The Ultimate Recipe for Happiness
It’s simple — only 3 ingredients and no preparation time!
I write on this platform every day. However, I needed a little inspiration for a topic this morning, so I read a few self-help articles on one of my favorite news aggregators.
Every article was about what you need to do to improve your life — how you can be happier, wealthier, skinnier, calmer, less stressed, less anxious, more productive, more creative, more resilient, etc.
What surprised me, was how the headlines sucked me in. I opened and started to read many of the articles. Me! The spiritual coach who’s supposed to have her act together.
I’m also guilty of writing this stuff myself. Someone once advised me to write about health, wealth, and relationships if I wanted to gain a significant following as a budding author. These are the things that everyone wants to have more of and be better at achieving.
Dare I say that the self-help and self-improvement industry may be fuelling your unhappiness? As the name suggests, you are not good enough and where you are now is not where you want to be. You need help! You need to improve! You need to strive! You need to get somewhere else!
This notion couldn’t be further from the truth. Is it any wonder that most people aren’t happy because they’re looking for something else or something more that they don’t already have?
The truth is that happiness is an inside job. Even though you might argue when I say that it will never come from anything outside of you, happiness can only EVER come from inside you; from a feeling that you have.
Another truth is that you can only ever experience happiness NOW, in the present moment. It’s not something to strive for in the future. It’s not down the road WHEN you achieve something or WHEN something happens. It’s a feeling that you have at the moment = NOW.
A series of moments where you feel happy will add up to a happy hour, a happy day, and happy life.
The Recipe
Let’s not set our objectives too high to start. A happy life will come all by itself if you simply focus on the happy moment now — this instant.
So how can you be happy at this very moment?
Firstly, stop telling yourself that you’re lacking anything at all or that you need any help. What if you believed that you are perfect as you are and that you already possess everything you will ever need to live a happy, content, successful life?
That is a tall order for most of you, but it’s true. God (substitute whatever word means “a higher power” or “the force behind life” for you) made you in his/her/their image. Would God really have made you anything less than perfect?
Secondly, try to be present in the moment. Mindfulness has gained massive popularity in recent years, and it’s nothing more than bringing your attention to the NOW. That is what mindfulness is all about.
The past is gone. It went well or it didn’t. We either have happy memories or regrets, but it’s pointless to dwell on the past. It’s over. Hopefully, you have learned a few lessons or have a few nice memories that you can bring with you to the present, but that’s it. It’s history!
And what about the future? Of course, you have to plan. If you’re taking a vacation in August, you need to ask for time off from work. But otherwise, it’s pointless to have your mind in the future worrying, overthinking, planning for the worst-case scenarios, etc. The future may never come. Or, despite all your thinking, a completely different future than the one you imagined might transpire.
When I run workshops, I often ask the attendees to estimate the percentage of time that their thinking is in the present moment. On average, the number I get is around 10%. If you can only be happy in the present moment, is it any wonder that most of us are not content when 90% of the time, our thoughts are in the past or in the future?
So get present in the moment NOW. Look around you and savor the beauty that you see in nature. Enjoy that cup of tea or coffee. Smile at your husband or wife. Pet your dog or cat. Try to find pleasure and happiness in the little things in life. Feel thankful and be grateful for what you do have in life. If you’re not careful, you might even find that you feel happy and content.
The Recipe
- Believe that you are perfect and that you already possess everything you will ever need to live a happy and content life.
- Live in the present moment and be grateful for what you have.
- Repeat.
You might soon feel that a series of happy moments add up to a happy hour, a happy day, a happy week, a happy month, or even a happy life.
And there’s nothing that you have to read, learn, do, or say! There’s no self-help course you need to complete. There are no steps to take or a list of bullet points to follow.
It is simple. Don’t make it more complicated than it is. Trust that you are perfect and already possess everything you’ll ever need and then be present in the moment.
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