avatarMyriam Ben Salem🦋

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The Very First Limiting Belief I Destroyed: Homophobia

I was stupid and thought the time has come to apologize to the homosexual community.

Photo by christian buehner on Unsplash

There is one grand lie — that we are limited. The only limits we have are the limits we believe. ~ Wayne Dyer

Today, I decided to explore one of the uncomfortable topics about which to talk. Like discrimination and different kinds of stigmatization, discussing homophobia takes tons of openness! I am taking the risk nonetheless!

Let’s start from the beginning, shall we?

How is homophobia created? Like any other limiting belief, it starts in the household. Interestingly, in Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, homosexuality has been considered sinful — at least for the conservative groups.

More to the point, if you were raised in a religious family system, chances are high you were vehiculated the message by your caregivers, and have built a biased algorithm around homosexual communities in your subconscious program.

For the quick story, I was listening to the radio and joined the debate during the last 15 minutes. It was enough to feel disgusted. The host and his guests were discussing a bill of law about legalizing homosexuality.

The arguments of the opponents were revolting. They were talking about it as if it was a virus or a demon to kill at all costs.

Today, I decide to admit my crime: I used to be an idiot. I used to be homophobic for 90% of my existence on earth. It is the reason why I can empathize. I will forever be ashamed of this limiting belief and will never be able to explain how fulfilled I feel for having recovered from my distortion!

After an out-of-body experience where I saw all the lies of my unhealthy ego, I needed to heal, I took three months to take care of the most obvious scars and gain some strength for the painful work waiting for me.

Evolving my outlook began with re-evaluating my algorithm on homophobia during a self-awareness exercise.

By unhealthy ego, I am referring to the false self we create as an adaptation to our environment and the discrimination against our intrinsic worth by our caregivers. It is one of the main sources of our suffering. Should you be interested, I explored the topic in detail here:

How does it happen?

One needs to ask oneself two trivial questions:

  • Is the homosexual community hurting anyone by their sexual orientation? It is similar to asking oneself whether anyone’s heterosexuality hurts somebody else. Note that I don’t even use the straight label. The answer is as trivial as the question: No.
  • If I am homophobic, am I violating any universal principle? The answer is: Yes. I am violating the principle of human dignity. I am violating the principle of free will if we consider there is a choice at all. We only need to observe the animals’ kingdom to realize homosexuality is natural. I am violating the principle of fairness. The homosexual community suffers from discrimination and marginalization daily.

In summary, we are not only violating one or two but three universal principles. What does such a realization activate? Tapping into our emotional right brain and triggering conscious shame.

At the same time, this magic and painful awakening create a feeling of compassion for homosexual people. Most importantly, it gives birth to writing a new algorithm in our subconscious program, which would replace the old deformed one.

Taking one’s responsibility to change what we were not responsible for creating in the first place — our subconscious program — is probably the highest level of strength and wisdom.

Takeaway

You don’t want to be like the person I was, by holding onto some limiting beliefs you never chose in the first place. By working on your conditioning patterns, you’ll slowly but surely unleash the servant leader in you.

S/he is only waiting for you to take your power back and clean the dust of the lifetime of conditioning. Should you be interested, I explored a non-exhaustive list of their virtues here:

Dear kind souls: know that you are the secret weapon to reverse superficiality, cruelty, selfishness, and immorality. We all come to this physical reality, spend some time, and go. The question is:

How would you like to be remembered?

If you enjoyed your read and that you can get excited about the idea, we can become email friends here! Also, if you find value in my creations and are willing to support me, you can become a patron here: Myriam Ben Salem is creating Blogs | Patreon

Gratitude

As usual, I want to thank all of you, dear readers, who decided to stop by and give this piece some of your precious time!

Also, my gratitude goes to GiaB, its wonderful conductor Victor Sarkin, and all the devoted editors who have all my respect and love!

Psychology
Self Improvement
Relationships
Life
Love
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