avatarRavneet Kaur

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</figure><p id="d15c">But I was having trouble even doing that. I started cheating, letting the reminder go off and then tapping it “complete” without doing anything. My husband would give me occasional reminders, but he never pushed hard, and I was grateful for that. I would hate for him to start resenting me for not trying hard enough. He always thanked me when I told him I was going to drive, so I know it meant a lot to him. I felt I was letting him down by avoiding it so frequently.</p><p id="17d3">The thing was, I was still doing the best I could, even when that meant I did nothing. Maybe I wasn’t doing nothing though. I was <i>thinking</i> about getting in the car every day, which was difficult in itself. But I knew that was insufficient. The whole point of making a recurring calendar action was to prompt and inspire me to at least get into the car, even if I just got out again. I didn’t want to just think about it.</p><p id="d70e">Was getting into the car once a day too much to ask of myself? I hated to think of myself as lazy. The word is so dismissive and has such a negative connotation about the worth of a person, not just their ability or willingness to act.</p><p id="6ae3">Was I unwilling to get into the car or unable to? Both? Was my desire to avoid stirring up memories of past driving-related trauma outweighing my desire to drive? Probably. Stuff that happened decades ago was so vivid in my emotional memory bank that it was crippling my functioning in an aspect of life that most people get to take for granted.</p><figure id="b840"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*0gx_JW0juZED_Jo2"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@bastianp?utm_source=medium&amp;utm_medium=referral">Bastian Pudill</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&amp;utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure><p id="2466">I would go for such long periods of time without driving or even turning on the ignition that, when I finally had the courage to do so, my car usually wouldn’t start at all. I wanted to hide this from my husband, so I bought a jump-start device that can be charged up with a USB cable. It worked like a charm, which was both a good and bad thing.</p><p id="1d57">Good, in that I didn’t have to rely on someone else to get my car working again. Good, in that I could hide the ridiculous extent to which I was avoiding getting in my car and turning on the ignition. But not-so-good in that the device served as an enabler.</p><p id="8669">When I was able to build up my resolve enough to get into the car, turn the ignition on and pull out of the parking space, I often would just drive up and down the street of my housing development and pull back in. That was all I could bear.</p><p id="66a9">About once every two or three weeks I would venture out on the road. The speed limit on our street was 30 mph and I had read somewhere that the police don’t give speeding tickets unless you’re driving 12 mph over the speed limit. But other drivers almost invariably drove faster than that and tailgated.</p><p id="75de">When I would see a car close behind in the rear-view mirror, I was presented with a dilemma: Either speed up more than 42 mph, risking getting pul

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led over, or, continue driving at 42 mph and anger the person tailgating me. This would invariably bring back the memory of being chased, cornered and <a href="https://readmedium.com/cornered-at-gunpoint-my-fear-of-driving-amaxophobia-45c79ae4baa9">having my life threatened by another driver</a> and/or being accused of <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-hit-a-pedestrian-fear-of-driving-amaxophobia-e42aebed8f0c">running over a pedestrian</a>. And then there was the ever-present fear of having a car crash that would kill someone, which was ingrained in me from the moment I started learning how to drive.</p><p id="8c49">I was in a no-win situation.</p><p id="5db1">A friend once told me he was uncomfortable with my driving because he could tell I was nervous. He said I always white-knuckled the steering wheel, which was true. I did it without being conscious of it, and I didn’t really become aware of it until he told me.</p><p id="54c5">Full disclosure: This is a difficult, embarrassing topic and I used the past tense to describe my struggle. I would have written in the present tense if I was being truly honest. I am struggling with this <i>now</i>. I am writing about it to put it outside of me, to externalize it, hopefully in a way that will help me process it better, to tell my brain that what happened then is unlikely to happen again.</p><div id="c7f9" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/cornered-at-gunpoint-my-fear-of-driving-amaxophobia-45c79ae4baa9"> <div> <div> <h2>Cornered at Gunpoint: My Fear of Driving (Amaxophobia)</h2> <div><h3>The aftermath of being chased and caught</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*mxT-Euno_l4PeMD6)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="7b62" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-hit-a-pedestrian-fear-of-driving-amaxophobia-e42aebed8f0c"> <div> <div> <h2>I Hit a Pedestrian? My Fear of Driving (Amaxophobia)</h2> <div><h3>Nightmare in a Parking Garage</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*zGv8g6UjHfqZ2081)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><h2 id="7b70">Follow me on Substack for more content:</h2><div id="6130" class="link-block"> <a href="https://substack.com/@douglaskwon"> <div> <div> <h2>Douglas Kwon | Substack</h2> <div><h3>I'm a queer, biracial survivor of...stuff. I write about my not-so-great experiences as well as things that bring me…</h3></div> <div><p>substack.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*fAQNieJuEiCpHYfv)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

The Unforgettable Wonder of the Canadian Rockies

Mountains make us feel so insignificant

Image by Author -En route to Banff national park

Beaming glacier-covered peaks, pristine lakes, crystal water streams and waterfalls, all of this bundled in one part of the earth is quite a spectacle and leaves you short of words to describe the amazement.

