The Recipe For Lasting Love
Ten ingredients for a healthy, happy relationship
“A pinch of patience, a dash of kindness, a spoonful of laughter, and a heap of love.” ~ Author Unknown
It is easy to fall in love but much more difficult to navigate a long-term relationship. I have formulated the perfect recipe for a lasting, loving, healthy relationship, and I will share the ingredients and how to put them into inspired action to ignite your love life long-term.
Lasting Love Ingredient List
- Trust
- Respect
- Acceptance
- Personal Responsibility & Accountability
- Emotional Intelligence
- Compromise
- Intimacy
- Openness
- Shared values & beliefs
- Common goals & interests
Recipe for Success
Putting the ingredients into inspired action is not exactly straightforward. It takes pure intention, practice, and awareness.
Trust
As a life coach, I value the mentors in my life. I have a Coach who told me that I only need to trust myself. That resonated and stuck with me. No matter how often I am hurt by someone else, I only need to trust myself.
When something feels off, it probably is, and your intuition will warn you. It is up to you to have open, honest conversations. However, only ask questions you are ready to face the answers to. I say this from personal experience.
Trust is a funny thing.
Once it is broken, it is extremely difficult to repair. It will make you feel as if you are walking on eggshells, and it is the foundation of a relationship. So, do you want a home built of brick or eggshells?
Respect
Respect counts as partner to partner, but what happens when we are out of our partner’s sight counts equally or more. How we talk about our partner can make or break the relationship. Speaking badly and venting about our partner makes us look bad, and that negative energy seeps back into the home. Those friends and family now have negative feelings about our partner, and they discourage us from being with them, and so begins the downward spiral.
Speak to and treat your partner the way you want to be treated. You are, after all, equals.
Acceptance
Complete acceptance allows us to grow and flourish. It allows us to transition into a million versions of ourselves as we age, yet our partner loves and accepts each version. We can remove the masks and past programming where we lived to please others and be our authentic, quirky, brainy, silly selves because our partner fully accepts us. Acceptance is the ultimate freedom.
Personal Responsibility and Accountability
Personal Responsibility and accountability are signs of emotional intelligence, maturity, and another level of respect. Being able to apologize when we make a mistake is crucial- after all, we are human, and after all, we all mess up. Owning our mistakes, quickly apologizing, and righting our wrongs go a long way. It makes our partner feel secure, valued, and respected.
Personal responsibility and accountability also encompass time management, motivation, and understanding their role in the partnership.
Emotional Intelligence
Although I put this in the middle of the article, I might value it as the number one factor of importance in relationships. From personal experience, without a high level of emotional intelligence, there can be no conflict resolution or problem-solving, and no single relationship is exempt from these issues. Find someone with awareness who is willing to grow. A high level of emotional intelligence allows for strong communication skills, active listening, good social skills, and empathy.
Compromise
Relationships are an equal partnership. Each person needs to be willing to compromise time and desire. This might be sexual, emotional, intellectual, or financial; it may translate into holiday celebrations time with family. These things need to be talked about openly.
Intimacy
When you hear the word intimacy, the first thing that pops into your mind is likely sexual. However, a balance is essential to maintain a healthy, happy, lasting relationship. If the balance is lacking, one person may stray and have an affair, and the effects are devastating. We must balance emotional, sexual/physical, intellectual, and spiritual intimacy to nurture the relationship.
Openness
Having open, honest conversations about anything on your mind is essential. You need to be able to approach your partner about frustrations and concerns. You also need to celebrate each other’s small victories. Being open and transparent reinforces trust and creates stability and safety in the relationship. It can also help a partner with trauma heal.
Shared Values & Beliefs
Shared values and beliefs are important to create harmony in a home. If one person values cleanliness and the other is a slob, for example, there will be nagging, leading to contempt and relationship failure.
Common Life Goals and Interests
Sharing life goals and interests keeps things spicy and fun. Whether you are adventurous or spontaneous or prefer being home together, common interests create a lasting bond. It gives you something to talk about and get excited about. It gives you the knowledge to share with each other and allows you to expand and grow together.
Final Thoughts
Learning each other’s love language, having patience, and practicing active listening are also part of the process. Love is one of the most profound lessons in life. It is both painful and comforting. We all yearn for it.
I hope you have enjoyed this recipe. As always, I encourage you to “cook” intuitively. Add your own spice and magic to your relationship to keep the passion alive and well. Love is life, the mystic fountain of youth that, when we cherish and fertilize it, gives back and feeds us for a lifetime.
I wish you all the best in life and in love. Do not forget to love yourself and nourish your soul. For a series of short daily videos on this recipe, please join and subscribe to my YouTube Channel.
Peace and light,
Libby Shively McAvoy
Thank you, DR Rawson - The Possibilist, for bringing awareness to the fifty claps. We all appreciate it.
Dr. Gabriella Korosi captures the essence of her beautiful poem perfectly in awe-inspiring photos.
