Life Lessons
The Three Things I Am Leaving in 2021
As we come to the end of another year, I thought I would put together this list of things I hope to leave behind. We often pick up habits and take actions that are not the best. Although they feel good for a short time, we know they will lead to our doom.
Thankfully, I have not picked up many bad habits this year. Part of the reason for this is the amount of time I spent home thanks to the pandemic. However, there are three things I have found I think I can leave behind.
Setting new years resolutions is always a fun activity, but they are often always written as goals. For example:
“I will lose X amount of weight in X amount of time.”
Although it is something to strive for, it can be hard to keep up because it seems so far away. So, this year, I have thought about things I would rather not take into 2022. It is always easier to not do something than to start doing something.
So, hopefully, my list inspires you to think of some of the things you are thinking of leaving in 2021.
#1 Impatience
Unfortunately, I have grown more impatient in 2021. During the pandemic, I spent a lot of time online shopping, even for my groceries. Everything was a click or phone call away, and I enjoyed it.
However, as things started up again, I realised I was less patient. I started to hate taking walks to the shop and tried to rush cooking every evening. Despite having more than enough time to get things done, I was still trying to speed through them.
My impatience continued to grow until I felt my anxiety levels increasing. With more impatience came my worry that the future would not work out. I was always thinking about the next thing to do and was constantly rushing through life.
Impatience did nothing for me but decrease the quality of my present moment. I could not enjoy every phone call, meal, or sentence I would write. Instead, life became a race, and I was running it as though I wanted it to end.
In 2022, impatience is something I will certainly be leaving behind. Life is already short enough as it is, so why make it shorter. Yes, we should value our time and not let others abuse it. However, we should also make sure that the time we have is well spent in the present.
#2 Saying Yes to Everything
At the beginning of 2021, I was receiving a lot of requests. People wanted me to help with all kinds of things, and I was more than happy to do so. I am someone who enjoys helping those who are helping themselves and others. So, I find it hard to say no, especially for a good cause.
However, towards the middle of the year, I found I did not have enough time for myself. Unfortunately, the projects I wanted to get done were held up.
Our urge to say yes to others is ingrained in us from a young age. We enjoy being part of things that are important to us, but we also like the validation of others. Although much of the self-care advice out there tells us not to care what others think, deep down, we always will.
We also hate rejecting others because we hate rejection. So, it can be hard to say the word no, but sometimes it is necessary. And it does not always mean you are being selfish.
I have learned that saying no leads to more fulfillment in my own life. When I take time out to write or work on a project, I feel like I am adding more to society.
Therefore, in 2022, I will start saying no to most things and yes to a few. I encourage you to do this too. It will give you way more time to focus on the things that really matter to you.
#3 Dead Friendships
We all have some “friends” that we still talk to now and then. We always tell them we should catch up sometime and never do. We may have been good friends in the past, but now, the friendship is quite dead.
We also have friends that do not add much to our lives. We may speak to them often, but it is just for comfort. We are not growing together, and deep down, we do not care much about them.
It is hard to part ways with these “friends” because there is no malice. They are often generally good people we have no problems with. However, life is short, and nurturing dead flowers is pointless.
In 2021, people became part of my regular life due to the lockdowns. People were bored and were looking for company and good conversation. Even I reached out to people I had not spoken to in a long time just to have some company. However, as I come towards the end of 2021, I have started to reduce the number of people I converse with regularly.
Before the pandemic, life was simple, and I only had a few people I would reach out to. Now, I am overburdening myself by keeping conversations going with people that do not add much.
Therefore, dead friendships will be left dead in 2021. That is not to say I wish bad on those individuals, but it does mean I understand who my true friends are. And if you seek to make next year any better than this year, there is no better way than to keep those who matter most close to you.