The transformative power of self-compassion
we owe ourselves some kindness!
We have all suffered setbacks at different points in our lives. We have all been unkind to ourselves at those times and well beyond.
Yet, here we are! As we should be.
Setbacks do not scathe us forever. When we think we failed, we fret, we avoid it, we question ourselves.
However, the simple truth is that no great success was ever achieved without a few setbacks along the way.
The ones who recover quicker from setbacks are the ones who practise greater self-compassion.
Self-compassion is not a sign of weakness; nor is it a selfish endeavour. We need to recognise that it is a fundamental aspect of our emotional well-being and personal growth.
Self-compassion helps us recognise that failures are not only inevitable but can also be our best teachers, something to be explored rather than avoided.
There are numerous instances in history, from all disciplines of lives, of people who have failed and failed, before their names were etched in the echelons of society.
Dr. Kristin Neff, a pioneer in the study of self-compassion says that “it is simply the process of turning compassion inward”.
Self-compassion is about how we offer the same benefit of kindness and care to ourselves as we would close friends or family when faced with personal setbacks or suffering.
Cultivating the power to be self-compassionate is important for us to discover new ways to achieve self-confidence, and contentment and reach our highest potential.
Practising self-compassion essentially consists of being cognisant of three aspects:
- being gentle and understanding towards ourselves rather than our default position of being harshly critical;
- recognising that setbacks and imperfections are experiences shared by all of us;
- being aware of our thoughts and emotions, without suppressing or exaggerating them.
Now, here’s the kicker -
Practising self-compassion is not only beneficial to ourselves but also to those around us and eventually, the power radiates well beyond ourselves.
Being intentionally self-compassionate is often associated with reduced symptoms of anxiety and stress, aiding enhanced emotional resilience and helping us foster and maintain healthier relationships, ultimately achieving greater well-being and overall life satisfaction.
To paraphrase Louise Hay’s words — “We’ve been criticising ourselves for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of ourselves and see what happens.”
Alas, what have we to lose?
