The Ultimate Mindset Change You Need To Get In Shape
Coming from someone who once weighed 177 kg and now has 90, you should take this piece of advice.
Before we start, let me ask you something face-to-face:
Are you ready to adopt a healthy daily routine and habits, while taking care of your body and mind?
Or are you still seeking for a quick fix, stuck in unhealthy habits, daily junk food, excessive drinking, and promising to exercise next Monday, waiting for a miracle?
The choice is yours, my friend…
It’s all about how you decide to use those precious moments in your day.
Don’t flame others later.
Trigger
When I decided to change and focus on my health, I was in a pretty busy moment of my life,
Attending law school, working in a job that didn’t fulfill me and didn’t want to do it for longer,and obviously not satisfied with how I looked with the massive weight of 177kg.
One of the good things about my past self, is that even being very overweight for most of my life, I always liked to practice sports, especially competitive ones.
Even with my busy schedule and the big number on the scale, most of the days when I could, I would go for my favorite exercise ever,
boxing, trying to lose some of those kilos and clear my mind.
With hundreds of unhealthy habits, like hitting bars every night between uni classes, intending to have one beer with the guys but ending up with 10,
grabbing whatever quick-food I could during busy days without any preparation or discipline, and neglecting self-care, it never went as planned.
One day lifted me, the next dragged me down.
Always in constant battle.
In today’s society, we’re constantly bombarded with unrealistic ideals of perfection.
Our minds are saturated, especially on social media, where everyone appears to live perfect lives. Every girl looks like a goddess, and guys seem to drive luxury sports cars and with six-pack abs showing.
It’s a tough comparison game.
As someone who’s battled weight problems for most of my life, I get the pressure to measure up to these societal standards, and honestly, they’re pretty crazy.
However, most importantly, I’ve come to realize that chasing what others would consider perfection, will always lead to frustration.
Getting in shape.
When it comes to managing my weight, I can assure I’ve pretty much tried every diet out there.
From strict protein-only plans that gave me stomach troubles to the popular keto diet, which works well for many but clashed with my love for bread.
Intermittent fasting, to more balanced eating approaches, and even went vegetarian for two years, which is quite a change for a guy who used to frequent Brazilian steakhouses 4 times per month.
It opened my eyes to how poorly most of us eat.
But I can honestly say I’ve tried them all, even appealing to extreme measures like starving myself.
I mean, if prisoners of war can lose weight, why can’t I? (Needless to say this is not very healthy right?)
After trying all these diets and finding none of them provided lasting results, I realized I had to be doing something wrong.
Sure, many of them helped me burn some kilos initially and every time I would step on the scale, I’d see a lower number.
But, as many can relate, the real issue came when I lost control.
Not having a strong mindset and a real reason “why”, whenever external factors like academic stress or personal problems arose, affecting my mental and emotional well-being, all my progress would be lost.
I’d slip back into unhealthy habits and regain the weight.
It’s what they call the accordion effect, you know what I mean, right?
Shifting Minds
After a while, I’ve come to realize the biggest mistake I made about health (and actually is what most people do also)
is focusing solely on weight loss.
When weight loss becomes the end goal, it often turns into a short-term solution rather than a lasting lifestyle change.
Many weight loss journeys are motivated by external factors like wanting to see a smaller number on the scale, fitting into a specific outfit, or impressing others.
But let’s be honest, these motivations are weak and often fail to sustain healthy habits in the long run.
Nowadays, when people ask me about my journey and I tell them that the actual “weight loss” is the least significant aspect of it, they often react cynically.
They often respond with something like, “Come on, stop pretending like it doesn’t matter now that you’ve achieved it.”
And Yes, I wish it were that simple, but for someone like me, who has battled weight issues for most of my life and managed to shed over 80 kilos and get in shape, yes, it’s a significant accomplishment.
(Even though I’m not yet at the body I aspire to, I’m getting closer.)
The reality is that dropping that much weight, both physically and mentally is incredible. I won’t sugarcoat or be hypocritical about it.
F*ck yeah, it’s liberating and fun, and I’m the only one who knows how much effort was involved.
Now, I can see my own d*ck without having to lean forward, walk into any clothing store knowing something will fit, and not stress about those flimsy plastic chairs feet slipping and breaking when I sit at a bar table with friends
(even though I still do, some triggers are hard to deal)
Of course many things have changed, and I can’t deny the satisfaction it brings to my ego.
I’m only human, after all.
It’s immensely satisfying when people who knew me before see the new version of myself and go;
“OMG, you look amazing! Did you have surgery? No? Wow! Then please, share the secret with me. I want that magic formula!”
I must admit, I feel like I’ve gone from nothing to a desire creator, I absolutely love it.
The joy I feel when I tell them it was achieved without surgery is next level. The way their eyes light up, it’s as if I’ve become a god in their eyes. I can sense their respect for me going to new heights.
But this “leveling up” in their vision taught me one very important thing,
The admiration I receive in those five minutes happens because most people have a completely misguided mindset about losing weight and getting in shape.
They see it in a fundamentally wrong way.
And yeah well I get it, even me in the past also had the idea of:
“I am fat, I need to lose weight and get a lower number on the scale, and then my life will be better”
Maybe because the media tells us all the time how we should look, maybe because our friends and parents joke about us being fat, or even because we’re not satisfied with ourselves,
Whatever may be the reason, you want only to lose weight, and that’s it.
I get it, I was there once.
