not being cynical or mean. It’s simply true.
‘Us’ vs. ‘Them’ Mindset — The Dangers Of
The real danger is when we assume only monstrous human beings kill, hurt, or ruin other people. Once we adopt an ‘us vs. them’ mindset, we begin to think of ourselves as perfect and blameless. These become blinders, stealing our self-accountability, and blinding us to reality.
The Antidote to ‘Us’ vs. ‘Them'
To counteract this assumptive and polarizing mindset, we need to fight it consciously. Follow the four steps below to change your ‘good vs. evil’ mindset.
Over time, it will sink into your subconscious mind and become second nature.
How to Change a ‘Good vs. Evil’ Mindset
- Before you can change anything in life, you must be aware of the situation. Be vigilant to your current mindset, always remaining self-aware.
2. Question all assumptions.
- When needed, change them.
- Your mindset/belief system is similar to your laptop which constantly requires an update. Do it often.
3. Refrain from judging others before hearing all sides of the story, especially the opposing side.
- Everyone has unseen reasons for their displayed behavior. Do your intentions always manifest through your actions? Neither do everyone else’s.
4. When a friend, spouse, or family member does you wrong, remember that human nature is a double-sided coin.
- Angel/devil. Halo/horns. These concepts are two sides of the same coin. Front and back of the same book. Entrance and exit to the same house. Get it?
- Keep reminding yourself of this paradox until it becomes second nature. Trust me, it will.
From Personal Experience…
Take it from me, consciously reframing your mindset does work. It just takes time. You must persevere and remind yourself (many times) about your updated beliefs.
Time will reward you, I promise. One day, without a conscious reminder, you’ll respond to a familiar situation with your new, evolved mindset.
Example: A friend doesn’t show up for a movie date. You’re stuck at the theater alone.
Old mindset: What a bitch! She’s so inconsiderate.
New mindset: She must be busy and forgot to call. I need to get a hold of her to make sure everything’s alright. And since I’m already here, and I wanted to see this movie, I’ll stay and watch it.
Final Thoughts
Good and evil exist within everyone. The trick is making sure your decisions leave you closer to the ‘good’ side of the spectrum.
In life, ‘cut and dry’ is best left on the kitchen counter with the dinner vegetables.
Very few situations in life are black and white. Most are colorful and dynamic, which is a beautiful thing!
Tread carefully and stay balanced.
Source(s):
Nelson, K. (2018, January 24). What is Good or Evil? The Good and Evil Continuum, Spectrum, Scale or Degrees. Evolve Consciousness. Retrieved October 15, 2023, from https://evolveconsciousness.org/good-evil-good-evil-continuum-spectrum-scale-degrees/
Shumacher, J. (Director). (1999). 8MM [Motion picture]. Columbia Pictures.
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