The Twelve Days of 40: Part 12/13

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ous lawyer position at a non-profit organization in the city’s Koreatown neighborhood. She had also grown up in the area and wanted to live closer to her family.Kay and I scheduled our wedding for October of 2020. Everything was set. We picked the church and reception venue. We selected our maids of honor, bridesmaids, best man, groomsmen, and wedding godparents. We even hired a photographer for the big day. We were excited, nervous, and — most importantly — happy. With all of our meticulous planning, what could possibly go wrong?The worldwide COVID-19 pandemic.After months of frustration, uncertainty, and tears, Kay and I decided to postpone our church wedding and reception. It was the only reasonable choice we could make. Although we wanted to marry, the safety of our loved ones was our main concern.Despite the postponement, Kay and I decided to wed at a nearby courthouse. The 15-minute ceremony took place in September of 2020. Due to statewide COVID-19 health restrictions, only two witnesses (Kay’s parents, Lucky and Albert) were allowed to attend but had to stand six feet apart from us.After the ceremony, Kay and I held a gathering at our house with only her sisters (Quetzali and Mari), our goddaughter (Moon), Lucky, and

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Albert in attendance. My parents, Cal and Bee, could not attend, but watched parts of the celebration via video chat. We ate lunch, took photos and toasted with champagne, and concluded the evening with cake and coffee.Although the day did not happen as planned, it was still the happiest day of our lives. Kay and I, the following year, finally had our church wedding and reception with nearly 200 loved ones in attendance. COVID-19 numbers had dropped by that point, so we felt more comfortable celebrating in-person.I smile when I think about our courthouse wedding ceremony four years ago because it had taught me two important lessons:First, it was a reminder that Kay and I did not need superficiality to be happy with one another. Eye-catching floral arrangements, beautiful clothing, and delicious food were ultimately nothing more than items. But it was the promises we made and love we had for each other that day that would last a lifetime.Second, the best things in life often happen unexpectedly. We, as humans, often make our lives overly complicated with impatience, stubbornness, and a need for control. Letting go of the proverbial reins, accepting life as it comes, and being patient can often bring us the most happiness.</article></body>

The Twelve Days of 40: Part 12/13

Photo by Alvin Mahmudov on Unsplash

You have likely heard the song “The 12 Days of Christmas” at some point in your life. “On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…” Blah, blah, blah. Et cetera. So on and so forth.

To celebrate my 40th birthday scheduled to take place less than a year from now, I would like to look back at the 12 most unforgettable days of my life (plus one honorable mention). They have all made me the person I am today: an imperfect, yet perfectly happy husband, father, son, brother, and human being.

It would only make sense to start at the bottom of the list and work our way to the top. So, without further ado…

No. 2: Kay’s and my (first) wedding in 2020.

The day was a lesson in patience.

Kay, my then-fiancée, and I relocated from the San Francisco Bay Area to Los Angeles in 2019. We moved because she had accepted a prestigious lawyer position at a non-profit organization in the city’s Koreatown neighborhood. She had also grown up in the area and wanted to live closer to her family.

Kay and I scheduled our wedding for October of 2020. Everything was set. We picked the church and reception venue. We selected our maids of honor, bridesmaids, best man, groomsmen, and wedding godparents. We even hired a photographer for the big day. We were excited, nervous, and — most importantly — happy. With all of our meticulous planning, what could possibly go wrong?

The worldwide COVID-19 pandemic.

After months of frustration, uncertainty, and tears, Kay and I decided to postpone our church wedding and reception. It was the only reasonable choice we could make. Although we wanted to marry, the safety of our loved ones was our main concern.

Despite the postponement, Kay and I decided to wed at a nearby courthouse. The 15-minute ceremony took place in September of 2020. Due to statewide COVID-19 health restrictions, only two witnesses (Kay’s parents, Lucky and Albert) were allowed to attend but had to stand six feet apart from us.

After the ceremony, Kay and I held a gathering at our house with only her sisters (Quetzali and Mari), our goddaughter (Moon), Lucky, and Albert in attendance. My parents, Cal and Bee, could not attend, but watched parts of the celebration via video chat. We ate lunch, took photos and toasted with champagne, and concluded the evening with cake and coffee.

Although the day did not happen as planned, it was still the happiest day of our lives. Kay and I, the following year, finally had our church wedding and reception with nearly 200 loved ones in attendance. COVID-19 numbers had dropped by that point, so we felt more comfortable celebrating in-person.

I smile when I think about our courthouse wedding ceremony four years ago because it had taught me two important lessons:

First, it was a reminder that Kay and I did not need superficiality to be happy with one another. Eye-catching floral arrangements, beautiful clothing, and delicious food were ultimately nothing more than items. But it was the promises we made and love we had for each other that day that would last a lifetime.

Second, the best things in life often happen unexpectedly. We, as humans, often make our lives overly complicated with impatience, stubbornness, and a need for control. Letting go of the proverbial reins, accepting life as it comes, and being patient can often bring us the most happiness.