The Problem with Perfection

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Abstract

the perfectionist trap, defined as a strong drive for perfection that is cut off from any mature or sufficient understanding of what it takes to achieve it. It is not primarily our fault. Without divulging it or being aware of it in any way, our media manipulate billions of low-key lives and years of failure, rejection, and frustration, to serve up a daily selection of peak career moments. Career moments that don’t seem like violent exceptions, but a standard and a basis for success.</p><figure id="c82f"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*rXBfCWfzg-NVXat3"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@wx1993?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Raychan</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure><p id="50a2">It seems like everyone is successful because everyone we hear about is successful, and we have forgotten to imagine the oceans of tears and despair that necessarily surround them. Our perspective gets out of balance because we know our struggles so well from within and yet are exposed to seemingly painless success stories from the outside. We cannot forgive ourselves for the horrors of our early drafts, mainly because we failed to see the early drafts of those we admire. We need to have a clearer picture of how many difficulties are behind anything we are trying to imitate. For example, instead of looking at a masterpiece in a museum, we should go into the studio and see the fear, the first versions destroyed, and the watermarks on the paper where the artist collapsed and cried.</p><p id="45e2">We need to focus on how long it took for the architect to get his first real assignment. We need to uncover the now award-winning writer’s early stories and take a closer look at the number of failures the entrepreneur ha

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s endured.</p><p id="d253" type="7">We have to recognize the legitimate and necessary role of failure and allow ourselves to make things imperfect for a very long time — as a price, we cannot avoid paying for an opportunity one day, perhaps many decades from now to do something that others consider spontaneous success.</p><h2 id="f246">Thanks for reading!</h2><p id="ea35"><a href="https://mailchi.mp/4e139d80c581/self-improvement-tips"><b><i>Join our community</i></b></a><b> to get more self-improvement tips in the future on your mail.</b></p><p id="1ff8">You may also like…</p><div id="bfb7" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/procrastion-can-be-advantageous-bb15adac2029"> <div> <div> <h2>Procrastion Can Be Advantageous</h2> <div><h3>How you procrastinate is what matters</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*faCJamFDKDBaFu-jyc7PMg.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="5333" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/are-you-sacrificing-your-happiness-in-the-pursuit-of-your-success-5115b834febe"> <div> <div> <h2>Are You Sacrificing Your Happiness in the Pursuit of Your Success?</h2> <div><h3>Success doesn’t count if you aren’t able to find joy during its journey</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*GhQKsWuRnERcjEW8)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

We haven’t seen the early drafts of the ones we admire

We usually pursue a particular career because we have been deeply impressed by the accomplishments of the most accomplished practitioners in the field. We formulate our ambitions by admiring the beautiful structures of the architect designing the city’s new airport, or by following the intrepid transactions of the richest fund manager on Wall Street, reading the analyzes of the famous literary writer, or sampling of the delicious meal by the chef in the restaurants. We design our career plans based on perfection. Then, inspired by the masters, we take our first steps and the trouble begins.

What we designed, made, or wrote in a first short story, or cooked for the family, or make in our first month of trading, is well and absurdly below the standard that sparked our ambitions.

We, who are so conscious of being excellent, have the least efficiency to tolerate mediocrity, which in this case, is ours.

We get stuck in an uncomfortable paradox: Our ambitions were sparked by greatness, but everything we know about ourselves points to an innate incapacity. We have fallen into what we can call the perfectionist trap, defined as a strong drive for perfection that is cut off from any mature or sufficient understanding of what it takes to achieve it. It is not primarily our fault. Without divulging it or being aware of it in any way, our media manipulate billions of low-key lives and years of failure, rejection, and frustration, to serve up a daily selection of peak career moments. Career moments that don’t seem like violent exceptions, but a standard and a basis for success.

It seems like everyone is successful because everyone we hear about is successful, and we have forgotten to imagine the oceans of tears and despair that necessarily surround them. Our perspective gets out of balance because we know our struggles so well from within and yet are exposed to seemingly painless success stories from the outside. We cannot forgive ourselves for the horrors of our early drafts, mainly because we failed to see the early drafts of those we admire. We need to have a clearer picture of how many difficulties are behind anything we are trying to imitate. For example, instead of looking at a masterpiece in a museum, we should go into the studio and see the fear, the first versions destroyed, and the watermarks on the paper where the artist collapsed and cried.

We need to focus on how long it took for the architect to get his first real assignment. We need to uncover the now award-winning writer’s early stories and take a closer look at the number of failures the entrepreneur has endured.

We have to recognize the legitimate and necessary role of failure and allow ourselves to make things imperfect for a very long time — as a price, we cannot avoid paying for an opportunity one day, perhaps many decades from now to do something that others consider spontaneous success.