The Universe is Looking Out for Your Success

Looking up when the rain is pouring down

I have spent too many years suffering to be shaken by quarantine or a virus. I have lost too much in my life to worry about the pay cuts my family is taking. Life kicked my ass and rolled me down the street long before COVID-19 arrived. The advice I offer in this article doesn’t come from an epiphany of a 6-week quarantine, but from living with 15 years of uncertainty and doubt.

My best friend was murdered by her husband when I was in my early 30s. She was my son’s Godmother. I carried the pain of her death like a ten-pound sack of potatoes. She was a much better person than I thought I was. Her husband presented as the perfect partner. I could never wrap my head around this trauma.

A decade later my brother, who was also my best friend, died from lupus. The following year my nephew, who was my Godson, died in a motorcycle accident. A year after that, my family lost my sister’s husband to pancreatic cancer, which broke what was left of my heart.

Following all those deaths, I just couldn’t climb out my darkness. Money problems, strained relationships, required surgery, and facing mental health issues kept me wondering if God gave a damn about me. At one point, my husband and I were paying $1,500 per month in credit card debt. Mind you, my husband and I both have Ph.Ds.

Looking Up When the Rain Is Pouring Down

After a decade and a half of crisis after crisis in my life, I began to see the rainbow. The past few years, life has been much kinder, but, far from perfect. I have never given up on myself or life. Even in the darkest of times, I made sure I had something to look forward to each day, each week, and each year.

When your life muse seems to be throwing a temper tantrum, reprioritize, reinvent, and educate yourself.

I’ve learned some valuable lessons about life. As one great Medium motivator, Rasheed Hooda stated, “the Universe is looking out for your success”. I understood this even while I was walking through the fire and questioning God. I could mention five positive critical happenings for each crisis that I mentioned. Even though I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, I felt the strength to keep walking.

I learned three valuable lessons over those dark years. They, undoubtedly, have me keeping my cool right now. When your life muse seems to be throwing a temper tantrum, reprioritize, reinvent, and re-educate yourself.

Re-prioritize your life

When you cannot live life on your terms, re-prioritize how you live your life. Fighting to do life the way you want it will make you feel like a failure. You don’t have to be a failure. You just have to go with the flow.

In business terms, reprioritizing would be considered pivoting. In Freudian psychology, it is referred to as sublimation. In spirituality, it is called acceptance. How do you know that this is where you are supposed to be? Because this is where you are.

When life is not happening the way we want, we must avoid the tendency to focus on lack. We must respond to the half-full glass instead of half empty. Even if the glass is only 10% full and 90% empty, we must respond to 10%. That is where the universe wants to draw your attention.

How do you know that this is where you are supposed to be? Because this is where you are.

In the first three weeks of quarantine, I whined about having to cancel my trips to visit my husband in New York, where he is living. When we agreed to live apart so that he could have his dream job, we didn’t plan for long-term separation.

While I do miss my husband dearly, I am grateful that the universe already had positioned me to endure this time. My adult son moved in with us just a year ago. His presence was the determining factor for my husband taking the job in NY since he knew I would not be alone. Now, my son is the perfect quarantine housemate.

My relationship with my son was once strained. The time we get to spend together now is a gift to us both. We capitalize on it. My relationship with him is now a priority. Before the COVID-19 my priority was visiting my husband every chance I could get.

Come to terms with whatever is left in your glass and realize that it may be more reflective of your potential joy.

Come to terms with whatever is left in your glass and realize that it may be more reflective of your potential joy. Instead of fighting to keep doing life the way you have been doing it, try to find the wave and jump in.

Reinvent yourself

Reprioritizing life usually means that who you thought you were is outdated. In dark times, many people are unconsciously reinvented. They may become more drawn to conflict, engage in unhealthy habits, or spend time with people who do not have good intentions. They change for the worse.

When you consciously take charge of the reinvention, you will change for the better. Work toward being healthier in some way. Change your career or lifestyle. Just because you can’t control the most important aspects of your life doesn’t mean you can’t control your life. If you can only see one way to move forward in your life, then therein lies a problem.

Just because you can’t control the most important aspects of your life doesn’t mean you can’t control your life.

In my darkest moment, after I lost my brother, I became a runner. I ran all over town because the motion cleared my mind. I never cried while I ran. I eventually ran a marathon.

I later had a surgery and was concerned about getting back to normal. My doctor asked me to give her a measure of normal. I told her if I could run another marathon, I would feel normal. The universe had my back. One year after my surgery, I ran my second marathon. Maybe I’m on deck for a COVID-19 marathon when this is done.

Re-educate yourself

Knowledge is power, and obtaining knowledge is easier than ever. There is nothing new under the sun. Chances are, the situation you are most concerned about has been addressed before. The feeling of isolation feeds hopelessness and depression. Learning about how your predicament already has been addressed can go a long way.

You know you are not the only one who has had to make it through this darkness when you educate yourself. Sure, everyone is going through COVID-19, but you may feel hopeless because your parents have stuck you in the basement to prevent contamination. Maybe your wedding date had to be canceled or a funeral had to be planned. Maybe you are going to foreclose on your home.

Tragedy should not be minimized or ignored. Pain should be addressed. Addressing pain through education is more practical than following social media. Knowledge goes a longer way than social media sympathy.

Read professional web sites, books, or take online classes to help you understand your situation better. Don’t assume that you know everything about it just because you are going through it. You may know how it feels, but you may not know how to stop how it feels.

Life As We Know It

We are living life as we know it at this point in time. We are comparing it to life as we knew it not long ago. We long for the comfort of prediction and certainty. We mourn the disruption of our comfort.

However, life has no guarantee of particular outcomes. But, I do believe that the universe wants you to succeed. But, you have to figure out for yourself the path of success that is synchronous with the universe.

References

Bakari, R. (2020). Glasses 90% empty, 10% full. Illumination on Medium. https://readmedium.com/glasses-90-empty-10-full-1af9e6894ba.

Hooda, R. (2020). How to improve your stories: Ask for help. Illumination on Medium. https://readmedium.com/how-to-improve-your-stories-ask-for-help-44e334c5ea0b