HUMOR | SHORT & WEIRD | MICROFICTION | 284-WORDS
The Two Little Pigs Sell Out Their Sibling to the Big Bad Wolf
At least the money was good
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Dear reader,
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Thank you kindly 🙏🏽 “Look at all those Benjamin Franklins, Fiddler! We can sit on them without needing to break our backs working! Visit Pigseyland, chill out in Bali, or do whatever the fuck we want!”
“We had to sell out Practical to the Big Bad Wolf, though. By now Big Fat Wolf it seems. I feel guilty, Fifer. They were a pain in the ass but they were still our sibling.”
“We thank Practical for their sacrifice. God bless their obnoxious soul. We need to visit their grave every five years. However, look on the bright side. Do you hear that? Pure silence.
No more sanctimonious judgments, no calls to be responsible. We know we are self-serving pricks, we don’t need Practical to remind us!”
“So you can sleep easy at night, Fifer?”
“Like a nestling swallow.”
“Will the Wolf leave us alone now? What if he gets hungry again?”
“By then we’ll be long gone, Fid. We can ditch our crappy home.”
“Where did the Wolf find all that money, Fifer?”
“No idea. What matters is…”
The Big Bad Bear suddenly showed up dragging a barely alive Wolf from the neck like a teddy bear.
“Are you the fuckers who took my money?” the Bear growled.
Fifer and Fiddler were petrified.
“The… the Wolf gave it to us!” Fifer said, whimpering.
“He stole it, but you took it! Anyway, I’m starving. I don’t like wolf meat so you two will do.”
The little pigs ditched the money and ran, in vain. The Bear reached them and devoured both.
At the pig-afterlife the first pig they met was Practical.
“I see you screwed up my betrayal, too. Congrats!”
Practical haunted Fifer and Fiddler for all eternity.
A short & weird take on Alice by May More 💜 Tales:
And another weird tale by yours truly, with Smillew Rahcuef as the MC:
