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Abstract
take it to friend’s house</li><li>place squirrel in cage in backyard</li><li>party happening that night</li><li>guests question our squirrel savior plan</li><li>might’ve been day-drunk</li><li>want to appease hot girl visitors</li><li>decide to release squirrel during party</li><li>countdown begins</li><li>squirrel escapes cage</li><li>out of nowhere cat grabs it</li><li>squirrel escapes cat’s jaw, jumps into pool</li><li>can’t climb out</li><li>friend tries to help, gets bitten, draws blood</li><li>use broom to lift squirrel out</li><li>squirrel stubborn AF finally jumps onto cabana roof and disappears</li><li>party people relieved</li><li>we save
Options
d the squirrel — now we heroes</li><li>go inside for more terrible swill</li><li>wonder what life has in store for Squirrely</li><li>maybe find family or start new one maybe come back for nuts and vegan drinks</li><li>either way, hope Squirrely has a not-sweaty life now</li><li>clean up backyard, turn off lights</li><li>see cat with bloody mouth</li><li>didn’t tell a soul</li><li>at least he’s not sweaty</li></ul><p id="6ff0"><a href="undefined">J.J. Pryor</a></p><p id="e084"><a href="https://jjpryor.substack.com/"><b>If you want to hear more strange (and hopefully amusing) stories, please signup for my free newsletter!</b></a></p></article></body>
