The Tired and Tested Method to Beat Resistance
The power of accountability and the fear of judgement

I lost my job in July and now I don’t want to do shit.
I’m serious.
I get up every day with lofty dreams about creative endeavours and passive income streams and then I sit down and scroll through social media for hours.
It never used to be like this, previous to unemployment, I was super busy.
I had a responsible corporate job, but found time to write articles during toilet breaks, I recorded vlogs at lunchtime, I drove to London to perform stand up comedy in the evenings and when I didn’t do that I visited the gym instead. This was all done with a 3-year-old son, a wife and 3 step-children.
Oh, and a dog to walk.
I was the poster boy for busyness. Now, I get stressed just picking up my son from pre-school as it interrupts my day for 30 minutes.
Doing nothing compounds.
Entropy has got me. It’s a dangerous trap I’ve fallen into and it’s all because there’s a lack of accountability in my life.
The power of not wanting to look like a fool
There’s a phrase in self-improvement circles which is:
“What would you do if you knew you could not fail?”
I don’t like this phrase. It’s bullshit.
For a start, it comes from a televangelist called Robert H Sculler, so I’m sure he said it before asking for another $1,000 donation or whatever, but mostly, the problem is humans aren’t worried about failing, they’re worried about judgement.
Who cares if you fail and no one knows?
When we practice anything, we’re failing hundreds of times over, when we compete in sport, we embrace failure, when we get on a skateboard drunk with friends, we court failure for a laugh.
People aren’t afraid to fail, only judged. The quote should really read:
“What would you do if you knew you wouldn’t be judged?” — Jamie Jackson
Yep, I just attributed a quote to myself. Get over it.
The trouble is, we all think we’re free spirits who don’t live in the matrix of other peoples opinions (maaan), but reality tells a different story.
Think you don’t dance to the best of other people’s opinion? Ask yourself why do you get haircuts, wear makeup, or buy nice clothes if you don’t care about other people’s opinions? Do you sit at home in a fancy outfit wearing a nice cologne to watch Netflix alone on a Tuesday night?
Judgement is the driving force behind most of our decisions.
We don’t want to be seen as a loser, a disappointment, an embarrassment. I’m sure there are many evolutionary reasons for this, but all we need to know right now is fear of judgement is real and it dictates your life.
This is why accountability works.
Accountability as a kicker of backsides
My friend goes to British Military Fitness. It sounds impressive, but it’s just a park work-out with personal trainers. Still, the BMF principle is you train with a partner. They carry you (sometimes literally), then you carry them, that sort of thing.
Why? Because the military realised long ago people work harder if they’re going to let someone else down rather than themselves.
It’s easy for me to sit on social media rather than writing or editing my own videos because I’m only answerable to me, but the moment a freelance client sends me a video I work on it and get it out to them in within the 48-hour deadline.
That’s accountability kicking my backside.
Think about the amount of all-nighters you’ve pulled before an essay was due —that’s accountability kicking your backside.
“Accountability is the glue that ties commitment to the result.” — Bob Proctor
In 2018, I did a year of Tony Robbins performance coaching and I got more done in 12 months than I probably achieved in the ten years prior.
This isn’t an advert for coaching, I have no affiliation with them, but the point is my progress was supersonic because I had to get on the phone with my coach every week to explain why I had or hadn’t done something.
I once sat outside an open-mic comedy night sick with nerves but went in and performed anyway because I didn’t want to explain to my coach I’d chickened out.
Accountability works.
Here’s an embarrassing admission
Since redundancy, I’ve bought a course on flipping, a course on how to go viral on Twitter and a very expensive Les Brown speaking course… all of which I didn’t do.
That’s right, I bought three courses and I didn’t do any of them.
Why? There was no accountability if I didn’t do them. So invariably, I didn’t.
Lack of accountability knocks us off course more than any other factor.
Even financial loss isn’t enough of a motivator —as I’ve shown.
If you don’t have someone holding you accountable 90% of the time you will not do the necessary work.
Self-discipline will only carry you so far, don’t delude yourself. Your environmental pressures will beat your goals every time.
As James Clear puts it: “Systems over goals”.
Accountability is the most powerful of all systems.
Human behaviour is based on incentives.
If you have people counting on you, your incentive will be to not let them down, or at least not to appear useless.
Right now, I’m cruising on redundancy money, so I have no urgency, no accountability and therefore resistance is winning.
Get accountable to others
You must outsource your willpower through accountability if you want to accelerate out of the quagmire you’re currently stuck in.
I would recommend getting a coach if you can afford one, but if that’s not a viable solution right now, I would not rely on a friend or family member as a cheap alternative.
If you can comfortably say, “Nah, I didn’t do it” to someone’s face, that someone shouldn’t be holding you accountable.
So, the alternative is to hold yourself accountable by removing all safety nets, meaning you have to complete projects and earn money. Failure is not an option.
Want an easier way? There isn’t one.
Those aforementioned all-nighters to meet a deadline only come from failure not being an option. I once stayed up for 30-hours straight writing my university dissertation because it was that or fail my degree at the final hurdle.
I fell asleep at my keyboard more than once but I did what I had to do because there was no safety net. Accountability dragged me kicking and screaming over the finish line.
It wasn’t pleasant, but it worked. Besides, the only reason why I hadn’t started writing the dissertation sooner is no one had held me accountable and checked up on my progress.
The greatest pressure creates diamonds, less pressure creates coal and no pressure creates mud.
Don’t be muddy, rather be sympathetic to how your mind works and start making yourself accountable. Progress only comes with the pressure of accountability. It’s your ticket to becoming who you know you can be.
