The Problem with the ‘Cool Girl’

Summary

The article discusses the pitfalls of the 'Cool Girl' archetype, who adopts a non-confrontational, male-identified persona to fit in with men, often at the expense of other women and their own integrity.

Abstract

The author reflects on an episode of "Hells Kitchen" featuring a 'Cool Girl' chef who aligns with her male teammates, even participating in their sexist behavior. This 'Cool Girl' persona, which the author admits to having embodied in the past, is characterized by the desire to avoid being seen as a 'nagging bitch' and to break the stereotype of women as nags. However, the author emphasizes the harm in encouraging negative behavior in men and the objectification of women. She points out that despite trying to be 'one of the guys,' men may still view and treat 'Cool Girls' like other women, especially in dating contexts. The article suggests that 'Cool Girls' should instead use their unique position to gather information and support other women, rather than reinforcing sexist dynamics.

Opinions

The 'Cool Girl' trope is problematic as it can lead to the endorsement of sexist behavior and the devaluation of other women.
'Cool Girls' are often complicit in negative male behavior to avoid being labeled negatively, which is both harmful and ineffective.
Men may not truly distinguish 'Cool Girls' from other women, and the 'Cool Girl' may suffer from the same treatment once in a relationship.
Encouraging or participating in the objectification of women is never acceptable, regardless of the context or intention to fit in.
'Cool Girls' have the potential to use their position to educate and inform other women about the true nature of men's behavior, rather than perpetuating harmful stereotypes.

The Problem with the ‘Cool Girl’

I was watching the Chef Ramsey show “Hells Kitchen” and on one episode they had placed this “cool girl” chef in a team full of men.

They won some sort of challenge, and Chef Ramsey flies them off to a casino or something for some partying and relaxation as a reward.

The problem is all the bad and sexist things the men were doing, the cool girl advocated it.

I can’t remember for sure, but I think she even got the men female strippers, and then danced and objectified the strippers along with them. Some of these men were married, but “cool girl” didn’t care.

“Bite that apple, bitch!”

And herein’ is the problem. As a former “cool girl” myself, I know it's hard and awkward to be the only girl in a group full of men, and you don’t want to seem like that “nagging bitch.” You want to break the stereotype that all women are nags.

But for ef’s sake, don’t ENCOURAGE negative behavior in men!

And don’t encourage the hatred or abuse of other women.

Trust me, they don’t see you as much different from other women anyway. They might be chill with you and let you in as one of their pack, but as soon as you start dating one, they will start treating you like every other girl real quick. And if you encouraged their sexism, now you’ll have to pay the piper when he treats you like every other girl!

If you are too intimidated to say anything, say nothing. Just nod and observe…

Then bring back the intel to headquarters. lol.

Because that’s the cool thing about Cool Girls, they can give other women the drop on men's dirt!

❤️

Thanks for reading! Be sure to subscribe for alerts when I post new articles!

Join our community! It’s fun, friendly, and it PAYS! Your membership fee directly supports Coke Francis and other writers you read. You’ll also get full access to every story on Medium.

Hey, if you appreciate my work, how about leaving me a TIP? It will go to buying me COFFEE and paying bills…mostly the bills though…

Coke Francis created the banners/animations from images purchased from Dreamstime.com. ←This is a referral link. Click on it and I get a percentage of every sale!