The Universal Language of Gratitude

For us Americans, November means one thing: Thanksgiving.

It seems ironic that we have put one of our most immoral and offensive holidays on such a pedestal. But then again, Americans haven’t always been the north star of great morals.

The one thing we do get right, however, is the celebration of gratitude for our lives and our loved ones at this time of year.

I won’t lie, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

And it’s my favorite holiday for the simplest of reasons, a reason that makes it sound silly to rely on a holiday for:

Nothing makes my heart fuller than sitting around a dinner table, with family, friends, and loved ones sharing delicious food, and sharing love.

I feel the tears building in the back of my eyes just thinking and writing about these fond memories. I envision the many tables I’ve sat at and hear laughter. I smell my Uncle Larry’s’ apple crumble heating up in the oven. I hear Norah Jones serenading the group as my dad pulls the cork out of another bottle of Pinot Noir. I taste my Aunt Beth’s chunky, mushroom-filled sourdough stuffing, thankful today is a day calories don’t exist.

I see the tall vase of white Hydrangeas my mom trimmed on the table. I hear the Grateful Dead jam session that breaks out as my Uncle John unpacks his guitar from its case (yes, quite literally Uncle John’s Band for all my dead head friends out there). I witness each person, going around the table, sharing something in their life that they are grateful for, despite the hardships we each have faced. I feel this gratitude with my whole being.

And of course, every family holiday is dysfunctional. Take any family, mine included, and you’ll laugh at the ongoing list of flaws. It’s part of the deal.

But the practice of gratitude is pure.

And that gratitude doesn’t need to be dependent on one day a year. Sometimes it takes stepping out of the usual routine and practices to realize gratitude can be practiced any time, anywhere.

Traveling overseas, I’ve started to find myself practicing gratitude on a more daily basis. I’ve found myself relying on it, to find more comfort in the discomfort.

When in our comfort zones, we often forget to thank whatever higher power we may or may not believe in, for the roof over our heads, our friends and families, our clothes, our jobs, and all our possessions.

So Thanksgiving is often the helpful reminder to pause and appreciate these things.

But for me, living by myself on a tropical island halfway around the world from home, I’m reminded through missing all of these daily comforts, how lucky I have been to have them at all.

I FaceTime with my grandma or best friend, and immediately leave the call thankful to Steve Jobs and the team at Apple who made it possible for me to see the faces of my loved ones.

The hosts at my homestay surprise me with a cup of tea one morning, and I immediately feel lucky to be staying in a place with such hospitality.

A stranger in my yoga class drops the necessary props on my mat, noticing my lack of interest in getting off my back, and I think about how one act of kindness can mean so much.

I receive a message from a new friend and fellow traveler just checking in to see how I’m doing, and I am instantly humbled that someone I barely know is looking out for me.

I see locals living in the smallest homes, six family members sharing one bedroom, who still offer to feed me dinner with the happiest light in their eyes, and I feel so blessed to have grown up with my own bedroom.

It’s easy for us to take our lives for granted most of the time.

Even these memories I’m sharing, are just a piece of my observations overseas. I could equally talk about the scooter driver who made me fear for my life, the local food that made me constipated for five days, or the tears I cried when I felt totally alone and without a purpose the other day.

Life is difficult. No matter where you are or who you are.

But we are alive. And sometimes it’s important to remind ourselves that that alone is a blessing.

Travel strips away all the comforts of your day-to-day life, and in turn, makes you reflect on how special all those comforts are.

It reveals the struggles of people all over the world, making your own struggles no less of value, but considered with a bit more perspective.

Every person in this world understands the meaning of gratitude.

A sincere thank you — in the form of words, of a hug, or two hands on the heart — can be translated universally.

And I’m grateful for gratitude, because it’s the one thing we have aside from love, to communicate heart to heart with others.

It feels good to be grateful. And it feels good to receive the gratitude of others.

So for the month of November, wherever you are in the world, in your usual life or traveling somewhere in the world where Thanksgiving has never been heard of before, try incorporating a bit more gratitude in your daily life.

Even taking one minute when you wake up in the morning to close your eyes and think about something in this world that you are grateful for today, will fill your heart up with a bit more love.

A little bit of love becomes a lot of love very quickly.

The more I practice gratitude, the more I find myself wanting to outpour with love for those around me, trying not to startle too many people with “I’m thinking of you!” texts.

It’s only November 8th, so by the time Thanksgiving rolls around, all the Americans who have been doing this simple exercise could be filled with so much gratitude, they aren’t even sure it can be put into words! But it will be felt by those at your dinner table. And that’s the greatest gift of all.

This year, I’ll be in Bali on November 24th. And that’s incredibly sad for me.

I’ll miss the tradition that has always brought me so much joy. The people who feel like home.

However, I’m in Bali! I’m spending time living a dream I could have never imagined for myself, pushing myself to be better with each new day. So giving thanks seems only practical.

Plus, I really meant it when I said I’m thankful for Steve Jobs. If I really wanted to sit through the whole day of Thanksgiving through my iPhone I could.

Then again, as I also really meant, family is dysfunctional. Maybe travel is a gift in disguise.

Gratitude knows no borders, no grudges, no pain. Gratitude is a beautiful gift. I’m grateful for the opportunity and ability to be exploring new corners of the world right here and now, even when it means changing old traditions for new experiences.

May your November 2022 be filled with more love, more presence, and more gratitude.