The Shy Child Who Saw Ghosts

I Thought Everyone Saw Spirits 🧿

I wasn’t born a medium. But I always saw spirits. The white figures in my peripheral were as normal to me as seeing the birds in the sky. I could smell the scent of tar from my grandpa I never met— He had worked in a tire factory for most of his life. But how to communicate with them I wouldn’t learn until I was in my mid to late twenties.

When I was a baby in my walker, my parents would tell me that they would see me give beaming smiles to people who weren’t there. My parents found it odd but shrugged it off. Like most people, I can’t recall anything from around the age of two or earlier.

But my childhood amnesia stops between the ages of three and four. Around this age, I finally got to see a spirit directly for the first time in my life. It was nightfall and I left my grandparent’s house.

I was bundled up and tagging along with my mother walking to the car. She drove my deceased grandpa’s grey Ford truck back then. I stopped in my tracks as soon as I saw what was across the street. The figures were solid like I was familiar with. A spectral woman was playing with an equally spectral child. They radiated a golden glow. The golden color was so vibrant I have yet to see the exact same shade again.

It contrasted their background. The neighbor’s house was a pale fading green, it was unclean and everything wooden there retained a crack or chip. They had a reputation for thievery and rudeness. But why they appeared across the street at this house I have yet to know.

Looking at them gave me a strong sense of love and peace. Behind them was a bold golden glowing star. I felt like I could have stayed in that moment forever. But after a matter of seconds, my mother called for me. I knew I had to go. The feeling of absolute serenity left the very moment I looked away.

For weeks after this event, I would search the sky hoping to find the star I saw. I mentioned this star to my mother and she shrugged it off as childhood imagination. When I became a teenager I told myself it was a dream. I wasn’t ready to embrace the metaphysical. Despite this, I never stopped seeing spirits in my peripheral vision.

In 2019 I finally addressed this occurrence to a medium at a psychic fair. She mentioned the fae at my grandparent’s house without me mentioning them to her. She then said she thought the golden spirits that came to me that night were my family. The session had to end shortly after that message and she told me she would get back to me. I gave her my phone number and never heard back.

I don’t think it was the time for me to hear I was a Starseed. I found that out months later. I still have yet to learn most of the details.

I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I was being watched. When I was small I assumed everyone saw spirits, I also assumed they too experienced this feeling regularly.

I recall mentioning the spirits I saw to a girl in my elementary school. I was excited to share my experiences with someone my age. It was during library time when I told her. I recall her brows furrowing into an angry wrinkle. She didn't hesitate to tell me my experiences were ludicrous. From that time till my teenage years, I kept quiet about spirits.

Have you ever felt like you were being watched by something sinister? When this feeling started to become a regular occurrence in my life I can’t tell you. It’s an awful skin-crawling feeling that I wish on no one. I’ve experienced this feeling since I was a small child. At night when I tried to sleep this feeling often came back. It felt like unavoidable terror.

I often went to bed with my mom. I didn’t try sleeping on my own till I was a teenager. Even then I didn’t sleep alone more often than not. I became fearful of sleeping with my back not facing some form of security, such as a wall or my mother.

I now know I was being stalked by an evil spirit. How he found out about me I don’t know. There were many opportunities where something negative could have detected me. My father brought many unusual items and antiques into the house. Back when he struggled with alcohol he even took me to bars as a small child. One of those items ended up being a clear quartz point necklace that moved on its own. My parents never believed me when I said it did. There were too many possible situations for me to pinpoint where this thing came from.

I thought my house was haunted for many years. I spent many nights curling up in the bed in fear of the footsteps I heard coming from the kitchen. No one heard them but me. I knew everyone was asleep in my house.

By the fireplace in my home, there is a built-in cabinet with two doors. One opens to the attached garage, the other opens to the living room. It has double locks and is surrounded by thick cement.

I would sometimes hear knocking coming from that cabinet. In middle school, one of my friends decided to open it with me. She too heard the knocking. It was empty. No doors or windows were open. The glass doors to the fireplace were shut. After we closed the cabinet door the knocking ceased.

I knew something was looming. As an adult, I finally had to address it. That was a whirlwind experience that I still have aftershocks of. It’s an experience that pains me to relive. And yet even writing about it even in the slightest amount helps bring me healing.

I’m so grateful that you took the time to read my article. If you would like to see more of my work, you can go to my Linktree.