Summary

The article critiques the current state of men's dating advice, highlighting its toxicity and self-serving nature.

Abstract

The author of the article expresses deep concern over the quality of dating advice offered by male dating gurus, noting a marked decline in the value of their guidance over the past decade. Initially, the advice was somewhat protective and beneficial, but it has since deteriorated into a toxic blend of misogyny and self-interest. The author points out the absurdity of blaming women for dating "losers," when in fact, the definition of a "loser" is often skewed by these gurus to serve their own agendas. Furthermore, the article criticizes the double standard applied to men's and women's behaviors in dating, with men's actions being excused while women's are scrutinized and condemned. The advice given by these gurus is often contradictory and condescending, reducing women to passive roles and expecting them to cater to men's fragile egos, which ultimately leads to unhealthy relationships.

Opinions

Men's dating advice has become increasingly toxic, often blaming women for the state of modern relationships.
The portrayal of women as the sole cause of romantic failures is unfounded and ignores the complexities of human relationships.
The current crop of male dating gurus is likened to abusive stepfathers, offering advice that is harmful rather than helpful.
The rhetoric of PUA (Pick Up Artists), Incel (Involuntary Celibates), and MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) movements has contaminated the dating advice landscape, leading to a widespread culture of toxic masculinity.
The advice to women to stop dating "losers" is hypocritical, as it is self-servingly defined by the dating gurus themselves.
There is a double standard in how men and women are advised to behave in relationships, with men's negative behaviors being excused while women are held to unrealistic standards.
Much of the dating advice is condescending and suggests women should suppress their true selves to appease men, which is detrimental to establishing genuine, healthy relationships.

The Problem with Men’s Dating Advice.

Yeah, guys. No.

I tried. I promise I did.

I read dating books written by men. I supported male dating guru’s YouTube channels. I’ve followed them on Facebook and other social networks.

I listened to men's relationship radio shows for years. And admittedly, maybe 10 or so years ago, they weren’t bad. Men actually gave pretty good relationship advice.

I mean, it still didn’t work for me…but…at least it wasn’t overtly toxic.

It was all the typical riddles that you’ll find in any other dating book.

Men like quiet subdued girls who aren’t afraid to express themselves.

Play hard to get, but don’t lead him on!

Let the man lead and let him be a man, but you know, don’t ACTUALLY expect him to lead and be a man.

“What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of every end, and the end of every race? Figure that out before the hostages DIE, BATMAN. Mwahahahaha!!!!”

— The Riddler

Male dating Guru’s 10–20 years ago were somewhat trustworthy. They approached you like the protective father some of us women never had.

They looked out for us and gave us real advice that was at least somewhat for women's benefit.

Those days are gone, gone, GONE!

Male dating gurus today are less like a protective father and more like the evil step-dad you pray, pray, PRAY, your mama doesn’t leave you alone with…

I wish I was only talking about the PUA and MGTOW asshats we already know are scum. I am not. I am talking about highly abusive men who position themselves as trying to “help” women by berating them and telling women that it’s all our fault for earth's collective unhappiness.

The problem is, PUA/Incel/MGTOW rhetoric is so toxic and widespread that these male dating gurus think they are God’s gift to women because they are slightly less toxic than the typical PUA gibberish.

Slightly less toxic than Hiroshima, after the nukes hit, is still extremely toxic and not helping at all!

Let’s look at some of these dating Guru’s advice, so we can start to dismantle them:

1. Women need to stop having sex with losers. Losers, by definition, is every man not said Dating Guru.

By now, pretty much every woman over 25 has been accused of completely destroying relationships, marriage, love of all kinds, and earth in general, because she can’t stop fucking losers.

If you ask these men to describe the loser for you, it’s every guy that’s not him and his friends.

And some of them will throw their friends under that bus too.

I am waiting for a man with some common sense to point out how ridiculous this is. I mean, there are approximately 49.3 million women in America ages 25 to 44. That’s nearly 50 million women, most of whom have had romantic relationships, even if they haven’t been sexual. So if nearly 50 million women are all dating or married to losers…uhhhh, that sure is a lot of losers!

** Angry dating guru **

ADG: “No! 90% of women are chasing the top 10% of men!”

Seeing as how most of our fathers were not in the 10% sexual Illuminati, I wonder how they figure the majority of us got here. Were all your fathers losers too?

When these men talk about 90% of women, they are not actually talking about us regular everyday women, who often date and marry regular everyday men. They are talking about the imaginary porn star-slash-housewife who lives in their own egocentric madness.

But they are happy to give real shit to the real women, you know, the 99.9 percent of us that actually exist, because porn-star-slash-housewife won’t give them the time of day.

2. Men interpret everything women do in the most negative way possible.

However, everything they do, no matter how evil and selfish, must be interpreted with Christ-like grace.

When a woman “friend zones” a man, it's because she is an evil demonic witch who wants to waste his time and string him along as she dates bad boys. It can’t just be that maybe she wants to get to know him better before jumping into a relationship…or maybe there is something about him that she knows will not make him a good partner for her, but she enjoys his company and likes hanging out as nonsexual friends.

Nope, can’t be anything innocent like that!

But when this guy goes to study picks up artistry, spends copious amounts of time on MGTOW forums, and constantly talks about women like they are beneath him…well…we should pity fuck guys like that, because they're just so heartbroken, and sad. Poor babies!

Derrick Jaxn and Kevin Samuels. 2 dating coaches and 2 sides of the same coin. Photo collage by Coke Francis.

3. Most of their dating advice is completely self-serving

Don’t talk to your man. Don’t tell him about your problems, women talk too much. Always say good things to him and uplift him.

If you have to address a problem to him, talk to him gently, like he’s your buttercup baby! But don’t treat him like he’s a child.

“What is always on its way here, but never arrives, BATMAN? I bet the Penguin and Catwoman will have the governor killed by the time you figure it out! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!”

— The Riddler

Too much of some popular dating guru’s advice is condescending bullshit. Basically, don’t act like a real human being at all, and act like some dumb shit he saw in a movie, music video, or anime cartoon. Then you’ll have the relationship with the PUA asshat of your nightmares. You won’t have a good relationship, but you’ll have a relationship.

Wait, you wanted a good relationship?! You should have made that clearer in the beginning, woman!

There’s so much more we can get into, but maybe I’ll bring out part 2 another time. But between PUA, Red Pill, MGTOW, and just general creepy dating gurus, this generation of American women have it rough in the dating market. I’ll tell you that!

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