There is a unique charm and wonder in the Canadian Rockies. Their popularity soared due to the expansion of Canadian Pacific Railways (CPR) in the west. To attract tourists from across the country, rail routes were built across the scenic lakes and peaks surrounded by picturesque settings.

Canada’s first National Park- Banff national park

While laying tracks in the Rockies, CPR workers came across hot water and steam flowing out of a cave on the slopes of Sulphur mountain, now known as the Cave and Basin National Historic Site. The hot and mineral-rich pools provided relief to the weary bodies of workers.

The discovery of these pools was an important moment in Canadian history. Due to a dispute in the ownership, the government had to intervene which led to the creation of a reserve to protect the springs and it’s surrounding area, and thus the formation of Canada’s first national park -Banff National Park.

Banff national park was named after the town of Banffshire in Scotland, which was the birthplace of the CPR’s first president George Stephen.

Image by Author -Beautiful town of Banff

The Banff springs hotel

Now known as The Fairmont Banff springs, was the vision of CPR’s vice president William Cornelius for a luxury stay in the Rockies. Also a National Historic site of Canada, it was the largest hotel in the world when it first opened in 1888. This Architectural marvel is a sight to behold. It’s aptly called the ‘Castle of the Rockies’.

Image by Author — Fairmont Banff springs

The Bow falls

Walking up to these cascading falls along the banks of the bow river was filled with breathtaking views of the river, the falls and the surrounding mountains.

Image by Author-Bow Falls

The Johnston Canyon

Carved by thousands of years of water erosion, it is a popular natural attraction in Banff national park. The hike up to the falls is quite a thrill offering breathtaking views of the canyon and the flowing stream on the downslopes. There is also a small cave that gives you closer access to the falls.

Image by Author-Johnston Canyon, lower falls

Lake Louise

Our next spot was Lake Louise, a beautiful glacial lake nestled between towering mountains. There was so much peace in simply observing the calm lake and the turquoise colour of the water. The pine trees add rustic charm and rocks are placed around the shore so people can sit and enjoy.

Image by Author -Lake Louise
Image by Author -Lake Louise

The Quaint town of Canmore

This idyllic town with its unique charm is at the heart of Canada’s Rocky Mountain Region. Local shops and restaurants with majestic mountains in the backdrop and a laid-back atmosphere make it a perfect setting.

Also came across a beautiful art gallery by local artist, Ken Hoehn and was left mesmerized by the incredible pieces of art. It is one of the most amazing art galleries I have ever seen.

The more I was wandering around the town, the more I fell in love with it. Also, the famous 3 sister mountains are an integral part of Canmore. We didn’t have time to stop by the park, but captured some beautiful views on the way.

Image by Author- The 3 sister peaks in Canmore
Image by Author -The Ken Hoehn Gallery

The Icefields parkway

Is one of the most beautiful and scenic drives in the world, from Banff to Jasper with a multitude of lakes and hikes to stop en route.

There were many small glacial-fed lakes, some with crystal clear water and the mirror reflections in the water were simply unbelievable. Here are some pictures.

Image by Author- The beautiful drive of Icefields Parkway
Image by Author -Mirror reflection of the Rockies in Bow Lake

The Beautiful town of Jasper

Our next stop was the beautiful town of Jasper. As soon as we reached we couldn’t fail to notice how different it was from the other towns. It was far less crowded and retains a traditional small-town relaxing and raw feel.

We stopped by a small but busy restaurant and the food was simply amazing. Even spotted some elks on the highway, our first wildlife spotting of the trip! Many people had stopped on the highway to watch the animals graze - such a simple act yet so much wonder. An Interesting fact about elks- Male elks have antlers that grow in spring and shed in winter.

By evening we reached our hotel. There was a beautiful and calm lake on the property and the scene above the lake was reflecting in the water. It was amazing, something one can gaze at for hours.

Image by Author -The beautiful town of Jasper (Elks grazing)

Maligne lake

One of the most stunning and calm lakes, encircled by the beautiful Rockies makes it one of the most photogenic locations in the region. Spirit island, a sacred area for the local indigenous communities, located on the shore of this lake offers picturesque landscape views.

The Serenity of the area amongst the Majestic Rockies is hard to go unnoticed. This was the last stop of our trip and there couldn’t have been a better way to end our trip.

Image by Author- Spirit Island at Maligne Lake

It’s hard to describe the true immensity of the Rockies

The Canadian Rockies are nothing short of stunning and our trip was memorable for all the right reasons.

Gazing out at the breathtaking size of the Rockies, the azure and cyan-colored lakes and the most breathtaking streams and waterfalls made an unforgettable experience long after returning home.

It’s inspiring how nature can make us feel small, unimportant, and grateful all at the same time, something we should feel more often than not.

I would like to share some of the amazing posts I read recently.

This article by Drashti Shroff on why social proof is the strongest asset for effective digital presence.

This article by Brother Frank on how failure helps accelerate growth.

Hope you find them helpful as much as I did.

I would also like to thank Dr. Preeti Singh for being a huge inspiration to write posts on Nature.

Become part of the medium community to stay inspired, motivated and connected. Join with my referral link here. Thanks!

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Canadian Rockies
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