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1959

Abstract

re hard to come by. Sex education is really not great in Asia. It’s hard to tell what kind of judgemental reactions people (including medical staff as I have personally experienced) will have. Contraception pills or jabs are also not free, unlike in the UK. Lastly, given the history of oriental medicine, doing something so invasive to a woman’s body is simply frowned upon.All these reasons are logical, so if a man from other cultures is dating an Asian woman, it’s important to use condoms and respect their choices of contraception.<h2 id="25a7">It shouldn’t be a point of conflict</h2>It’s true that men generally don’t like to use condoms. A bare dick does feel better, perhaps even for the women. However, under no circumstances should pleasure take over responsibilities.Women are the ones who bear the child in case of an accidental pregnancy. They will be the ones who feel insecure, pain, and at risk. It’s not like the men won’t, and it’s not like all men will just escape when things like that happen, but it’s physically possible for the man to run away from a woman with a baby in their womb.With all the ridiculous myths flying around about Asian women’s sexuality, it is a good time to take a reality check. Sex is intrinsic to society’s development, culture and norms, without sex, it’s literally impossible to populate enough people to create a society.So it’s not logical to just look at sex as a standalone thing. Especially when it comes to sex with people from another culture, knowing their cultural reality is extremely important.<h2 id="04e7">Having sex with an Asian woman (or any woman really)</h2>Whether it’s for a one-night stand or a proper relationship, I think it’s really worth knowing where do they stand in things (in fact, communication is needed when having sex with all women).Bring

Options

a condom in all cases and don’t have sex if neither of you has a condom. It is simply not ok. No one wants a night of fun that turns into pregnancy, STIs or any other issues.If your condom broke, be present and supportive on the trip to buy the morning-after pill. Don’t just go away. My worst experience is when the guy refused to pay for the pill, it’s not that I didn’t have the money for it, but it just made me feel absolutely horrible. As if the night before was a big mistake (it was). I was already vulnerable enough, but this man was adding more pressure and pain on me than ever.It was traumatising.Don’t be the person whom people will regret having sex with. Have some integrity, some sense of responsibility.Do not be cheeky and do a pull-out on women who aren’t on contraceptives. Women should definitely say no, this kind of man is bad news.Women have as much entitlement to great sex than men. Asian women have long been imagined to be submissive. In the crooked history, we are a double minority (and if the Asian woman is a lesbian, that’s technically triple). There’s no need to act like a victim, but extra care is needed to make Asian women feel respected and dignified.I am not talking about anything over the top here. Bring a condom, learn about their personal preference. There are Asian women who are very westernised, there are Asian women who have more traditional values unique to their cultures. Just like every person in this world.Rather than thinking it in terms of ‘white supremacy’, I refer to think of it as ‘ethnocentric’, to make judgements based on our own culture only. This is really not helpful if you embark on a relationship with people from another culture (Asian or not). Try to have an open mind and don’t assume what you’ve assumed is always right.</article></body>

The Shocking Truth of Women’s Contraception

People don’t use it the same way in Asia

Photo by Reproductive Health Supplies Coalition on Unsplash

The popular Hong Kong movie Love in a Puff (available on Netflix) has a short scene where the girlfriend complained about going to the clinic for contraception jabs every month.

She said, ‘It was all because you don’t want to use condoms, so I have to get jabbed. It hurts so much.’

I remember watching this movie before I had much experience with sex or romance (the movie came out in 2010). Watching it so many years later, I was able to compare the attitude on women’s contraception between the East and the West.

Are you an Asian woman living in the West? Are you dating an Asian woman? ‘White supremacy’ or not, it’s important not to push the West’s value to the East.

Investigate, learn and respect. Whatever the woman decides, it should be for her own good.

Condoms are always the first choice

I can only refer to the situation in the UK and Hong Kong. First, there aren’t that many sexual health clinics in Hong Kong (it’s usually called family planning clinics). People don’t really go to these places for contraceptive or STI checks, people go there for pregnancy-related support.

It’s uncommon for women to take contraceptive pills in Hong Kong. Especially if you are not married.

The lack of culture means information and resources are hard to come by. Sex education is really not great in Asia. It’s hard to tell what kind of judgemental reactions people (including medical staff as I have personally experienced) will have. Contraception pills or jabs are also not free, unlike in the UK. Lastly, given the history of oriental medicine, doing something so invasive to a woman’s body is simply frowned upon.

All these reasons are logical, so if a man from other cultures is dating an Asian woman, it’s important to use condoms and respect their choices of contraception.

It shouldn’t be a point of conflict

It’s true that men generally don’t like to use condoms. A bare dick does feel better, perhaps even for the women. However, under no circumstances should pleasure take over responsibilities.

Women are the ones who bear the child in case of an accidental pregnancy. They will be the ones who feel insecure, pain, and at risk. It’s not like the men won’t, and it’s not like all men will just escape when things like that happen, but it’s physically possible for the man to run away from a woman with a baby in their womb.

With all the ridiculous myths flying around about Asian women’s sexuality, it is a good time to take a reality check. Sex is intrinsic to society’s development, culture and norms, without sex, it’s literally impossible to populate enough people to create a society.

So it’s not logical to just look at sex as a standalone thing. Especially when it comes to sex with people from another culture, knowing their cultural reality is extremely important.

Having sex with an Asian woman (or any woman really)

Whether it’s for a one-night stand or a proper relationship, I think it’s really worth knowing where do they stand in things (in fact, communication is needed when having sex with all women).

Bring a condom in all cases and don’t have sex if neither of you has a condom. It is simply not ok. No one wants a night of fun that turns into pregnancy, STIs or any other issues.

If your condom broke, be present and supportive on the trip to buy the morning-after pill. Don’t just go away. My worst experience is when the guy refused to pay for the pill, it’s not that I didn’t have the money for it, but it just made me feel absolutely horrible. As if the night before was a big mistake (it was). I was already vulnerable enough, but this man was adding more pressure and pain on me than ever.

It was traumatising.

Don’t be the person whom people will regret having sex with. Have some integrity, some sense of responsibility.

Do not be cheeky and do a pull-out on women who aren’t on contraceptives. Women should definitely say no, this kind of man is bad news.

Women have as much entitlement to great sex than men. Asian women have long been imagined to be submissive. In the crooked history, we are a double minority (and if the Asian woman is a lesbian, that’s technically triple). There’s no need to act like a victim, but extra care is needed to make Asian women feel respected and dignified.

I am not talking about anything over the top here. Bring a condom, learn about their personal preference. There are Asian women who are very westernised, there are Asian women who have more traditional values unique to their cultures. Just like every person in this world.

Rather than thinking it in terms of ‘white supremacy’, I refer to think of it as ‘ethnocentric’, to make judgements based on our own culture only. This is really not helpful if you embark on a relationship with people from another culture (Asian or not). Try to have an open mind and don’t assume what you’ve assumed is always right.