The Street Puppeteer and Old Woman Who Will Make You Smile

How unconventional friendships can improve your life

What happens when an aging widow and a street puppeteer meet in Washington Square Park, New York City?

Sometimes the elderly are wary of scruffy-looking, younger men. And sometimes younger men are dismissive of elderly people.

But that’s not what happened between Doris Diether and Ricky Syers.

Doris was immediately charmed by Ricky’s free-spirited personality and colorful marionettes. And she loved puppets.

Ricky was enamored by the fact that Doris was nice to him. During subsequent meetings in the park, Doris shared with Ricky some past articles she published (she was a former journalist). Ricky later surprised Doris with a marionette he made of her.

And so a beautiful friendship was born.

A heart full of grace

Doris Diether was born in 1929 in Flushing, Queens, where she grew up and graduated from high school.

In 1959 she married her husband, Jack Diether, who was a music critic. The two lived in a rent-controlled apartment in Greenwich Village.

Jack died in 1987, and Doris remained for the rest of her life in the apartment.

In addition to her journalism, Doris became an activist for community engagement. She championed events like Shakespeare in the parks and fought zoning proposals that threatened to limit cultural events.

“Everybody can be great…because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.” — Martin Luther King Jr.

In 1962 Doris became president of the group “Save the Village.” She was later named to a lower Manhattan community board to review zoning changes.

She served on that board for over 50 years and became a local zoning expert.

An artist trying to be all those other things

Ricky Syers had a background in manual labor, which he loathed. His real passion was playing music in the parks and performing in public with his handmade marionettes.

Ricky and Doris were very different individuals, but sometimes the best connections happen between people of disparate backgrounds.

Ricky and Doris appear in a splendid video titled “Ricky and Doris: An Unconventional Friendship in New York City. With Puppets!” The video was filmed by David Friedman and David Usui for AARP studios.

In the film, Ricky states:

“I hated work more than anybody. I wanted to be out so bad. I would rather die on the street as a street performer than try to create some sort of life that’s going to satisfy somebody else.”

Ricky adds:

“All these years I haven’t been a laborer trying to be an artist or a, uh, steelworker trying to be an artist, you know. I was an artist trying to be all those other things.”

In the same video, Doris shared:

“I have no sense of age somehow, which everybody gets a kick out of. I can’t tell whether they’re 25 or 45. When I go to the park, any number of people from different groups and ages and so forth come over and greet me. If the person is interesting, that’s what I relate to. Not whether they are black or white or 60 or 15.”

Take a moment to enjoy the video below.

In the film, we get a peek at Doris’s book-filled apartment and Ricky’s cluttered workshop. Both shared an affinity for surrounding themselves with the things they love.

More importantly, this unlikely pair formed a true friendship, and sometimes even performed together with Ricky’s marionettes in the park. A few of Doris’s friends told Ricky that the puppets were making Doris younger.

“Did I do that?” Ricky says in the video, clearly proud of how his puppets uplifted Doris.

I would rather walk with a friend in the dark

This is the power of unconventional friendships. Sometimes the wisdom of the old, paired with the optimism of the young, can forge a strong bond. They complement one another.

“I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.” — Helen Keller

Other times, people simply yearn for companionship. Loneliness motivates them to connect with others. And the more unconventional the pairing, the more unique the potential benefits.

Doris probably never envisioned herself performing in the park with marionettes. But people loved it, which made her feel good, and maybe a bit younger, too.

This in turn left a deep impression on Ricky. He saw firsthand how his marionettes not only brought joy to others but maybe breathed a bit of new life into an aging widow.

A living golden treasure

When I was a young man at University, my family encouraged me to reach out to an elderly woman who lived in the area.

The woman, whose name was Mrs. Young, was related to a dear friend of my parents. Mrs. Young had lost her husband and lived alone.

I phoned Mrs. Young and suggested we get together.

She enthusiastically agreed and invited me and my roommate to her townhouse. When we arrived, Mrs. Young invited us in. She provided a lovely spread of crackers, cheeses, snacks, and drinks.

We spent several hours visiting with Mrs. Young, who was full of wisdom, stories, and interest in our studies. It was an enjoyable visit.

“An elderly person at home [is like] a living golden treasure.”— Chinese saying

Mrs. Young and I had a few more get-togethers, and we corresponded for two years after that. She used to send me typewritten letters full of advice and encouragement.

I was enriched by my interactions with Mrs. Young, and regret that I didn’t get to visit her one last time before she passed away.

The siblings God never gave us

In the delightful movie The Intern, Robert De Niro plays Ben Whittaker, a 70-year-old widower who becomes a senior intern at an online fashion website.

Whittaker is an old-school gent who comes to work in suits, carrying his classic business attache case. He ends up forming an unconventional friendship with the company’s workaholic CEO and founder, Jules Ostin (played by Anne Hathaway).

“Friends are the siblings God never gave us.” — Mencius

Whittaker’s business experience, maturity, and wisdom prove invaluable to Ostin as she navigates difficult business decisions, and turbulence in her marriage.

In return, the internship gave Whittaker a new purpose in life. A chance to share his knowledge and advice with younger coworkers, and make some new friends.

The movie, like Ricky and Doris’s friendship, and my interactions with Mrs. Young, celebrates the power of an unconventional friendship. Sometimes the friend we most need in life bears little resemblance to ourselves.

Keep this in mind.

Maybe you’re older, maybe you’re younger. Perhaps your background is vastly different than someone else’s. Don’t let these things interfere with establishing new friendships.

It’s our differences, unique backgrounds, experiences, and varied perspectives that can complement another person’s life. The key is to set aside our preconceived notions, entrenched political dogmas, and unjustified biases.

That old man on the park bench may have wisdom beyond your years. That young lady with purple hair and tattoos just might have some great business advice.

Don’t judge a book by its cover.

Be open to the benefits of an unconventional friendship. It could change your life, and you just might change their life.

Before you go

I’m John P. Weiss. I draw, take pictures, and write elegant essays about life. Check out my Saturday Letters here.