But now that I’ve passed through this process, I’ve come to realize one very important thing:
“The biggest mistake you can make when related to your health and body, Is wanting only to lose weight”
Who the heck wants to lose?
When your focus is on losing weight, that becomes the big elephant in the room, the obstacle you’re determined to overcome.
Yet, most people don’t even have their own personal reasons for wanting to kill that elephant.
They fill their minds with a million external motivations: fitting into a dress, looking amazing in photos for a wedding or trip, because someone made a comment about their weight, or wanting to improve their dating/sex life,
Or In more serious cases, health issues may be a concern.
Sure, these motivations might lead to some results and might even bring some benefits, but there’s one glaring problem: they’re all external factors.
Those reasons are all weak pillars to sustain something so important like your own health, most of them are not even your own idea.
Plus, who the heck wants to lose?
“I Want to Lose”
Take a moment to reflect on that sentence, hear it, repeat it to yourself.
Does it sound good? For me, it resonates with a weak, loser’s mentality. It’s not going to get you anywhere. The truth is, losing weight shouldn’t be your goal, not by a long shot. At best, it’s just a path you need to take to reach your true goal.
Let’s be real here:
What’s even the point of losing weight?
Living in this accordion effect forever and your mortal enemy called scale coming back to haunt you every time you get a different number of what you want to see on its screen?
Get real bro, there are ultra healthy people with 120 kilos, and there are ultra healthy people with 60 kilos, the weight is irrelevant.
Believe it or not, achieving the body you want, getting in shape, and even losing weight, has nothing to do with what number you see on a scale,
That number is the worst indicator ever.
In my past job, I’ve met models working for big brands, that smoked 2 packs of cigs a day, while surviving on food delivery and local junk food,
In the pictures you would want to marry them and believe they were perfect angels, off the shoot, you don’t even want to talk to them since their breath smells like an ashtray from the other side of the room.
Yeah, they do look like angels, and make a shit ton of money, But are they healthy?…well, that’s for another talk.
It’s not about the body or weight, it’s about the mindset.
Triggering I want to build.
Shifting your mindset and your reasons from “I want to lose weight” to “I want to build a healthier lifestyle” will profoundly impact your behavior.
Instead of viewing exercise, dieting, and resisting that piece of chocolate as desperate attempts to shed pounds, you’ll begin to see every decision you make throughout your day as steps toward creating the lifestyle you genuinely want to.
In my Newsletter “Morning Run”, where I talk about habits, tips and mindsets for improving in sports, health, and life in general, we deal a lot with this, not quick fixes, but long lasting results.
My old friend, Muay Thai and Boxing master once told me :
“The body of a fighter starts to change from the inside, the lines and muscles, are the last thing you will see, the top cherry, all the important changes, they happen in the inside first, if you’re hard as a diamond inside, the outside shines in every direction”
Unfortunately, I’ve come to understand this way later than I should.
But, your mind needs to change before everything else does, Otherwise, nothing will ever work.
When you begin training your mind to work in this way, you won’t be hitting the gym because someone called you fat or because you feel the need to lose weight anymore.
Instead, you’ll be going to the gym because you want to build a body and lifestyle that you’re proud of, a body that fits into the clothes you future self want to wear and that you love to see in the mirror every day, not just for photos.
You won’t go for a walk or a run because you need to lose weight.
You’ll do it because you want to build the habit of running, to strengthen your legs, or to improve your cardiovascular health.
It doesn’t matter what you’re striving to build, but trust me,
Nobody wants to lose.
By understanding all your daily habits and single second decisions will either get you closer to your goal or further away from it,
You will gain conscience to assume and deal with the fact that if You stay on the couch lying in comfort and eat your lovely chocolate bar every day, It won’t make you gain or lose anything.
It will just take you further away from what you want to achieve.
Can you see the difference between that mentality and:
“I won’t eat this chocolate I love so much, because I need to lose weight” ?
The sentence above looks like what a 5-year-old kid said while trying to make her mom not hide the chocolate on the top shelf,
Which 5-year-old has self-control?
Not for weight.
I focused here about weight, because for me the body weight was the trigger which allowed me to reach this kind of mindset and improve various areas of my life,
But as you can understand by now, this mindset change applies to anything,
It’s never about what you want to gain or lose,
It’s about building the habits and daily routine which will allow you to reach the goal you want, whatever may be this goal.
The thing is most of us already know what we need to do to reach our objectives, but we procrastinate and keep finding excuses while lying to ourselves to stay in comfort.
If you want to achieve your health and life objectives, the first thing you need to change in yourself is your mindset.
I can’t do it for you, your loved ones can’t do it for you, not even god can make it for you,
only yourself.
Stop with the idea of losing and start with the idea of building, you’ll see how much will change.
The key to achieving lasting health and fitness goals lies in shifting your mindset from “losing” to “building”.
It’s about cultivating habits and creating routines that align with your long-term objectives, instead of chasing temporary fixes.
And Just one more very important thing before I go:
The only difference between who you are right now and who you want to be, Is how you choose to spend each precious second of your day, nothing else.
All of the decisions you make during your day, can either take you closer to your objectives, or further away from it,
but they are your own damm choice.
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Yo, thanks if you read up to here, hope you takes something good out of it.
I’m Gaspar and write about healthy lifestyle, fitness, and marketing.
And I can help you become Your fittest version and sell more.
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(If you don’t do it now, there is a pretty big chance we’ll never see each other again, and that’s sad).
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Have a Nice Day!
–DGaspar.
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